POD "A" (Parents of Disabled Adults)
POD "A" (Parents Of Disabled Adults) forum/online support/shared advocacy network/information exhange for parents of adult children with mental/learning disabilities.
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I am a divorce parent of a disabled adult child. My daughter is a ward of the state and when she became an adult my ex was notified that she would need a legal guardian. He called me while I was managing my overseas business to ask if he should be legal guardian because of his closer location. I said of course, not understanding that from that point on I would not be able to discuss my daughter with any caregiver or educator without his permission. He is not sharing any information with me and all of my emails to her Caregivers are going unanswered - because they do not have his permission to talk to me. My question is about Guardianship, and whether two parents can be granted co-guardianship and if I will need to be approved by him to receive future information. I am seriously not well off to afford a lawyer, but I need to know things about my daughter's progress or regression, and my ex is not willing to offer help in any way. Any suggestions would be most helpful. Thank you in advance for any consideration.
I am a mother of an adult daughter who is 30. She has been able to live on her own for periods of time, but recently has gone way downhill. She suffers from Bi polar, P.T.S.D., Asperger's , and God knows what else! . I had lived apart from her during the time she was doing well,( She had caregiver's come to her place) but now I feel it is time to "reign her in" , and go back to basics with her. I want to move her back home, at least part time- to give her much needed Mommy time- yet still have some independence. My spouse does not agree with my choice, and feels it should be up to the state, or others to care for her. My spouse feels like she is too old for me to bring her home, and that I would be making a sacrifice of my life. I disagree. I know that someday I will not be around, and then it will be up to the state, but for now I feel she is my daughter, and I should look after her. Can I ask this group for comments ?
Hello I'm a mother of a beautiful daughter with Aspeber with biploar I need help with finding something for her to do at the age of 20 because of her high functioning there are know programs to assist me I'm home 24 hours per day i can know longer work
Allis Mom said...
Hello! I am a mom of a 22 year old daughter who graduated on the school system recently. After years of trying to decide what to do for her during the day, I came to the conclusion that I needed to have her in a day program. It all depends on which state you live in. My lovely state with the pass 3 governors in jail have wiped out the special needs funds, but with a little reserve. I only had two options. Pay $11/hour for a 5 hour day program or place her is a 24/7 home with others with similar disabilities. 15 years ago you could bury me alive if I had to put her in a home. Not until she was around 20 is when she started attacking others around her at school, bus and sometimes at home. When I had foot surgery a year ago is when she became more aggressive (which I believe) it was a disruption in her day pattern. She never lashed out at me until I had the surgery. We have started a slow process to transfer in a home. I was hysterical to think about it, but deep down I can't give her the repetitive scheduled life she would thrive on. As long as we transfer slowly, it will be good for her and me. If anyone want to share their story about placing their adult or young adult child in a home, please do. Sometimes, I feel I am the only one that has to do this, but seeing the homes, there are plenty of parents that have done so. God bless all of you!
Hello, I’m new to group. My daughter is 31 has autism and several severemedical issues. I am currently having some major issues and need advice. My daughter became severely mentally ill after being taken off one of her psych medications over 2 years ago. Basically she has struggled with severe issues since that time. A once busy, involved woman(volunteering, attending a day program), my daughter was reduced to sitting on the couch day after day. I took an fmla and we spent our days/ months together.i would encourage her to walk outside(even if just for a minute), or playia game, etc. She had limited behavior support services, but that was very expensive. She does have a pfds waiver but it was quickly used up with her increased needs. We were then referred to a team of people that include behavior support and psychiatrist. These people have caused severe stress in our lives. I was under the impression that they would work directly to assist my daughter, but they only visit my daughter sit and talk with her and tell me to get her out of the house more They have necer given any direction or assistance in our completing this. They have recently accused me of making up her symptoms( medical and mental), since they’ve never seen them . I am working on completing a guardianship and only have power of attorney. What can I do? We have monthly meetings with my daughters support coordinator and a local ARC advocate who seem to think this team is doing well.
about 2 months
Hello. I am my 26-year-old daughter's legal guardian, since her 2013 brain surgery left her with cognitive and medical problems. A nurse's aide stays with her for 8 hours while I'm at work, but - with drive-time - my job keeps me away from home for 10 hours or more. I'm thinking about hiring someone to be here for her in exchange for rent-free use of our extra bedroom and common areas of the house. But: how can I trust anyone to be responsible for and alone with my daughter, who is vulnerable due to memory issues, etc.? How can I find the perfect roommate to help us? Thanks for your thoughts!
about 2 months
I need an attorney that will represent me in false allegations by APS concerning my disabled adult child. They have already taken her out of my home and been granted temporary guardianship. She is barely 18 (birthday 9/13/99). They have hidden her and will not let me see her. She has a rare disorder that they keep asking me how to handle. I will not talk to them without an attorney.
about 2 months
My sister has moderate CP and uses a wheelchair. She can maneuver the chair some, Type (slowly), speaks well, feeds herself and has bowell and bladder control, but needs help getting out of bed, toileting, dressing & bathing, etc. My parents are in their 70's and are getting close to not being able to lift her. She has a supports coordinator, who has hooked my parents up with several agencies, but the caregivers are not dependable at all!! One agency informed my parents on Tuesday that they couldn't serve my sister anymore as of Friday. One has sent 3 women so far and 2 have not shown up with no notice, lied, etc. etc. For a long time my parents said she was not eligible for much of anything in terms of a residential situation bc her IQ was too high. So what happens to a person who is unable to care for themselves but does not have an MI diagnosis? My father, who lifts her (but shouldn't) could become incapacitated at any time, yet no one seems to be able to tell me where she would go. The agency/caregiver solution doesn't seem feasible long term, bc the caregivers don't show up!
I have 5 young children and live in a house with 20 steps.
Any help or support would be greatly appreciated. We're in PA.
I am a mother caring for my 26 year old daughter who has a back injury and has been on narcotics for almost 5 years. I can't stand to see her like a zombie when she takes her meds. I am getting so tired. I work full time and have an FMLA to take her to appointments but it is all wearing me down. I am tired of wondering if I should call an ambulance or she just needs to sleep it off. Her brain is going to be damaged maybe permanently. Thanks for listening--I don't have any other kind of support.
my aunt's daughter and husband both have mental disabilities and have recently done a disappearing act with there 2 toddlers. they all live with my aunt & just decided to go a vacation one day and left everything they needed for the kids behind for 7 days and no word from either of them. how can my aunt get legal rights over her grand sons?
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