Alzheimer's Support Groups

Hi Adilyn, Thanks for posing this question, and thanks to all who offered such practical and helpful suggestions! Here's more information and resources on Caring.com that may likewise be helpful to you... - [A Caregiver's Guide to Elder Companions](https://www.caring.com/articles/caregivers-guide-to-elder-companions) -- it includes a link to the in-home care directory to help you find this type of professional in your community (and read ratings and reviews from other caregivers, seniors and consumers of their services): [https://www.caring.com/local/in-home-care](https://www.caring.com/senior-care/in-home-care) - Here are some tips for discussing this option with your parents: [https://www.caring.com/articles/how-to-get-your-loved-one-to-accept-an-elder-companion](https://www.caring.com/articles/how-to-get-your-loved-one-to-accept-an-elder-companion) - Here are ideas for memory enhancers for loved ones with Alzheimer's and other sources of dementia: [https://www.caring.com/articles/memory-enhancers-for-alzheimers](https://www.caring.com/articles/memory-enhancers-for-alzheimers) I hope this helps! Please do let us know if you need more ideas or guidance. Thanks!

Adding my welcome to the others. Can't help on this one as my Mom is in a nuirsing ho,e, but you are getting some good answers. My MIL had Lou Gehirgs and the only one who could get her to do things was my husband. We made many calls to him during the day to get MIL to do something. It is hard enough taking care of them much less to have to deal with this.

Hi Adilyn, One more welcome! My only advice is what worked for me...though it wasn't intientional...if the caregiver is willing to do a little light "housework"...you can just tell him it is a housekeeper to help Mom! DH still doesn't know he is being looked after...so he is OK with it. This happened for me as my "Housekeeper" was willing to commit to the exgtra time to be the caregiver...and he was sort of familiar with her that way...and never complained. Also, he doesn't need companionship...he is good with peace and quiet. Good luck on your road...you will find help and friends here.

DGraab Thank you very much for the feedback. It is day 5 that Mom has been at the nursing home. It has been very hard for me not to go & see her everyday, but I have resisted because I have to. My son & daughter-in-law & husband have visited her. She did tell my husband to take her home, but he changed the subject & she seemed to be ok. I am planning on going there tomorrow to pick up her laundry & visit. I have been enjoying my free time, but there are moments when I think Mom is still here & I go to get up & check on her. Everything is a learning process. This respite thing is no different.

Hi Gale, Thanks for sharing about this transition in care for your mom while you get some much-deserved rest and respite from caregiving! I hope all continues to go well with her living arrangement this month, and that you'll share feedback about the provider to help other families in their search for care too: [https://www.caring.com/review_submissions/new?utm_source=community](https://www.caring.com/review_submissions/new?utm_source=community) Looking ahead beyond September, here are more ways to find respite care: [https://www.caring.com/articles/respite-care](https://www.caring.com/articles/respite-care) Caring.com also offers tips and strategies for managing caregiver stress and maintaining well-being: [https://www.caring.com/caregiver-wellness](https://www.caring.com/caregiver-wellness) Lastly, beware the 7 Deadly Emotions of Caregiving: [https://www.caring.com/articles/7-deadly-emotions-of-caregiving](https://www.caring.com/articles/7-deadly-emotions-of-caregiving) I hope these suggestions are helpful to you!

Thank you Dawn. I don't know what the future holds, but I am hoping that this much needed break gives me the strength to care for Mom when she comes home. I don't want to place her in a nursing facility for the rst of her days on this Earth, put is a possibility if I find it's just too much for me to handle any longer.

Thank you "overwelmed," for turning to this group for support -- as you can see, there are many people here who you can talk to and who do care about how you're feeling. Many thanks to all who shared their positive feedback and suggestions on this thread! Here is some information and resources on Caring.com that may likewise be helpful... - Consider enlisting the services of an elder companion or professional in-home caregiver to assist with caring for your mom and give you a break sometimes: [https://www.caring.com/local/in-home-care](https://www.caring.com/senior-care/in-home-care) Here are more ideas for finding respite care when you need a break: [https://www.caring.com/articles/respite-care](https://www.caring.com/articles/respite-care) - The "Caregiver Wellness" section (at the top of Caring.com pages) offers a variety of tips and ideas to help manage caregiver stress and maintain well-being: [https://www.caring.com/caregiver-wellness](https://www.caring.com/caregiver-wellness) It also includes a section to help you differentiate stress from burnout or depression (and what to do about each condition): [https://www.caring.com/caregiver-stress](https://www.caring.com/caregiver-stress) - Caring for a senior loved one takes a heavy toll on the caregivers' work life: in research we've conducted, 3 in 4 family caregivers reported that they had to change their job situation or do not work in order to provide care: [https://www.caring.com/infographics/emotional-and-financial-costs-of-caregiving](https://www.caring.com/infographics/emotional-and-financial-costs-of-caregiving) If you decide to continue working but change jobs to one that doesn't involve more caregiving, here are some ideas for job hunting after age 50: [https://www.caring.com/articles/7-secrets-to-getting-a-job-after-50](https://www.caring.com/articles/7-secrets-to-getting-a-job-after-50) - Your local Area Agency on Aging may also have suggestions to offer and can refer you and your mom to programs and services in your community: [https://www.caring.com/local/area-agency-on-aging](https://www.caring.com/local/area-agency-on-aging) Please do let us know if we can be of further assistance to you in your caregiving. Thanks!

Dear overwhelmed, I remember those days , mom was still walking around,falling everyday, never listened to me,it was so frustrating . Know she is in the late end stage, still ornery but it's easier because once I get her settled I can do some housework, the lifting is hard as she pulls the other way , but I lose my cool a lot less, as we were talking on another string, you need to somehow find time for yourself , an we are all good listeners ! Hugs kim

Great idea Peggy. Staying home with mom and then Maybe another person as a day care giver so someone else who is caring for a family member. . Make more money per hr so maybe you can work less hrs. Or at least time and money to give you a break. We're one a roll. It is a much needed perfession. You have creditals and resumed bet by placing ad you can find someone who needs your service. Taking care of one other in your own home will at least be less of a challenge than a whole assisted living plus same amount or more money than now. I tell everyone who has the blessing of providing care and education with autistic kids or ADD ADHD senior care giver to go private and man have they been so blessed to make more money than working for someone.

Hi In-Law Caregiver, Thanks for posting this question, and thanks to all who offered gift ideas! Here are some more...

• Grandparents' Day is September 9th this year, and our senior editor, Paula Spencer Scott compiled these 10 Easy Gifts Kids Can Make: https://www.caring.com/articles/10-grandparent-gifts More homemade gift ideas for seniors (and their caregivers): https://www.caring.com/blogs/caring-currents/homemade-gift-ideas-for-seniors-caregivers

• For dementia-friendly choices, Paula suggests focusing on these 6 key words: https://www.caring.com/blogs/fyi-daily/gift-ideas-for-someone-with-alzheimers More ideas for gifts for loved ones with Alzheimer's: https://www.caring.com/articles/gifts-for-people-with-dementia-alzheimers

• Our friends at VoiceQuilt also have some keepsake gifts to consider: http://www.voicequilt.com/ Gold Violin is another source of gifts for seniors: http://www.goldviolin.com/

• Furry toys, animals, and dolls have been helpful to some older adults with dementia: https://www.caring.com/blogs/caring-currents/toys-for-dementia The gift of music can also be therapeutic: https://www.caring.com/blogs/fyi-daily/the-wow-power-of-music-for-people-with-alzheimers

I hope these ideas are helpful to you, and you're successful in finding or making the 'just right' gifts for your FIL.

A large piece jig-saw puzzle? His sons are not being realistic about the stage of life he is really in. Yes, buy it for yourself - sounds like fun, actually! And leave it around for FIL.

I agree, giving your FIL something he would enjoy using is a great idea. I used to think the same way but seeing how much my mom enjoys her life like doll and the little stuffed animals, I realized that it doesn't matter at all.

Hi Kathy, I hope everything went well with your mom's doctor appointment and treatment for this sleep issue. Thanks to everyone who offered support and feedback too! Here are some tips we have on Caring.com for helping a loved one with dementia and sleep issues...

• Ask & Answer: How can I solve sleep problems for my mother with Alzheimer's? Another related Q&A: How do we keep Dad from getting up multiple times a night with out medication?

• 5 Ways to Regulate Sleep in Severe Dementia

• Better Sleep for Dementia Caregivers: Two Fresh Solutions

• Sleep problems info center

I hope these resources are helpful to you if this problem has continued, and helpful to others having this problem as well. Please do let us know if there's more we can do to support you in your caregiving. Thanks!

Thanks everyone. She's got a regular dr appt next week, so I'll bring it up with him. I do give her melatonin at dinner time, but it's not time release. I'm going to look for that tomorrow. We have a walgreens nearby.

Most melatonin is not TIME RELEASED. So if u get a chance to try time released it worked better for mom. She actually didn't get up at the night and slept in a little longer. I got mine at a Walgreens only time released I have found. It 10 mg not the normal 3 to 5. I still use it if I amd restless of have a lot of pain. That way if I wake up at night I can go back to sleep. The lord only knows how much you all need sleep :))))))).