Alzheimer's Support Groups

Hello "newcomer," Thank you for posting your question to our community of caregivers! You've come to a great place for input. Perhaps you'll find a few resources helpful for this transitional period:

1. Planning a Move to Assisted Living or a Nursing Home: http://www.caring.com/articles/planning-move-to-assisted-living
2. How to Sidestep Moving-Day Minefields: http://www.caring.com/articles/moving-day-minefields
3. A Step-by-Step Guide to Organizing an Older Relative's Move: http://www.caring.com/articles/moving-older-relative-organized
4. Moving Questions: http://www.caring.com/ask/moving-questions

I hope you find some of these resources to be helpful. Please don't hesitate to contact our team if we may help you find additional resources during this process.

Kind regards, Sho of the Caring.com Community Team

Hi Rusty51, I'm terribly sorry to hear about the problems you are having find care for your mom.

Please refer to the Senior Living Directory to find care providers in your area that may be able to assist you and your husband with your mom's care: http://www.caring.com/local

From the directory homepage, simply enter your city, state and zip code, then select the type of care you are searching for (e.g. Nursing Home, In-Home Care, etc), and you'll be taken to a list of potential providers who may be able to help you. We also include consumer ratings and reviews on provider pages, and hope in the future, you'll return to the directory and share your feedback about any providers with whom you've had a service experience: http://www.caring.com/review_submissions/new?utm_source=community

Please don't hesitate to get in touch with our team if we may help you find additional resources - we're happy to help!

Kind regards, Sho of the Caring.com Community Team

Thank you so much for the information. When mom was in the hospital 3 weeks ago they mentioned Hospice but I thought it was for help at the end. I will talk with mom's Dr Monday and see what she reccomends

You mentioned that your mom has kidney failure. Is she on dialysis? From her point of view, being deaf, blind and demented with its resulting confusion and fear would result in terrible suffering. I agree with the others. Make contact with Hospice. She does qualify. Then you can hire a caregiver from an agency to give you some respite from 24/7 responsibility. And you are not alone any more. The people on this site will help in all kinds of ways. Keep writing and welcome to the site.

They feel she isn't physically capable to go threw surgery for the shunt for dialysis. The anesthesia would be to much for her. so we take it one day at a time, some times one hour at a time. She gets so agraviated that she doesn't understnad or hear what people are saying and I understand. The Dr's talk with me and she feels left out so I repeat to her what they are saying. It's bad enough to have one of these things happening to you but all of then at once is to much. She was perfectly healthy until she was about 82 and living on her own so I'm proud of her . It was after she broke her hip that everything went down hill.

Rusty, I am so sorry to hear about your mom's suffering and this is something I have personal experience with. I am now completely deaf and my greatest fear is being in a hospital or institution and being unable to communicate or participate in my own well being. And I also am a doctor and have experience with the situation of everything changing in an instant when there has been a serious accident. But there is a silver lining for some people including your mother and that is that her kidneys are failing. It would be cruel and senseless with so many things failing to do something like dialysis or other major intervention. Your mother is at the end of her life but she has been fortunate to be independent before her accident and she is fortunate to have a compassionate daughter like you who can hold her close and calm her fear and let her go peacefully into whatever lies on the other side. Please get Hospice care for her. Your doctor may not be aware of how much help and support they can provide. And they will provide for your mother's comfort.

WEEKLY dusting?? Not even when I wasn't a caregiver. Now I don't worry about it at all. Just as long as the bathroom and kitchen are sanitary. I had to start grinding up mom's pills and hiding them in a spoonful of yoghurt because I also found pills all over the place. Now there is no doubt that they're in her mouth and getting swallowed. Make sure you do get the much needed breaks, LoveLasts. Hugs to you.

I have the same problems with pills. The potasium one is too big so I have to break it in quarters which makes her cough and spit pills all over the place. I think she also hides them. We have been checking her mouth. I did not dust much either really. I just thought it sounded like I was a nice clean person. I used to pay my sister to clean for me and it was rediculous. I would clean up the day before she came in. Now she is alot messier than me. A real horder who basically moves papers from one pile to another on a daily basis.

They are all pill hoarders! it has been six months since mom passed on and every once in a while when we move something there is another little pill! Now my dog is doing the same thing , hiding it in her cheek until we leave the room and spitting them out! Can't win! LOL

Dusting , cough, cough ,cough. No Should I? cough, cough. cough!

Dust is a preservative

What I do about larger pills is I use a pill crusher thing so it's powder and then I add it to apple sauce or yoghurt and it's easy for mom to get down.

Apparently a person should check with the pharmacy to make sure it's o.k. to crush certain pills because some have a protective coating on them.

I only do it if there is a line in the middle.

Yes, that way you know it's o.k. to break them up. I checked with our pharmacist because some of mom's pills do not have a line but he said it's fine.

DH supplements have to be liquid now. Harder to find, expensive. He lives on a good breakfast plus meals of peanut butter sandwiches - soft whole wheat bread with crusts removed - bananas or apple sauce, chocolate anything including milk shakes, fresh fruits but no veggies, anything sweet. I have to keep goodies out of sight. Far from a healthy diet but best we can do. Swallowing is hard, chewing almost non-existent. Won't eat pureed foods altho I bot one cup size containers with lids for Osterizer. Have tried baby food but no go.

All this sharing is so helpful. We all need new inspirations!

thanks for the ideas as i am hving the problem with my Fil..he isnt taking them unless we stay right there and watch him

Hi Piver I have looked up liquid diet before and this is what whicapedia says. Types of liquid diet

[edit] Clear liquid diet

A clear liquid diet consists of transparent liquid foods such as vegetable broth, bouillon, clear fruit juices, clear fruit ices, popsicles, clear gelatin desserts, and no carbonated drinks. Soda's carbonation expands the gastrointestinal tract.

[edit] Full liquid diet

A full or strained liquid diet consists of both clear and opaque liquid foods with a smooth consistency. It includes milk, milkshakes, ice cream, puddings, strained cream soups, fruit nectar with pulp, smooth cooked cereals such as porridge and cream of wheat, butter, and honey. Fruit juices (without pulp), coffee, gelatin, popsicles (without pulp), water, and clear carbonated beverages are also acceptable. My sister the CNA discussed this with me when my mom was having trouble swallowing. I hope it helps.

I need that sign: TEST DUST - DO NOT REMOVE! ♥ LOL

Go to search and type in Activities to do with dementia patients. After doing this search, this is some of the things Caring.com listed:

Recreational activities

Playing card games, especially old favorites or simple games like War. Consider large-print cards. Playing board games, such as checkers or Chinese checkers. Working word-search puzzles. Look for large-print versions of books. Flipping through scrapbooks or photo albums. Identifying people in old photos. (Write down what you learn!) Reading books and magazines; look for those heavy on images (coffee-table books and magazines on design, travel, photography). Working jigsaw puzzles. You may need to experiment to find some that challenge without frustrating. On the bright side, you'll be able to use a successful one repeatedly. Consider puzzles designed for people with dementia. Playing catch with a softball or beanbag. Spending time with animals. Visit a neighbor's dog or arrange to have a child bring one over every day. Visit a pet store. Provide a fish tank or goldfish bowl. Going out for ice cream cones. Not having to sit down, as you would at a restaurant, may be less stressful. Following an exercise video. Check YouTube.com for that favorite of '60s and '70s housewives, Jack LaLanne, an icon ahead of his time who may be familiar to the person you're caring for. Listening to old radio shows (check your local library or alzstore.com). Playing dance music and dancing. Watching a digital picture frame with rotating images of family members. Set it so pictures change slowly. * Ask open-ended questions about the pictures as you watch. Reading old comics. Look for books that are collections of classics from the person's era, like Peanuts, Family Circus, Little Nemo. Looking through a personal-memories box. Include such items as military pins, baby clothes, postcards, pictures of old houses, costume jewelry, and other tactile icons that have meaning to the person. Caring for a doll. In late-stage dementia, people often find comfort in "taking care of" a baby doll or simply cuddling and stroking a stuffed animal.

One idea listed was to polish silver. I thought this was a great idea! Deb

There is a book called the best friends book of alzheimers activities. You can either buy it or get it from the library. There are 2 different volumes. Usually what I do is get it at the library and then If I like it I buy it.

Welcome Reenie, no new ideas but some good ones given already. Hope some of them meet with her approval. By the way, my mom likes her doll which we bought at the Alzheimer Store (on line). They're not cheap but they are absolutely adorable.

whew ! I think I need to copy down some of these ideas - you guys are on a roll!! ♥ thanks! ♥ and good luck to you, Reenie!

My mom used to like Fashion Show, We would try on clothing and match up purses and hats etc. to see how we looked so it was easy to just dress up and go out. Sometimes we would visit the local thrift stores and shop like it was Macy's, it was fun for awhile. Also match up pairs of earrings

I pull apart my mom's socks and she matches them up. She also puts her blouses on the hangers.

Wow! Thank you all so much for these ideas. I will definitely try some of these. You are all so wonderful and I know many of you are experiencing similar situations. I do take her out of the house as I am only with her for 3 hours and she spends the rest of the day at her home until her husband gets home. We walk through the neighborhood, sometimes go to the park, she likes gardens, but she doesn't want to stay anywhere more than a few minutes so those 3 hours seem like 10 sometimes.