Phone
(800) 973-1540

What to do about elderly father who has alzheimer's and smokes.

Amoore1981 asked...

My 73yr old father who smoked from the day he was 15 now had alzheimer's and still smokes but just recently in the last few days he's becoming more persistent about asking for his cigarettes. I quit buying cartons for him due to the fact he would smoke them all in about 4 days so now i roll them for him but as i mentioned he's asking more and more for a cigarette. He can smoke one and then not even in 5 minutes he asks me again for one. What can i do. I tried the fake cigarettes but he won't have anything to do with them and also tried the nicotine patches and of course had the same results. Any suggestions please?

Expert Answer

Brenda Avadian, brings knowledge, hope, and joy to family caregivers for loved ones with Alzheimer's and dementia. She cared for her father with Alzheimer's and helps families one-on-one and in groups. She is the author of eight books, including the pioneering memoir "Where's my shoes?" My Father's Walk through Alzheimer's and the Finding the JOY in Alzheimer's series. She presents vivid, compelling, and funny keynotes to both professional and family caregiving audiences.

Smoking and Alzheimer's don't mix; however, a habit is hard to break, especially if your father's been smoking for 58 years.

First, there's the SAFETY issue.

Depending on how far along Alzheimer's is what if he falls asleep with a lit cigarette?

Or what if he doesn't snuff it out completely?

Is someone able to be with him each time he has a smoke?

Second, there's the hard-to-break-long-term-habit issue.

We nonsmokers can easily give you solutions, but the reality is if his mind is diminished due to dementia, he's comforted by a routine. Your father's routine may be to have a cigarette while performing certain activities during the day. Take his cigarettes away from him and you'll have one grouchy father.

I suggest when he asks for a cigarette, have two handy. Either you or someone sit with your father while he enjoys the cigarette then if he asks for another, you'll have one handy.

If he asks for a third, next time around, you'll tell him the second cigarette is the last one you have; so, he'd better enjoy it.

The electronic cigarettes don't work for everyone. And given your father's Alzheimer's, this may not be so much about nicotine addiction as it is a habit and his familiarity with the feel of a cigarette and the smell of the smoke.

Let us know how this works.

Eventually, as you limit his smoking and as the disease progresses, he'll forget. Until then, may patience be your constant companion.