How to Get Mom to Go to Adult Day Care?

3 answers | Last updated: Sep 14, 2017
B21 asked...

The people at adult day care seem much "worse" than Mom. Some vcan not talk, make sounds, in wheel chairs. Is she getting anything out of it. the staff is great. Also, sometimes she refuses to go, suggestions on getting her there?

Expert Answers

Donna Quinn Robbins is the author of Moving Mom and Dad and On the Road of Life, Drive Yourself. She helps individuals, families, retirement communities, and corporations make successful transitions through her company, Ultimate Moves. Robbins is an active public speaker on the topic of senior transition services and has appeared on NBC's Today Show.

You didn't mention what your mother's physical or mental condition is so answers vary accordingly. If her mental condition is good maybe a senior center would be more appropriate. Is this an adult day care for people with dementia? The problem is that it probably scares her because she doesn't want to be classified with the other people who attend. My only suggestion would be for you to go with her the first few times if that is allowed until she becomes more comfortable and meets a few people who are more like her.

Community Answers

Caffe` addict answered...

I sympathize B21's Mom. I am (only) 62 but often imagine myself 20 or 30 years from now unable to do many things. Having to leave home, a place I have been living for decades, to enter a place of "unable" people, is like to tell me "Hey, that's your last stop of life. A place of no return. Adios."

Lle answered...

Donna's answer is very good. I attend a senior center/community center and we have quite a few 90 year olds and a lot of mid 80's and then a number of us in our 70's and 60's. It feels like home and there are ever so many activities. I just learned to play bridge. Sound like mom belongs at a place like this where she can actually make friends. Unfortunately you may not have a place like this but do search for one just in case one is around. Caffe' is right that it may make her feel like the end is just around the corner. We know that is possible but feeling that way every day is discouraging.