How can I keep my husband, who has dementia, and teenage daughter from fighting and avoid family conflict?
My husband has mild dementia and is suffering from depression because he forgets many things. Sometimes he is very aggressive when things are not his way. He is 78 years old and is going worse. We also have a daughter who is 15 years old and they are fighting most the time. I think that he is hiding his dementia with aggressive attitude. What I can do? Many thanks for your help, Dora.
Expert Answer
Let me start by saying how important it is while dealing in family conflict with a teenager, to get some immediate professional help. Ask you family doctor for a referral to a psychologist that works with families and specializes in inter-generational counseling. Your husband who is suffering from dementia and depression can not "consciously" use agressive behavior to cover up his medical condition. Often agressive behavior is a symptom of depression. However most parents are challenged by dealing with a family conflict teenager. Unfortunately your daughter must be suffering from watching her one and only father slowly become incompetent and dependent. The very best advice I can give you is to immediately have your husbands medication levels for depression be re-evaluated. Next get a referral for a family psychologist. Third reach out to your family or community and arrange for a "safe place" where your daughter can go for the night or weekend to get away from family. An additional resource you might check out is our free articles written by me and my wife Carolyn Rosenblatt at AgingParents.com. I hope this helps you situation.