How do I get financial POA for my mother?
I am the POA for my mother who has been diagnosed with dementia.
My older sister went with my mom to the bank and added her name to our mom's accounts so now they are joint accounts with her. This seemed reasonable at the time.
Now, I am concerned that I will not be able to get an accounting from the bank now of how the money is spent, and my sister is resentful of my asking her.
What can and should I do as POA in this situation, and can I get financial POA?
Expert Answer
The legal answer to your question may depend on where the account is held. Some state statutes—Florida is one example of this—specifically give the agent of a power of attorney the right to access a joint holder’s account, even without the consent or knowledge of the other account owner. In many states, however—the majority of them—the law is simply silent on the issue; in these states, people in need of legal guidance would need to research whether the courts have made a decision on the topic.
To research the law in your state, try an Internet search for “power of attorney” “joint account,” “access” and “the name of the state.” Or you could ask the bank manager or an attorney for the specific answer to the question.
However, in your case, the legal answer may not provide completely satisfactory guidance, since your sister may still feel resentful about your queries and you may still feel sneaky and disturbed about having to go behind her back.
So no matter what the letter of the law is in your state, try once more to resolve the issue openly before your psyches take over and make the issue of access bigger than it is in reality. Explain to your sister that you are legal charged with managing your mothers account—and making sure the money is spent in your mother’s best interests. And respect that your sister may need access to the funds to make purchases on your mother’s behalf and doesn’t want you hovering and fretting over every expenditure.
If you and your sister remain unable to see eye to eye on the situation, you may be able to convince the bank manager to send you both monthly statements of the account. Or you may be able to remove all humans from the equation by setting up the account so that both you and your sister have Internet access to it.