10 Things You Should Know About Your Parents' Finances
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Do they have a durable power of attorney, and where is it?
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Where do they keep their financial records?
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What are their monthly expenses?
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How can I pay their bills if necessary?
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What kind of medical insurance do your parents have in addition to Medicare?
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What's their income and where does it come from?
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Have your parents done any estate planning?
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If they can no longer live on their own, what can they afford in terms of housing?
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What financial planning have they done?
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Do they have an advance health directive?
Last updated:
29-Oct-2009
When caring for elderly parents, it can be a wake up call about the state of your own finances. When planning your parents' future, start planning for your own family's future. Confidant is an easy-to-use online servie that helps you organize and manage your family's critical information in one spot. Protect yourself and your family. See what Confidant can do for your family at www.beconfidant.com.
As my mother's 10 year Health Care Power of Attorney and 26 year caregiver, I knew everything. I was prepared. What I didn't anticipate was mom getting ill suddenly and me not being notified by a jealous sister who had the daily visual contact. My mother fell on a Thursday. My sister took charge and never informed me there had been an incident. When I called mom, Friday, my sister answered the telephone and said, "Mom's going home with me for the weekend." I said, "That's nice." By the time my sister realized mom needed medical treatment, Saturday morning, it was too late. Mom had received 3 compression fractures from the fall. She was severely dehydrated from taking Darvocet on an empty stomach. She was 2 hours from death. Her heart and kidney's were failing. She had a massive stroke that left her unable to communicate. And she was 90 years old. I wasn't notified until mom was being airlifted to a major hospital. Honoring hers wishes by refusing the feeding tube, seven days later, was like declaring WWIII with my siblings. No one knows mom was near death when my sister took her to the hospital, except my sister. She has yet to tell anyone. I discovered the truth after mom's death. I obtained the emergency room records. All my siblings are accusing me of killing mom. The entire community has shunned my husband and I. It's a rural area. I'm sitting on the medical evidence. I'm not sure what to do. I don't know if I want a relationship with any one who didn't trust my judgment or who forms an opinion without asking me for my side of the story. The moral of the story is don't assume you'll be told a medical crisis has occurred.
This is a great checklist. I thought we had it covered with my husband's brother having power of attorney, but I realize none of us know details about what the monthly bills are, or details of their medical insurance.