Heart & Stroke Support Group
Caring for a loved one with a heart condition or who's suffered a stroke? Get tips, advice, and support in this online support group for heart and stroke caregiving concerns.
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What's New Today
about 2 months
I need to vent. Where are my friends who could send a text or an email and ask how are YOU (me) doing? Do you need anything? Can I pick up or drop off anything for you? I've always tried to help when they've been in need or just to let them know I was thinking about them.
A friend has helped over the years and I always pay her. I sent her an email several days ago asking her about picking up some things. I was trying to reschedule since I had to cancel the last "appointment". Several days ago and no response. I sent her a text telling her that I had sent her an email about trying to reschedule. I also texted that she was the only one that I had to send a text to tell her I sent her an email.
She replies "Sorry, I've been busy." Really? Gee. I'm not. (sarcasm). I didn't say that but I thought it!
She frequently complains that her husband is only scheduled 1-3 days in a particular month to work. Her husband is 82, with some health issues. She cleans an apartment 2 times a month and does some sewing to bring some money in. She's 69. They have a mentally handicapped son (40) who lives with them. He works in a sheltered environment 5 days a week and has an active social life. He has a companion who takes him to dinner, or various social events. This gives his parents a lot of and needed breaks. The companion is paid for by the county in which we live.
Rant over. I'll deal with it.
about 2 months
Hubby still in rehab. Some things are better, some things are not. Anyone have advice regarding getting in-home help? I think the biggest needs will be to have someone clean him up on a daily basis, stay him with him periodically when I need to go out for an appointment (or just need a break!), and someone to set him up for treatment on his legs. He has to have "boots" put on both legs (toe to groin), then connect the boots to a machine. Once the machine is turned on, it will run for 3 hours and it does the work. When done, take boots off and disconnect machine. I went into a bit of detail, because I'm not sure what kind of person I would be looking for to do that. While he's been at rehab, the aides have been doing it (after I trained a couple of key people). I've been doing it for 6 1/2 years; my back would appreciate a break.
I came to ask for prayer for my late husbands brother he is in the hospital suffering a stoke, bleeding within his brain. It will be two years November 7 th and am reliving the suffering my husband went through the nine years after having a brain injury, I may be taking a flight to Arizona from sc to be there for them. I didn't sleep last night nor today knowing what my sister in law is going through, please keep her and my brother in law in your prayers. My prayers to all here. Thank you. Patti
My oldest surviving brother is in a nursing home facility in SC after suffering a devastating stroke and I live about 10 hours away. I've been keeping in contact wirh him. I just got back from a 10 day visit down there. I discovered his toe nails were very long and maybe affected by a fungus. He has been there almost 2 years. I feel as if they've been neglecting his health. After calling attention to this with the facility's administrator and his social worker and letting them know it was unacceptable they said they'd take him to podiatrist outside of the facility and cover the cost. Well they took him, but brought him back without being seen. They said due to insurance issues. I had left the day before to return home. I had made several phone calls to follow up with the administrator, with no response. The business manager did send me a message saying that he'd been rescheduled for Nov. 7th and assured me there should be no issues. I am beyond livid with that facility. I'm wondering if anyone else deals with similar situations and how do you handle it??? He cant get up without assistance and I also had to tell them he needed a bedside bath. Any ideas or suggestions grratly appreciated. Sorry for the book.
Do any of you have "unhelpful" instead of helpful children? My daughter supposedly came home to help me with her Dad. But every time he asks her to do something for him she acts like it is sooooo much trouble for her. I really wish she would just go away. She makes more work for me instead of less.
My husband was addicted to hydrocodone when he had his stroke. Afterwards I weaned him off of them, but since the mini strokes he has been in too much pain not to take them. My problem is that we fight all month about his dosage. He always wants more and usually badgers me until I give him more than he is supposed to get. Then, of course, he runs out before it's time for a refill. And that's a whole new mess of unwanted expenses, all the new hydrocodone laws.
If anyone could help id greatly appreciate it.
Let me give you alittle up to speed story on my heart health.... Since i was about 16 years old(now 21)... Ive had heart palpatations,anxiety, depression ect. I just chalked it up to be the events I was going through at the time found out it was sinus tachycardia and nearly died several times because of it(almost cardiac arrest).... For several years the palpatations went on now at 19 or 2o years old I find myself getting worse(and i mean i couldn't breath, sleep apnea ect.) so much so I went to the er 3 times before the dr told me what I had had and watching the heart monitor he told me it was "mitral valve prolapse." He did all he could to help me and reffered me to a cardiologist I waited too long to go this cardiologist because as by time i got to his office my chest felt like it was being crushed i was having trouble breathing, sweating ect. He did his check up and told me i had an abnormality and he gave me a sample med to try called "bistolic." And told me it would help me breath better and it did he gave me a two week prescription and took it as proscribed maybe a couple day from finishing the meds my body got used to the meds and they didnt help no more but i finished them... Never went back to him.... Then serval months later the chest pains shortness of breath ect. Returned with a vengeance went in a small walkin emergency clinic because i didnt think i was that bad to go the er and lo and behold the doc does his assesment of me and then hooks me up to an ekg (now mind you im laying flat on my back).. The tech does the test and quickly runs out of the room as if he found something i ask him "is everything ok?." He assures me that it is and i wait a few minutes for the doctor to come and he proceeds to tell me that i have left bundle branch block but you could barely see it and he said since i wasnt showing any sighns of high blood pressure he didnt give me anything to help since then (now 21) i went to a different cardiologist to get another opinion and we talked and eventually he set me up for a stress test and a electrocardiogram before the stress test he had me on a halter monitor and when the results came back he told me i had " extra heart beats." Ive been struggling off and on lately having extreme chest pains but now im just chalking it up to a fractured rib(which i dont how i got). I guess what im asking is does anyone think that either the mitral valve is back or still there and is quietly getting worse or is it the left bundle branch block thats come back or is still there and is getting worse? The only reason im concerened is that 3 of my family members ranging from 60-80 have died from severe cardiac arrest in the last 3ish years and both my parent have have pretty bad heart problems?
Thank you for taking time to read my post.. What should I do? The symptoms arnt too severe yet but im trying to catch them be for they get that way again.
An anonymous caregiver said...
It really irks me when a friend or family member asks how I'm doing or how I'm feeling (I care for my husband who has had a stroke), and then I tell them how I'm doing at that time, and if my answer is not - "I'm fine, doing okay" or something similar to that, then they downplay or are dismissive about what I say about how I am doing or feeling at that time. I know they mean well (I hope anyway) and at least they care enough to even ask. It makes me wonder why they even ask to begin with and what is really behind their being dismissive.
Some people only ask how my husband is doing, and tell us it's getting easier for us (as though they are the ones dealing day to day with it, and some will say I should get out by myself more now and have some time for myself (which I can not figure out how to do and so have just accepted it's not possible at this times anyway ... we can some days get out together even though it is usually an ordeal for us to do so) ... so I sometimes say - "so you will come stay with my husband for a few days or have him stay with you while I take a few days for myself?" Their look is like, well, no, and their response is nothing.
Some don't bother at all.
We also have a family member that will text about loving and missing us. So I say how they are welcome to come over (if they miss us) but then I hear nothing back. Another who says why don't you call (when they can themselves just pick up the phone and call if they want), etc.
Just so many irksome things like that which just makes me feel worse instead of more encouraged.
We thankfully do have one (elderly) family member that is very supportive and understanding. Very thankful for them and God and this place here.
My Husben been sent to hospital very low Bp with fever,. Come to find out the results of tests, infection in his blood, an What I understand about this infection if not taken care of u can die,, Thank God they caught it in time an He's no longer in danger. It's hard somethimes to stay calm in these situations, I lost it., so now We wait
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