What rights do I have to see my father?

3 answers | Last updated: Nov 16, 2016
Teach asked...

What rights do I have to see my father who has been given a time limit on life and who resides with my sister? She allows all other siblings to call and come over except for me and has threatened to have me arrested if I step on her property.


Expert Answers

Barbara Repa, a Caring.com senior editor, is an attorney, a journalist specializing in aging issues, and the author of Your Rights in the Workplace (Nolo), now in its 10th edition.

Practically speaking, your best chance to visit with your father will be to try to smooth things over with your sister. It sounds as if the two of you are on a rocky path—and in truth, may never see eye to eye or become buddies. But she may be able to be convinced that you have your father’s best interests at heart and deserve some time with him while there is still the opportunity for that.

Unless you are acting belligerently or threateningly, the police will not likely arrest you for being on your sister’s property unless she has a restraining order against you. Still, you would be wise to arrange for a visit in advance rather than show up on her doorstep.

Think of other people who might be able to help you and your sister work this out. If your father has expressed a desire to see you, this should speak the most loudly and convincingly for all concerned. Also, another one of your siblings or a family friend, for example, may be able to convince your sister of your good intentions more easily than you can at this point—and might also be willing to come along or be stationed nearby on the first visit or two. After that, your sister may see fit to relax her visitation rules.

If this option doesn’t work, consider consulting a family mediation service. Most areas have community boards or other groups that can intercede to help work out solutions in such situations—and their help is usually free or inexpensive.


Community Answers

Dayzee4444 answered...

no sibling has any right to stop anyone from visiting a parent any where they are,,, and the sister who has the parent living with them should just leave the house when the other sister wants to visit...that way they dont have to see each other!


Sandiegozac answered...

My father has ESRD, is on dialysis 3x a week had chf and is eating less, less responsive and sleeping most the time. he does not want dialysis, but his curent wife who is power of attorney and is having medical problems herslef is forcing him to go to =dialysis and thinks he will get well again. He is at total max assist and can not walk. He was just rushed to emergency on monday with severe UTI that make him unresponsive. I am durable power of attorney if my step mother can not perform duties or chooses not to perform duties. However, she is delegating her authority to her duaghter who is a great person but is not a power of attorney or in AHCD or will. He is being robbed of his dignity and would not want to live this way. I can not bring up end of life issues with his wife or she cuts me off from getting information from rehab or hosipital since i live in san diego and he is in delaware. I am now in Delaware indefinately to make sure my dad has proper care. One other issue is they put my dad's name on the title of my step sister's home so she could refinance because she needed his income and my step mom;s's income to qualify for a refinance after she got divorcced. So money is an issue. I feel they will keep him on dialysis until the day he dies so they can collect the 3K a month from his pension. what can i do? My stepmother clearly is not physically able to take care of him, but is mentally competent to make decisions. they just are not what my father would have wanted. Help