What are my options if I need to move but all the nursing homes in the new state have waiting lists?

1 answer | Last updated: Sep 14, 2017
A fellow caregiver asked...

My Mom is currently in a nursing home in PA. I am the only family in PA. Due to a job I will be moving to N.VA. I have called & visited many nursing homes in the area, but any decent ones have a waiting list of years. My Mom is on medicaid. I'm not even sure that she needs nursing home care. She feeds herself,she is alert oriented x3, she does need some assistance dressing & bathing,she needs someone to give her meds, she transfers from wheelchair to her bed & the toilet. She is NOT;confused, incontinent, nor a fall risk or flight risk. I can not desert my wonderful Mother. I've talked to the Dept of Aging. There should be no problem with medicaid approval in the N.VA area. What can I do? She is my priority. Thank you.

Expert Answers

Nan Hayes is founder of MoveSeniors.com, the national resource network of Certified Relocation and Transition Specialists for seniors, and President of RightSized Living, a senior home transition service in Illinois.

You obviously care a great deal for your mother and have remained on top of the situation. Based on your comments, it does not sound as though your mother requires 24-hour care and she may be just as comfortable in an Assisted Living or Continuing Care Community or even at home with frequent professional support.

The home where she currently resides can give you a better idea of her daily needs, or you may wish to consult a Care Manager to discuss care and financial options.

As much as you want to have everything settled before you move, it is important that you make sure you know what your mother wants. As much as you love her, she may be comfortable remaining where she is for a period of time while the "right place" opens up. Be sure to involve her in the conversation and the decision.