My mother in law has dementia. My husband and I sold our home and moved into her home to take care of her. Both my in laws have dementia, and my father in law passed on 3 years ago. My husband and myself were paying a live in care giver for the past 4 years. We loved her, and thought of her as family, but with the economy what it is we realized we had go through gone through about six figures a year of our savings,and we could not keep paying for the care giver and keep our house to. So we moved in with her 7 months ago. Her siblings and other realatives rearly came to see her ,thay all live close by.
Here is my situation, my mother in law has always been the kind of woman who could not say no to relatives, she gave money away no questions asked, well people took advantage of her, and her mental condetion. Once my husband took over her banking and now pays all her bills, shes had one visit in 7 months. She no longer reconizes her family, and when thay did come all thay did was talk about dead realatives and her childhood home. I and my husband asked them prior to there visit not to mention certian things that stick with her and leave her depressed and agatated for weeks later. My father in law passed on 3 years ago, and she does not mention him at all. She doesn't realize hes gone. She thinks her mom is still alive also. My mother in law is 88.
Im a stright in your face kinda lady, and I have let relatives know why certian topics cant be mentioned. They dont seem to care. They dont have to deal with the fall out there words have on my mother in law. When she gets depressed she stops eating and drinking ensure. S humming bird eats more food then she does. The ensure is keeping her alive. How can i get people to understand what ther words to to her?