How to do about wife who takes 88 year old husband out to dinner despite poor behavior?

2 answers | Last updated: Oct 02, 2016
Sharile asked...

I am a caregiver for a 88 year old Male. His wife insists on taking him out to restaurants for dinner. Most of their friends will not go out with them anymore because of how he acts (throwing bread, etc.). What do you suggest?

Expert Answers

Merrily Orsini, MSSW, was a pioneer in the business of providing geriatric care managed in-home care. She currently serves on the board of the National Association for Home Care and Hospice and is Chair of the Private Duty Homecare Association. She holds a master's degree in social work and is a nationally known writer and speaker on aging, elder issues, and in-home care.

Your question about bad behavior of 88 year old at restaurants, is a hard one to answer. It seems that the husband must have some sort of dementia that results in a behavioral problem, but you really do not say. If he has always misbehaved, then the answer would be different.

It seems that the wife prefers the company while dining out, although bad, to no company at all, or to not going out at all. How about if you work on getting someone else to go out to dinner with her?

Community Answers

Sharile answered...

Hi He does have Dementia but she refuses to go without him. I have tried telling her to leave him home with me but she doesn't feel thats right. I explained that the comostion in the restaurant adds to his nervousness.