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How to manage medication for an uncooperative patient?

Retired mom asked...

My 61 y/o husband is on numerous medications for COPD, heart, chronic back pain, neuropathy, etc. He is also involved in chemotherapy and radiation therapy for non-hodgkins lymphoma. Some are strong narcotics and he has a tendency to take more than prescribed if he is not monitored. We argue about this and I am so fearful that he might overdose. He is also on oxygen therapy at home and doesn't always take this as prescribed. I am starting to feel like we have a parent child relationship now and I am not just a caregiver anymore. How can I get him to understand that I only want to help him?

Expert Answer

Linda Adler is the director of Pathfinders Medical in Palo Alto, California. She has dedicated her professional life to helping patients and their families find optimal ways to deal with medical challenges. She has worked in all facets of the medical establishment, including primary care, research, and policy settings at UCSF, Stanford, and Kaiser Permanente. Her current focus at Pathfinders includes crisis management, mediation, and advocacy.

Hi there,

How about buying a pill box and organizing it weekly? Many of the caregivers I work with find that rather than trying to talk about this issue, just supplying an easy solution gets the job done. And the majority of the time, the patient finds that this makes their lives easier too, and accept it quite readily.

One other thought: have you explored any options for getting some support with this situation? Inevitably, illness yields all sorts of challenges, and talking to a trusted advisor can help. Do you have a good friend, a spiritual advisor, a medical professional or a counselor you can talk to?

Please do write back and let us know how you're doing,

Linda