Caregiving at Home
This online support group for in-home care discussions connects caregivers, family, friends, and others with an interest in aging in place. Get tips, advice, and support for your in-home care questions or concerns. Post best practices and success stories. Share about your in-home care experiences or challenges with others who understand. Ask for feedback or exchange ideas to help optimize aging in place for older adults.
Additional resources that may be helpful:
Help spread the support to more people in need -- Please tell a friend or two. Thanks!
What's New Today
5 days ago
I live with and care for both my Mom and Dad. I also have a full time job. they are 83 and 89 years old. I set up all medication and take them to appointments. I am so depressed I'm having trouble climbing out of bed in time for my 2nd shift job. I've been here for 2 years and my anxiety over what I'll do when either 1 or the other of them needs more care or a nursing home has me at a stand still. They have a small savings just enough to make them ineligible for any kind of aid.
10 days ago
I have been taking care of my grandmother who has multipleedical issues including dementia and Parkinson's and don't know where else to turn she has taken everything out of me. I just got married last week and while I should be extactic I am exhausted and depressed. While my guys and is great I am just at my wits end with her mean selfish acts. I hope I don't sound like a horrible person but at being 23 I have taken on my grandmother full time given up my job, my house, my social life, and well my whole life. I don't know where to turn we've thought about putting her in a home but it is just such a hard decision to make. Honestly I'm lost I'm young and want to be starting a life, but I just feel burdened with hers.
24 days ago
My mother and I have been caring for my grandmother in my mother's home, I live right next door, for almost 3 years now. My grandfather passed away in early 2015 and she had been treated like a queen by himy for 62 years. We had to sell her house for financial and other reasons. She had mild dementia at times and is extremely selfish, demanding, unappreciative, narcissistic, rude and just flat out mean!! She broke her leg 3 weeks after my grandfather died and hasn't been able to walk since. Now she is completely bedridden. Which makes caring for her even more stressful. To the point where my mother and I can't stand to be around her except to care for her, we DO NOT neglect her needs! And have become resentful of having to cater to her. We have NO family to help, her other children were both killed in car accidents back in 2000 and 2002. So, there is literally no one else to help. She has too much income for home care assistance and we have hired private sitters and she pouts and won't eat. When we get back she is even meaner to us. I don't know how much more of this I can take!! It is literally destroying what little life I do have and the relationship with my children, my oldest daughter is a junior in college and my youngest daughter just graduated high school. Which I missed so many events because my grandmother is a needy witch! Help!! Any advice would be great!
27 days ago
Mom has been downright cruel and vicious to me since I was six years old. She told me recently I mean nothing to her. She never wanted me. Yet, she lives in my home (for free) (She has PLENTY of money. She's greedy and a user.) and thinks its just fine to use me. Two nursing homes and one hospital threw her out for being so nasty. If it were not for me, she'd be in a shelter somewhere. NO ONE wants her. Yes, my promiscuous, lying, conning sister received checks from mom weekly for 30 years. I got nothing. I put myself through college working three part time jobs and living on three hours of sleep to pay for it. I was hungry a lot. Ritz crackers go a long way. My sister bought jewelry, roses, steaks and perfume and bragged to me about it. She was "wanted". I'm not doing so well emotionally right now. Every time mom sees me, she's nasty to me. My name is stupid. Mom recently refused to sleep for five days. That was beyond description. Recently mom wanted my daughter's eyeglasses. She said no because she didn't want mom to break them. Mom hit and kicked my daughter over and over again while trying to get her glasses. It was finally the last straw. Either I call the police and have her arrested for child abuse or I call her doctor and leave it in his hands. He upped her Valium and promised that it would stop her violence. I told mom this is IT. I can still file a police report. Last episode mom threw her walker at my husband's beautiful truck. He swallowed really hard and walked away. He's a saint. I am wearing down from her emotional abuse every day. I'm on tranquilizers. My husband is on tranquilzers. All to deal with her. I have a serious question for all of you. Why? Why did she never want me and has been so cruel to me for 51 years? She refuses to tell me and then smirks. Please give me any of your thoughts, suspicions, ideas. You will not hurt my feelings. I really would like your thoughts. Thank you.
A fellow caregiver said...
27 days ago
After caring for my Mother for 7 1/2 years and right before she passed away, I became the total caregiver for her sister 84 yo and her mentally handicapped 64 yo daughter. Mother requested this. During this time I have had a heart attack and been diagnosed with leukemia. My mother was very agreeable. My aunt is not so at all and is very ill with her daughter who is also very disagreeable. My aunt has another daughter living out of state. She has been to see her mother 1 year and 8 months ago. She calls once or twice a month. My aunt had a knee replaced and is going to have the other done in approximately a month. Have I done my share of caregiving for someone who is unappreciative once the second knee is replaced? I think I am being used by the other daughter. I feel that it is time for her to take some responsibility. My husband feels that I should continue looking after them. Please feel free to ask any questions and please let me know how you feel. TIA
about 1 month ago
I am stuck caring for someone who is not a family member. We used to be in a relationship, he has dementia, lost his home, no job, no money and has been been denied disability benefits two times. I spend money for food, utilities have doubled, everything that comes along with being a caregiver with no extra money. I am at my wit's end,. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated
about 1 month ago
IN NEED OF HELP ..... MY NAME IS KARLA MY MOTHER AND BROTHER ARE DISABLED DO TO ME HELPING THEM HAD TO QUIT MY JOB PEOPLE HAVE TOLD ME I CAN GET PAY AS A CARETAKER JUST DNT KNOW WERE OR HOW IM IN CHICAGO ILL IF SOME ONE CAN PLEASE LET ME KNOW WEBSITE WERE I CAN ACTUALLY SEE THE APPLICATION THANK YOU...
about 1 month ago
I am 41 years old and I live at home with my parents. My mother is 71 and has frontal lobe dementia for the past six years.. My father and I are dealing with her on a daily basis. She goes to a daycare for about 4 hours three times a week. My father works from home and when he is upstairs working, I am my moms caregiver. I have been for about six years, while my father was living and working out of state. He moved back home when I begged him to because I noticed the changes in my mother and then she was diagnosed with Dementia. We have recently moved to a ranch level home so that my mother wouldn't fall and so that we can afford her care a little bit more to increase her time at daycare.After we moved, I started taking classes online to get myself prepared for employment. We both have the responsibility of taking care of her while both trying to juggle his work and me searching for work. I have a sister who lives not too far from us that works full time and comes over and helps when she wants to. We have avoided putting her in a home because we simply cannot afford. We can't get long term care insurance because she had a preexisting condition. I am at a loss about what to do. I would like to move on with my life and get a job so that I can be on my own, But my father needs help taking care of her, since he doesn't want to put her in assisted living. What do I do?
Load More Conversations