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Does death hurt?

46 answers | Last updated: Jul 03, 2015
An anonymous caregiver asked...

Does death hurt?


5% helpful
yusraipek answered...

Death of every person differs as a "physical and spiritual experience" from that of the others according to how good/bad that person was at his life. If that person was See also:
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a thief, for example, an addict, and/or have illegal love affairs with women other than his own legal wife; also those women who share their body with a multiple groups of men in illegal relationships and all other illegal and immoral behaviours could rest the specific person on the "adequate" deathbed! Whether that deathbed he experiences was a cold sponge or a heated pan!. We must be good to ourselves by also being good to others. We must not hurt others either by our words or acts. People must always be safe from our bad deeds. And why bad deeds at all?! We must spread the culture of peace among us in order to ensure that our bodies would, as well, rest in peace at its final end.


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An anonymous caregiver answered...

Death is a "letting go" of life. It is a release. There may be pain associated with the cause of death, depending upon the cause. But death itself is a painless letting go. At the time of death the body produces endorphins which actually produce a feeling of happiness, or even euphoria. It appears as though Nature (or God) created our bodies to end life as pain-free as possible.


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An anonymous caregiver answered...

I think death can be a gift from God for someone who has suffered a long and painful illness. It is we who are left on this earth who have the pain of grief and loneliness over the loss of our loved one on this earth.


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flour sack baby answered...

I had left the room and my mom died while I was gone. I had promised she would go from my hands to Eddie's. He is my brother who was murdered at 18,38 years ago. My sister held one hand and my other brother the other one. My teenaged nephew was there also. I wanted to see when she went if she seemed to recognize someone, I wanted to know that she went safely and wasn't scared. I can't grill them for the details, but my sister said she hopes there is life after death, because she was scared to death. One day years later, I was making the bed, standing on my husbands side. I tucked the covers in, and turned around, and she was standing there, and then she was gone. I looked in her eyes, I know she was there, she always told me if she could come back and see me she would. I don't know if I can believe my own eyes or not. I just wish she would have waited for me. I miss her so much. I think maybe it is the living who feel the most pain.


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Upon your last breath,you see yourself leave your physical body,and you rise above,but in front of the faces looking down at you. It's hard to describe,but it is wonderful to be totally free free from all the pain of life. There is no more darkness,there is only light and all those people you once knew standing behind you,watching you as you progress into their new existence,which is very,very unique and beautiful. I can't tell you all of the good stuff,I can only say you won't believe it at first,but when you really fall into the life ever lasting you will know that we were never forgotten,and that life is just beginning with a very nice twist to it. Please,Please believe me your life on earth was just a blink of an eye,and I know you won't understand until you really die from here,and go to this divine NEW WORLD with so much love and beauty. Enough said,live your life as if you were never here.

Sincerely, Dean Wiegert United States


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LorXena answered...

It seems that only someone who had experienced death can answer that; and, then their answer could only reflect their own personal experience. It seems logical that each person will have their own unique experience when their time comes to die.

While I've not yet truly died, I've almost died three times. Each time I felt some level of pain, but nothing more than I could handle... and then the pain subsided as my brain began to hallucinate. While I still felt pain, it didn't bother me as much. You see, during those moments before I was brought back from the brink of death, I was only vaguely aware of my surroundings... my hallucinations captured my interest instead of all the frantic business happening around me and I remember feeling OK with passing away.

In only one instance did I feel completely outside of my body, I was told that I had lost consciousness from severe blood loss and oxygen deprivation to my brain, but it seemed to me that I was conscious... watching what was happening to my body from a nearby view point. But, I was not in any way feeling anxious or upset; in fact I had no compulsion to return to my body... I remember feeling as if I was free. This particular instance was when I was bleeding to death. I had lost so much blood that I required 6 units of whole blood and 4 more units of plasma. I am a small person and am told that I probably cannot hold anymore than 7 units total. (I'm 5'4" and weight about 107 lbs)

It took some time to get the artery in my liver to stop bleeding and to stabilize my heart and oxygen levels. But I do remember the very moment I 'returned' to my body and regained consciousness... I remember that I cried like a baby because I was in unbearable pain. For the next couple weeks while I healed, I had wished that I had died. Of course, now I am glad to still be alive.

The other two times I was in the process of losing consciousness, but never fully did and never felt like I 'left' my body, instead I had visitations from people that no one else saw or acknowledged... perhaps I dreamed them up like when you are having a realistic dream just before it is time to wake up from a full night's sleep.

In both those cases, I was in pain, but I don't remember it being intolerable, just annoying and uncomfortable. I remember feeling like it was difficult to breathe and I was aware that my heart was beating very rapidly, but faintly, weakly. I was not scared of dying in any of these experiences. I accepted whatever would happen next. I remember feeling pity for my husband and an overwhelming love for him... so I tried hard to hold on for him and our children.

I think it does to hurt to die in the beginning of the process, but once your mind accepts the fact that you are actively dying, that your organs (including your brain) are shutting down, it ignores the pain and it isn't so bad. Maybe someone else could tell about their personal experience with recovering from the brink of actual death.

We can never know what someone else's death feels like to them, we can only guess from how they look and behave while they are dying, but how can we truly know if they are hurting or not.


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Marly26 answered...

Just as we come into this life with love and warmth, this is the way we go out. God doesnt' allow those to suffer while leaving the earths' plane. It is a peaceful leaving. When my mother passed away, I seen her prior to going to the crematorium, I never felt so at peace just looking at her, holding her hand. I know she was already gone but the look of happiness on her face said it all. She was medicinally ill prior to her leaving, and I seen that pain and suffering, however again when I seen her later it left me with a peace of my own knowing that she herself was in peace. RIP Mom


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Lara7 answered...

I just finished reading, "Heaven is Real" a story of a three and a half year old who had gone to Heaven. Would suggest anyone afraid should read it. It is a precious story. My confidence is in the Lord and have almost died twice seriously. I had such peace - that's what it is all about. I didn't enjoy what I went through medically as it was painful, but I had complete peace whether I lived or died it didn't matter to me.


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Janet Beeching answered...

All I can add is what was told to me by my great-aunt. Annie saw me crying at her bedside, and she told me that I should not cry for her, as only the living are afraid of dying, the dying are not afraid. Later that day, she left us peacefully, and aware of us, and her late son, Walter, who died in his teens. She seemed to take his hand, and told us that Walter said it was time to go, and her monitor flat-lined just moments later, she was 89. I still miss her, but she had peace, and she was with her beloved son. If it was only endorphins, I don't know, but I'd rather think it was just how she state it to us. Janet Beeching


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dls57 answered...

I have been on the brink of dying. At first I struggled with death. Then I just felt calm and accepting of what was so close. Even now, several years later, I feel the sense of quiet and peace. However my father-in-law died of Alzheimers and he was in pain. The nurse was very attentive and gave him a small amount of medication to make it easier for him. To see him calm down and quietly slip away without any pain made it easier for him. Still it was very sad, as death is an enemy. It is the result of Adam and Eve choosing to sin. Thank goodness we will have another chance through the resurrection to life on earth in a paradise for billions of mankind. I know I will see this sweet soul again.


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short fuse answered...

I was doing clinical at the hospital while I was in nursing school and one of the other students had a patient that was dying and it scared her to death. She ask me if I would stay with her and I did. I can tell you what I felt in that room when the lady died. I felt as if the room filled up with pressure so much pressure that my ears hurt, I could feel an upward pull on my face and skin but at the same time very calm and peacefully, I felt happiness in the room. The pressure in the room rose up to the ceiling and felt like it floated out the windows upward and everything I felt was gone. I believe the lady’s soul left her body and went to peace and happiness and she was glad to go.


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dls57 answered...

I believe in the resurrection. Instead of going to heaven, we are asleep awaiting for God's time to raise the dead. Remember Jesus said regarding Lazarus, "He is sleeping". Does it seem likely that Jesus brought him to life taking him from heaven? If we are immediately raised to life, what need is there to have a time "when all will come out of the memorial tombs"? Death can be quiet, just a slipping away. It can be loud and painful. Either way death can be a release from whatever our ills are. Whether we are in a paradise earth or chosen for heaven, "the former will not come to mind". That is my comfort whenever I lose someone.


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An anonymous caregiver answered...

Harbey,your certainly a critic,and that is quite OK,your still loved and will be watched over even if you are a sceptic.


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harveycritic answered...

anonymous: You might be making an unfair assumption that I'm not religious. All I'm implying is that the Bible need not be interpreted literally. I suspect that the majority of religious people are in that camp. I do not believe we have a common ancestor in Adam and Eve. However this does not mean that I'm an atheist, only a believer in interpreting the Bible as metaphor.


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Laylaj answered...

I am not sure if dying hurts or not, since I have not experienced it. I did, however, experience seeing the death of my brother, Jim, who had advanced lung cancer. His wish, after he became so ill, was to be with family when he died. After he left the hospital, he came to stay with my husband and I. The nurse Ruth (I call her my angel) would come and visit, and one day she said, "It's close". We had another scheduled visit at 2:00 p.m. that Monday, but she called to see if she could come at 8:30 a.m. I told her "I think this is the day," and we sat with my brother, along with a chaplain. I called my mother and my husband, and we were all there with him, while he lay there, eyes half open, staring off somewhere, as if he were looking at something or someone. As he took one long breath, we waited, and then there was no more. His passing, it seemed to me was peaceful and serene. I miss him every day, but know his pain and suffering are gone--it's just those that are left to greive that have the heartache.


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the kingbird answered...

I don't want to bore you with another same old story, but I will make it as quick as I can. I was only 25 years old, in the hospital for blood clots in my lungs and some free floating. It was decided to do an experimental surgery to try to keep me alive. On the way to the operating room, my heart stopped beating!, I was wheeled on in and put on the table. Since I was already "dead" they opened me immediately to try to move the clot out of my heart, with no anesthetic. I was, by this time "out of body", floating above and watching what they were doing to my body. At that time someone took me away and we proceeded up a hallway out of darkness toward a very bright light showing at the end of that tunnel.

Suddently my escort stopped and started taking me back down the hall, telling me that I had to go back, this would not be the time. Soon I became aware of being back in my body and the terriable pain that I was feeling until the doctors got me medicated or what ever they did to stop the extreme pain for that moment. I can tell you this for sure, I was probably the most angry person in the world at that time, I was brought back to all that pain and I was feeling no pain where I was, I wanted to go back, but couldn't. The Lord works in mysterious ways, don't he?


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Deav Domino answered...

I was mugged in broadday light. This guy after taking my wallet jammed a knife into my gut and left me to die on a back alley. At first it was pure pain, extreme, but, then it felt good. I felt good and was seriously ready to accept my fate and head into non-existence proudly. I remember feeling nothing but pleasure, and then suddenly waking up. I'm an atheist so when i woke up and saw my ex-wife staring me in the face i swore I had died and gone to hell. I hated her, she betrayed me, screwed me over and ruined my life, so as you can imagine I hated her. But she was there along with my family and friends.

I miss that feeling. I loved that feeling so much I turned to drugs to cope with the pain and even heroin couldn't come near it. I seeped into a huge depression and tried to kill myself. I jumped in front of a car to kill myself. the pain and then the pleasure and then i woke up. My family was there. The doctor said he didn't think i would make it, I should have died i was beyond lucky to have survived.

I broke my back, and my neck was damaged, most the bones in my chest were broken, my arms and legs were broke and i had severe internal injury and brain damage. They said I never would walk again, but, yet here I am walking


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An anonymous caregiver answered...

The Bible says absent with the body present with the Lord if you are saved.


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An anonymous caregiver answered...

I believe that there is no "death" as we know it...only a momentary transition from life to Life Everlasting. It's probably like falling asleep. I know I'll see my parents and grandparents again, and get to meet the grandfather I never knew. Lastly, I will finally get to meet "the other"...someone who crossed over many, many years ago. I will finally be able to tell him that he mattered, and why.


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svega answered...

Isn't there anyone here who can give a more reliable, scientific answer? Must we have all these so-called "answers" that are suppositions of the Bible? It is a simple question that I am sure a medical doctor could answer: "Does death HURT"? This is a question that refers to the physical condition of a person as their bodies physiologically break down. It is not a reference to one's relationship with a 'god' (as the "anonymous caregiver" continues to preach). I had a boyfriend whose mother died of Alzheimer's disease when she was 92. Her son, who is a registered nurse, was by her side to the end. He said that the physical "shutting down" of the organs DOES hurt. It is painful when the organs stop working. That is why the key to a relatively "peaceful death" is pain killers. I saw my grandfather die. He too had Alzheimer's and was a very "moral" and good man. However, as his body shut down and his organs failed, no amount of his good deeds on earth could ameliorate his pain. He cried, he moaned incessantly and quite loudly (something Grandpa would never have done since he was such a man of dignity) until the hospice finally adminstered him morphine. It was only then that his pain stopped and he died without any cries or moaning.

It is a medical fact that dying DOES hurt insofar as the body's shutting down results in pain. Consider when one is suffering from kidney failure. That HURTS! Now imagine ALL of your organs failing at once. If it were as easy as just being in the graces of God, then I am sure a lot of good people would have NOT needed morphine in the end. The fact of the matter is, many people dying of terminal illnesses DO need the help of pain killers. We are only flesh and blood.


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svega answered...

I wish to amend the person's name I quoted above. It was NOT "anonymous caregive" I was critiquing, but "yusraepik". I apologize "anonymous caregiver" for the mistake.


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tldavis0824 answered...

I cant wait to see my best friend who I lost in 1995.

My answer to this is: Wouldnt it depend on what you die of???

Peacefully in your sleep, or a drive-by shooting in the head???

PS I am catholic


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Zinnia answered...

This is not exactly a scientific answer, but it might depend on the cause of illness. In my case, I went into septic shock and was in a lot of pain similar to what leg cramps or foot cramps feel like, but it was all over. This may have been due to my organs starting to fail or for some other reason, who knows. It's really hard to explain, but I was aware of certain functions "winking out" and the last thing to go was my hearing. At some point between my respiratory system and my hearing fading away I realized I didn't feel pain anymore and knew I was dying, but it was almost like an afterthought, secondary to the realization I wasn't hurting anymore.

The cramping in my chest, stomach, throat, and kidneys was incredibly painful, I'll be quite honest, and I just wanted it to stop, and it was strange to hear the medics say they were losing me but I was unable to respond in any way. I hope this helps answer your question in some way.


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horten answered...

I saw my mother dying for 15 days. At one moment she said to me, "It is over" How does she knew? But she knew. She only hurt when she was moving, she will moan a little big, other than that she was confortable and in peace. I believe my mother saw my dad before she die. She was looking ahead and named his name. I believe that death is a transition to a new life with our Lord! And yes, there is another world, better place waiting for all of us and I am sorry for the one who wants a "scientific answer" and do not believe that there is another place. Either is a good place or a bad place, but it sure is "another place" Does dying hurt? it all depends, but one thing I know seing many people dying, once that you accept that you are dying, there is no more pain!


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docdewitt answered...

As a physician, I have a few things to add. Kidney failure is definitely calm; as the toxins build up the body relaxes and the mind drifts off - for short instants initially, becoming longer and longer. Eventually, the patient does not reawaken. Lots of stuff under "google" or search on the white light at the end of the tunner being a normal physiologic response to low oxygen levels. That is a nice touch! Finally, I will add that many times I have heard that anxiousness can delay a peacful death, people get too wound up to allow themselves to pass. Hospice workers and those who halp care for the actively dying often report that a sponge bath can frequently relax a patient enough to allow them to let go. I hope I am aware of my death, or entry into actively dying state. I wonder what I should say as my last words, or if I should reheurse the event? (Yes, I am type A) I don't believe in an after life, and so will likely be sad to leave what I view as my one life on earth. I have a strong sense of fairness, and since every human has to share in this event, I guess I cannot complain. Carpe dieum, all.


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svega answered...

I appreciate the doctor's feedback on this board. That is what I wanted to hear, namely a scientific explanation. I know that the alleged white light has nothing to do with heaven or angelic beings. It is, as the doctor said, a physiologic phenomenon. But here is some food for thought for some of those who insist on the spirituality of this white light- a pastor I used to know said that people ought to be wary of "lights" if they think they seem them in near death experiences because the devil is known as an 'angel of light' and is very deceptive. That will make you stop and think; not everything is quite as it seems.


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horten answered...

I believe this question is more spiritual than physical. How do Doctors know if it hurts or not? Doctors are more limited that what you think. They don't have all the answers. People hurt physically if they are not taking care of, and the illness (like cancer) is one that hurts. My mother was dying for 15 days in agony (agony for us). She did not know what was going on. She got Alzheimer, but always knew who she was and was able to name all her six children. She hurts when we she was touch, she was very fragile, but she was hurting before she was dying also. As i said before I believe with all my heart that dying is more spiritual than physical. You are having a confrontation with your creator, you are dealing with him (as many experiences I had heard) and while you are doing that, there is not much time for pain, unless there is not pain killers or whatever they use (morphine) to be given to the dying person. I also think that there is not a scientific explanation, death as well as life belongs to the Lord. I am sorry for you that don't believe. people that don't believe struggles a lot with this subject when it is so easy if you know the word of God. There is a light!! and there is darkness also, I hear many, many people talk about it, there are books out there of testimonies of people that once died for a few minutes and have experiences. Even when the devil is called "angel of light" there is no light on him! There is a book called "90 minutes in Heaven" by Don Piper, I strongly recommended you to read it. It is a true experience. There are answers there that might help you, but, you need to believe! Nothing is going to help you if you don't believe.
My mother was given morphine and she died peacefully. We were the ones suffering and have to let her go! Every time one of us cried, she cried in silence, tears will roll down. The nurses told us not to cry in front of her, then she stop. If you tell the person who is dying that is okay and that he/she can go, it will happens soon, otherwise the person will hold on until everybody tells him/her that is okay to go. That was my own experience. I hope it helps some one, specially you sweetheart.


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svega answered...

Dear Horten, You are mistakenly ASSUMING that I am not a spiritual person. This is why I really despise so-called religious and alleged "spiritual" people. The truth is that NO ONE can judge another's spirituality! I do believe that God made us as physical beings and as such, we are finite and therefore subject to all the limitations and pains that come with the body's death process. God IS a scientist after all. Look at the universe. Look at us biologically and physiologically. I don't know that I would ever trust someone's published memoir of their so-called death experience. I trust in God and I am fully aware that insofar as death was never meant to be (in God's plan) then it seems that of course, the death process would hurt just like it hurts when we are sick with an illness or disease, whether terminal or not. Our bodies respond with pain because pain is a defense mechanism. It is something built in to us as physical beings. I do also believe that we 'let go' when we know it is safe or okay to do so. Only then can we die.


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Zinnia answered...

If my prior experience counts for anything, if I am dying from an illness I won't hesitate to look to palliative care! Oddly enough, I came away with 2 things from my close call: 1) There was no bright light, nor angels, nor demons trying to grab me, nor anything of the sort. There was nothing. 2) Although I fear being in a persistent vegetative state or having a slow, lingering, painful death, I no longer fear death itself. That is a wonderful thing, in my opinion!

Christopher Hitchens had written that he wanted to face death head on and wide awake, but I have no such compunction to do the same. When it is my time to go, I want to be as comfortable as possible, and want my family to honor my wishes and let me go.


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svega answered...

Of course, no one can ever know definitively, but I tend to believe that people see what they want or hope to see. However, I have a friend who was with her mother-in-law when she died. I knew this woman very well; I was engaged at the time to her son. When she died my friend told me that her mother-in-law claimed to see angels around my friend. As the angels disappeared, the mother-in-law panicked and started exclaiming, "Where are they taking me. Don't let them take me, please!" Quite sobering and thought provoking indeed! It scared me and made me stop and reflect! I would like to think that as we go, we slip into nothingness....sleep forever. I don't know if I can stand remaining on the sidelines watching my children make their way through life when I cannot be there. THAT would be hell.


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garof answered...

I'm not quite sure why I started reading all these comments, most of which seem nothing more than heartfelt while wishful personal beliefs, except that I am about to go through the death experience with my 88 year old father-in-law, who looks to me to protect him from having to depart early, even though he suffers for his wishes to postpone his unknown. And, try as I may, I can't give his astonishingly aware and perceptive mind any relief at all from his fear of death. All the clichés about a wonderful place there will be, or an end to his pain, only hurt him because he thinks I, the last person, has given up on him and his wish to battle on for a while more. His suffering, and the visual failings, that are normally enough to quickly defeat the spirit"¦the desire to hold on, just don't seem to push him through the denial stage. His decline does however, cause me considerable grief to see, while we struggle between authorizing another minimally prolonging, even if miraculous treatment, or super effort by the doctors, or to focus all our efforts on convincing him it is finally time to quit the battle and give in to hospice. What is the right answer when the body ceases to function in so many ways, yet the mind unreasonably is alert and just refuses to accept that the body won't/can't can't function much longer"¦. Probably a rhetorical question as I am doubting there is a good answer. I guess I'm just releasing some by responding here, but I did find some rare and bright insights in reading some of these comments. First is svega's reckoning of one type of Hell. I have long felt that observation from the sidelines would have to just be the pits. It may be just me, but I can't imagine watching (let alone enjoying) the love of my life loving another"¦..even if, on this side, that's what I think I want her to do when the time comes. Also, I want all the comfort and probably the speed I can get when it is my time, with the same wishes to be let go that Zinnia expressed.
FYI though for some of you, I do believe in an afterlife, but only because I have been lucky enough to have personally witnessed a small miracle physically demonstrating its existence, and I have come to believe there are miracles to be seen for those that will"¦. regards.


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svega answered...

Dear garof, I understand your feelings completely. We endured the same with my grandfather. It was a feeling of helplessness to watch him suffer through the debilitating stages of Alzheimers disease toward the end. His body and his ability to even swallow had vanquished and he was in extreme pain. Finally my aunt told hospice to make his inevitable passing bearable. They did. They administered serious pain killers like morphine and phenagin (not spelled right) for the nausea. In the end, he was quiet, no more agonizing groaning and screams from him. He died apparently peacefully (or so it seemed to us). Death does indeed hurt which is why I started reading and participating on this board in the first place. All the discussion about it depending on what kind of a person you were in life or what lay beyond just doesn't match the diseases people ultimately die from. Cancer, Alzheimers for example are painful diseases regardless. I said before in another post that we are flesh and blood, physical and finite beings, subject to the breaking down of our bodies which is anathema to "life" so naturally it hurts. The best we can do for our loved ones and instruct our loved ones to do for us is to make the process as painless as possible. In the end, I believe it is probably more associated with our outlook on leaving people behind. That prospect really pains me to no end. I hate the thought of leaving behind my boys. My kids will probably have to do a lot of convincing that it is okay for me to let go and accept death regardless of what is beyond. I believe that is what pains the heart of those who know they are dying. We just have to convince them that we will be fine and in fact we will do even better than fine. These responses are only subjective as you know. None of us can ever say what really goes through the mind of a dying person.


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Queenofone answered...

When I was a girl I thought about spirituality, god and the physical being a lot. I heard a lot of different theories and religious teachings, and decided that the things I heard supported only two conclusions: If there is afterlife, odds seem quite good that it will be wonderful and interesting. If there is nothing - when we die, we will be dead - and not know about it, and so it will not matter. The only problem that I see is that our desire to preserve ourselves stops us from accepting the idea of a final ending, and not knowing for sure often causes suffering and uncertainty.

We can't know until we are there of course, but I personally feel sure that all the energy of our living soul does not just stop. In physics, the facts simply don't support stuff just disappearing. When we die, the body composition may change, but the matter is not lost. It becomes soil, dust, flowers, grass, etc. It is reborn as something else. Why should our spirit energy be any different? You do not have to believe in God or anything else to accept that living energy exists. The spark of life just is, in much the same way as matter, physical energy or gravity. Our forms may not resemble what we once were, but we continue. It explains much about the world that seems unexplainable.

But back to the topic of pain and death. Since a near-death experience, I am not afraid of death. I feel a little apprehensive about how I will die, but that is different. As others have said, the dying person's experience depends a lot upon on their condition, mentally and physically.

It seems, however, that the body is designed to give us an inherently peaceful passing. It is not designed to hurt, but it is up to us to work with our bodies. We can greatly aid ourselves and others in passing just by being aware of what we can do and how we think about it. Energy is everything, all around us, in us, and with us at all times. It is not just available to those who are super religious or special in some way. We all have access every moment of the day to healing light and energy, if we are willing to be open to it. It can help ease the pain of passing for both the living and the dying, by being open to the form it takes. For some it might be telling us we need to tell our loved one they can move on. For another it might take the form of letting yourself relax enough to understand that death is not the enemy. Some know how to manifest healing or light energy through their bodies. However it lives within you, it can be part of making death more peaceful and meaningful.

We are so lucky to have so many resources at our fingertips, as well as hospices and modern medicine, I feel the final fight is to stop ourselves from fearing the process of death.


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lauradee123 answered...

My dad died due to serious internal brain damage after falling down a set of stairs arfter reading a statment it says that he was making grunting noises and was still breathing at the time it kills me inside to think he would have felt any pain its been 10 years since his death and I still crnt get it out my mind if he would of been in pain could anyone answer this thanks


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J ann answered...

In this matter I am unsure, as all of you. Of course we dont know, thus the fear. The body is made to feel pain to alert us of injury, illness, ect. Of course something will hurt. But does it hurt as much as we expect it would?
Where I am going with this... I asked a pastor during a discussion about the goodness of God this question; If God is good, then why did He flood the earth during Noah's time? Not all the people were evil. What about the children? They drowned. How terrible! Why would God do this?" His answer was "What makes you think the children suffered? What it appears to be may not be the way it really is. How do you know that God didnt release the children from their bodies before they felt themselves not being able to breath under water? Have faith that God is THERE and is taking care of his children." I pondered this for months. He was correct. What may appear to be pain and suffering may not be what is happening. I guess we just have to believe that God will be there to give us relief and comfort. I am also torn between being absent from the body, present with the Lord, and "sleeping" until resurrection. Which is it? I havent read my bible in years, I admit. However, I seem to recall something about our BODIES being lifted from the grave to be made whole with our spirit. Am I way off on that? Do we rise to meet our spirit and be made whole again? To those who dont believe in life after death, I would say yes, in most cases I imagine there is discomfort in dying. Those fortunate to die instantly in an accident would escape the shutting down of the body. I've witnessed death. In my Aunt's case she simply slowed down the breathing in unconsciousness until she breathed no more. The last thing she said prior to be unconscience was "I just want to go with my God". Funny thing is, SHE DIDNT BELIEVE IN GOD. THAT has never left my memory. How odd is that?
Being born is painful they say. I imagine it is terrible for an infant. Dying must be pretty uncomfortable as well. But like childbirth, it passes and is forgotten. I am hoping it doesnt last too many minutes. My Dad wont be with us much longer.


Bigmamasgirl answered...

I lost my 84yr old grandmother last November (2012). I flew in three days before she passed. She did not have cancer and two weeks prior she was admitted to the hospital for some internal bleeding. I understand that her organs were shutting down. She had not opened her eyes since leaving the hospital, and I believe she couldn't because she was too weak, but her brain was still active. When I arrived at her bedside (she was brought home the week prior) and begin speaking to her she begin moving her hands violently and moaning, I instantly knew she recognized my voice and understood what I was saying. She would blink her eyes but could not open them. I could put a sponge to moisten her tongue and she would clamp her mouth down on it, so I know she was experiencing thirst. The night before she died, (we were giving her a sponge bath) we noticed her skin was deteriorating from just hours before, it looked liked if we touched her legs that they would start to bleed, so we put a special cream on the hospice lady gave us. (I imagine that was painful) She began flailing and moaning, not too dramatic, just enough to alarm us and we decided to give her the morphine prescribed, she calmed. Later that night the whole family was singing around her bed, and I noticed tears coming from her eyes. I wiped her eyes thinking it was just her eyes watering, but then they kept coming, then I knew she was crying. I think now she must have been in some pain, my uncle gave her a half of a morphine pill crushed and placed on her tongue. When we checked on her 3hrs later she had passed away. After reading all the posts above, I believe when organs start to shut down, it is painful ( and her brain was still active to register the pain), so administer meds, and let them go comfortably.


An anonymous caregiver answered...

Death is probably the most beautiful thing in the world. For those who say that they have died and come back from the edge of life and talk about the "light at the end of the tunnel", that wasn't what I experienced. My experience certainly made me rethink spirituality, as I lived most of my life as a proud atheist. Let me tell you what I know from my own experience. I passed away three years ago after a really bad car crash. Although my friend and I had our seatbelts on, only I made it. I had lost a lot of blood from the wounds I had received through the whole thing. I was pronounced dead at the scene, yet I remember the entire thing so vividly. The car had flipped twice, we screamed and braced ourselves, and then I heard not one but two "pops." The first pop was my best friend's neck breaking against the side of the door... The second pop was the side of my head hitting the passenger window, my skull breaking at impact. That was the moment I had "passed." I suddenly found myself looking at the wreck. I felt nothing, nor did I have a "body." I finally realized that I was looking at myself in the car and so I looked down at my body and I was this beautiful, faint, light-blue orb. I finally realized that this was it. This was the end of me. I had so much left to experience in life yet I didn't feel sad. You feel neutral, completely void of pain, anger, sadness, etc. The land around me began to morph and everything turned to black. The summer heat had disappeared, and suddenly I felt cold, but in the best way possible. I looked down and found myself standing on a platform directly over the Milky Way. I had become one with the universe. I began to descend into the heart of the Milky Way, into a black hole. It wasn't scary, though. My descension was forced. I watched my new body break into millions of pieces, like little pieces of embers sparking from a fire into the air. I was entering the unknown. Everything began to spin around me and I found myself finally "letting go." I found myself on the other side at this point, looking back at the black hole, and the darkness suddenly turned into a giant screen. There was this black giant in Royal Blue robes standing beside the screen, holding a giant book. My entire life played out across the black hole--the good, bad, and the ugly. I asked him what he was doing, and he told me that he was "weighing my warmth." He tallied up the good and bad in my life and wrote it down. He smiled and said "Very well. Welcome aboard the Tao." The platform I was standing on disappeared and the view of space turned into a garden. The colors were so vivid. There were clear, sunny skies. The sky was so incredibly blue, I began wading through this river, making my way to the other side. On the other side, I saw a cobblestone pathway leading to the city. The towers were like something out of The Lord of The Rings movies... Elegant, worn, white, and just so bright. The entire city had a glow to it from afar. I made my way to the gates and was greeted by my friend who had passed in the wreck, he smiled at me, dressed in a white gown, and embraced me. "You made it. How about that" were his words as he and I were suddenly surrounded by thousands upon thousands of others, people of different races, ages, height and weight. I was in heaven. It was like walking through Venice or something. The buildings were so tall. We made our way through the city and arrived at what I can only describe as the Pantheon, just cleaner. We made our way into the packed building, and then I saw the Gods. All of the different Gods that we worship here on Earth were sitting together under the same roof. There were two giants on either side of the room, guarding them. One of the giants looked at me and stooped down, saying something to the Gods. They all looked my way and all the chattering stopped. All eyes in that room fell on me. Jesus stood up and began making his way through the crowd towards me. He embraced me and said "you aren't supposed to be here yet. You must leave now." Jesus took his 1st and 2nd finger and zapped my forehead. Every time he did it, I heard thunder and felt a searing pain across my body. I cried out and He quietly shh'd me like a baby. I began to feel myself morph along with the environment. "That's it... Shhh deep breaths." I was being forced back into existence, and that was the most painful feeling ever. I was literally being born again into the world, back into my lifeless body, feeling every wound inflicted on my body from the crash. I opened my eyes 8 months later in the hospital, surrounded by mine and Brad's family, teary eyed and silent. I know this all sounds stupid, but this is what I experienced. Every religion, every God will take us to the same place. There are no tunnels, nor lights at the end of them, no horses, no mansions, no Hell. We are all purified through our revision of the lives we led and then born into Heaven. Death is not painful. It's the process of having to go back to life that hurts the most.


100% helpful
JP Davis answered...

I hope this helps. In 1998 I had an experience with what I believe to have been a near-death experience. I was, at the time, suffering from a leg infection; my doctor, vacillating between hospitalization ––––and sending me home ( I was uninsured at the time), opted to send me home. He did, however, prescribe for me a powerful series of oral antibiotics; then, made me promise to follow-up. Of course, I was frightened sufficiently enough to make sure I had those prescriptions filled, and subsequently, began the treatments as prescribed. But almost immediately, I began to develop side effects; and, because I had become more concerned with losing my leg, and had come to understand that some side-effects were to be expected, I let it go. The idea of me losing my leg, or having to endure an expensive hospitalization, had, I guess for me –––sealed the deal... By the 5th day, I was having a particularly difficult time breathing, more than what I had been accustomed to. But because I saw positive results in regard to the leg infection, and the doctor's two-day wound check had met with his approval, again, I let it go... But that night, tired, and weakened, my breathing now shallow, and wheezy, I went to sleep. And here is where it gets interesting …I remember, at one point gasping for air, trying, with all my might, –––to sit up. –––But I couldn't … Then, I found myself out of my body, but it was strange, because it also felt as if I had just woken up. And I remember, walking around the living room, trying, to catch my bearing. But something felt different, weird, and it wasn't a dream.... Our living room had a lot of windows, and through them began to shine the Brightest light; at first I thought someone had pulled up into my driveway, but quickly I realized that the light was far too bright Far too warm; so warm, so beautiful the light that I was drawn to the door, and moved through it. In retrospect, it seemed odd that I would do such a thing, for my neighborhood was not exactly the greatest at the time, and for me to react so "cavalier,'' ––– unafraid, was out of character for my normal conscious self. But I kept moving forward, anyway, drawn into the light. Now, I know the original question to this vine was, do we feel pain during death? And I can tell you, at least from my own humble experience, I felt none. I did, however feel for some moments a great deal of anxiety, but I attribute that to the inability for me to take a breath.... … After I began to walk into that light, I can only to tell you that I had never felt ––––nor have I ever since ––––anything So beautiful; so warm. A light that can only be described as Pure Love; now, I know some of you might be saying to yourself, "This guy was religious, he had to be..." But you'd be wrong, I at the time was only 25, a hard-charging former member of the military who, was then, attending college full-time, and someone who gave religion or spirituality, hardly any thought... But I had to admit, after being enveloped in that wondrous Light, I knew there was something more, I could feel it all around me, inside of me, too. And here is where it gets stranger, still. The light began to swirl around me, like a gentle tornado and I began to be lifted. And as I rose I could make out my house, the roof, the tops of trees. And in the middle of my street, I thought I saw a pyramid composed of that light, at least, that's what it looked like... The next thing that happened was completely amazing... It was, now that I've had some space to consider the possibilities, what appeared to be a life review. I won't get into the details of what mine were like, but I will say that my best friend growing up was involved in it; and we were small, and beautiful. Later, two more scenes played out, of later years... But the most powerful aspect of my experience, was at the end of the review, where I was led to the end of a long long line … of people. So many, that I would go as far to say that the line stretched deep into the horizon; and I knew, it was important... But the line moved quickly, this was No DMV line. And I want to make clear, right now, that I'm no zealot, I'm no preacher, but I do want to tell the truth … And that truth is that before me, stood a man, so filled with light so full of love and compassion, that I began to weep, and no words, could escape my mouth. Even as I'm writing this sharing it for the first time, my eyes are wet. I didn't want to let that being of pure love go, but me staying there wasn't meant to be and I felt myself once again being lifted, into the gentle light, into a winding twisting warm wind; and I fought it, and I cried: Why are you letting me go, please, don't let me go. And then I heard it, the words. They were simple:

Just Read About Me.

Again, this is not intended as anything but the sharing of my own experience. Afterwards, I made a complete recovery. The doctor said that he had never seen anyone heal so quickly, and he had confided in me that he had great reservations in not hospitalizing me. When I told him that I had some type of very serious reaction to the medication, and that I may have even lost consciousness, ( I did not tell him that I thought I may have died, for I was still processing that myself) he agreed to immediately discontinue the drugs; and conceded, that I may have gone into anaphylactic shock.

I can't prove that what happened to me was an after life experience, I don't think anybody can. The only thing we can do, is be as honest about our experience as we possibly can, and that is what I've tried to do here. It is my sincerest hope, that in some small way, I may have helped.



An anonymous caregiver answered...

My mother died a week ago. She was 88 years old. She had numerous physical problems, but ultimately her body just wore out. She was unconscious the last 3 days of her life and gently stopped breathing with her grand daughters by her side (my brother, sister and I had left for a short time because she seemed the same as she had been and then she died before we got back).

I came across this web page because this is a question my Mom had asked my sister about a year ago, "Does it hurt to die?" I guess I just wanted to know what others would say. I do not think my mother hurt because she was unconscious and did not moan or grimice in anyway to indicate pain. It helped to read the answers on here. I am still hurting and grieving her passing but expect to feel that way for some time. Thanks to all who shared your experiences, good and bad.


An anonymous caregiver answered...

I can't say for sure if there is any joy or pain in dying. The only thing I can say is that you're not going to be bound to a world where suffering is constant.


AllisonTellsYou answered...

We'll dying dont hurt because you are actually sleeping peaceful looking at The face of The beautiful God????And also leaving memories behind that was untold or told 6 years ago and also make sure your born again when you get older or....????????


An anonymous caregiver answered...

You know, how many people on earth have literally just died, never to come back? Nobody. There have been near death experiences, and they have all come back with some idea that they took something from it, but the bottom line is this: if they had a near death experience, they would take nothing from it because one needs a brain to remember anything...

I had a near death experience in my life. I am epileptic and one day I had a seizure that lasted well over 5 minutes. According to some witnesses, even those who do not freak out around people having seizures, most people around me measured it to be close to 10 minutes. A brain w/o oxygen for that long loses a lot. Most of my memories from before that are completely gone or so scrambled that I can't give a solid answer as to what happened then.

Was it peaceful when I left? Yes, but that is true anytime I have a seizure. I know it's going to happen, normally I have SOME memory of what happened up to a few seconds when I black out, but I try to tell myself that I have some euphoric experience when I have a seizure the bottom line is this. My brain isn't working, so any "memory" or "experience" I have is something either invented by my brain to cover the time I was blacked out or something I personally create to try to make sense of it.

Either way, my point is this - nobody alive can give an accurate idea of what it is like to die. If anyone gives you an experience they went through then they didn't die. They either made something voluntarily or made something involuntarily to help cope with what they went through. I have those "memories" and others can tell you the same, but if they are still alive, there is no way that what they tell you is what happened when they "died". It takes a memory to recall something that happened.

It's not a bad thing. It's how we cope with things. The truth is that no one really knows what will happen when we die. It's all a coping mechanism. Death is inevitable. It's not scary, but we need reason in our lives and so we cope. It's okay :)


An anonymous caregiver answered...

Many years ago, I was taking care of the former pastor of my church. he had never married, and my husband and I literally made him part of our family. He had a very serious heart condition, and towards the end of his life with many hospitalizations, he was in the final nursing physically. HIs Kidneys had started to fail and just before he was on dyalisis, he had me arrange a funeral service, pay all his outstanding bills, and sell his car, put his house on he market, and make sure he could be cremated and be placed with his deceased parents. As he was dictating orders to me, my husband asked him how will it feel to be in heaven, with a quick retort "How would I know, I 've never been there." He still had his since of humor, Twp days later he died from congenital heart failure, but he made sure all was well before he left this earth.