about 8 years
how can I get my husband to agree he needs more help
You asked, "How to I get my husband to agree that he needs more care than I can give him. I am really lucky in that we can afford to have someone come in and do some caregiving, but he is convinced that only I can do what he needs. He has parkinson's disease, is blind in one eye: he can walk, but wobbles and often needs a steadying hand. I could use some help in showering, and just to have some time without constantly listening if there is a fall, or a call to help him get up from the toilet. There is a large community help center here that screens people and can give you a suggestion on who to interview. I have found a few, one who loves to cook, one who is a nurse, and another who is a man, who speaks my husband's native tongue. But H retires to his bedroom when someone comes exclaiming "I don't need anyone.". When that happens I feel guilty and angry: guilty because I think maybe he is right, angry because I know he is not right and I need a respite. I have spoken with him about this, asking if he would like to interview people, help decide who does what, but he just turns away. Yes, I know depression can be one cause and the failure to accept his situation is a way of not having to deal with it. But any suggestions or ideas would be very helpful."