Heart & Stroke Support Group

Hello Macy63,

I'm sorry to hear that you're not feeling well. Caring.com has several articles that may health you understand and manage CHF and Atrial Fibrillation:

• Managing Congestive Heart Failure

• Easing Congestive Heart Failure

• Atrial Fibrillation- Discuss Symptom, Stages, Treatment

You may also want to contact your local Area Agency on The Aging for service resources that are affordable in your area.

Caring.com is an informational website only, and does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. We encourage you to speak with a licensed medical professional offline to receive expert guidance in treating the health symptoms you described.

I hope you find these resources help and don't hesitate to reach out if I can be of further assistance.

Hello Jlearner,

I am so glad that your mother is recover well from her stroke. I would encourage you to contact a medical professional if she is experience pain. Caring.com is an informational website, therefore if there is any resources I can assist you with please let me know. Thanks

Your husband is very frustrated & super angry~ I"m sure he has post traumantic stress disorder~ That's what I had after my stroke, I was mad, and SO Frustrated at all of my apts, ot, pt. speech therapy, I'm sure he will bounce back~ I did it, It's all in your attitude, support from your true friends, please get him a pyschologist~ I needed one to see every week, It's so worth it. As for needing extra money Start a fundraiser for your husband~ Big hug to you~ I'm hear for you!!!

thank you! I've been so busy haven't had a chance to get online. My husband is coming home in a few days and I am glad you mentioned the psychologist; thank you! I will have a hard time convincing him to talk to somebody for he's the type that doesn't need that kind of help ever! I will choose my approach carefully. I've have had a new raised toilet installed and ordered 4 grab bars for shower and toilet area, to be installed Wed. He did not want a toilet too tall or with side handles for it would appear too "handicapped". Thanks so much for the feedback; it helps a lot. I go to occupational therapy with him tomorrow and will meet with his case worker and Dr again to find out exact discharge date. God bless you for being here and "giving back". Who cared for you during recovery, may I ask.

Thank you!

Eileenbc,

Welcome to this online support group. We are glad you found us. I am sorry to hear of your daughter's stroke. I hear the frustration you are facing. This is a good place to vent, cry, laugh, get/give advice and encouragement. Caring.com has a Stroke Resource Center with articles, frequently asked questions and a link to other stroke websites.

Please come back to Caring.com as often as you need . Thanks for sharing, and I hope these suggestions will be supportive for you.

Just tell them what you feel and how you are trying to get back to as much of normal as possible. That said, your parents may see dangers that you do not see or feel.

My husband had a stroke 16 years ago at age 64 with absolutely no warning whatsoever and has had many episodes since without any warning. Sudden. We now see behaviors that can be warning signs. He has no anxiety or fear about things which makes it very difficult for me and my son. It is a fine line.

We want him to do as much as he wants but also have fear about his condition, especially driving.

It might be best to talk with your parents and exchange all of your feelings. It is horribly frustrating for you but they feel a responsibility for your safety and it is credible.

My husband has gotten angry at times with us about doing some things but after we talk it out and discuss it honestly and openly we all come to understanding each other and more importantly what is safe and appropriate for him. We value his independence and confidence but not at the expense of his life or a preventable disaster.

So important to talk things out. You both have ideas and thoughts that can be helpful. It took me a long time to accept a lot of the things he was wanting to do and could do without a ton of anxiety. I had more worry than he did. People have strokes and never have another one and are fine for years and some have small ones and are still ok so it is important to enjoy life and do what you love but you do have to be prudent.

Also, if you have a physical therapist, they could talk with all of you.

A psychologist that specializes in stroke recovery would also be a good idea. Should have done this myself. There are no stroke support groups around here for families. It would have helped us a ton.

Thank you for responding I appreciate that other people have faced similiar challenges. However my parent and my relationship is very rocky, I tried to talk to them about what I felt or at lest try to explain. They have difficulty listening to me and take what I suggest serious with getting very upset. We have since gone our seperate ways on some what bad terms. Has anybody had a similiar situation and how did things turn out?

I have no answer for you in this department. I am so very sorry for the changes that are going on! I can however offer you a HUG!

Maybe what is good for the goose is good for the gander! You go get a job - maybe that will help him and give him more time with you. Plan something to capture his attention, Make a life of your own (with/without) him - You are a person! Maybe God is preparing you and him for the ultimate direction. I'm not say someone is dieing! or divorce! but to be all that you can be!!! together and apart! Having heart surgery is a wake-up call! He went thru it (I did too) and I know I went thru a lot - mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually! But everyone is different. Do Not discount 45 years!!! He loves you, but keeping the life to live, communication, sharing like a teenager, Helping one another, ..... is what he is looking for, Maybe he wants to live more. Do you see what I am trying to say? He is not dead yet nor does he want to live like it and he shouldn't. Find something you both can enjoy together that he has never did! Camping, fishing, travel, yoga, One thing - you can't change another person unless they want to change! Hopefully - this helps. I do know that heart surgery is a Eye-opener! God Bless the doctors, Your husband and you.

My hubby, 53, had a stroke 3 years ago. Very severe, aphasic, brain bleed etc... He was on the upswing for 1 1/2 years and started having seizures. Sometimes for some people dementia is "stimulated" by the stroke, my husbands seems to get stronger after each seizure.. Maybe there was an underlying cause to his stroke, maybe he has been having mini strokes...it is so hard to tell! Even if I could tell there are not a lot of alternatives and I am not into medicating him more than he is! I have also been reading up on stroke fatigue. This issue does not get addressed readily because we are busy addressing the basics, PT,OT and getting back some quality of life. It does happen, even to people who have been stroke free for 10 plus years! I am so sorry for your brother in law and your family. My new mantra lately is " Everyday is a new landscape" I borrowed that from a friend. It is helping me with the frustration and the not knowing what each hour, or day, will bring with the hubby's mental decline. HUGS

care.com has listings. start there! then contact SS, Public aide, etc... there are plenty of agencies and home care to help her - Now that you don't want to help your sister.

PattiAnn47,

I am sorry for the delay in response. Your local your local Area Agency on the Aging is designed to assist seniors who are on lower income with housing options and other resources.

Additional resources for your sister is also available:

• Stroke Resource Center

• Best Websites for Strokes

I hope you find these resources helpful. Thanks.

Hello pguenther,

Thank you for posting your question and reaching out to the group for advice. I may have a few resources for you to explore:

The American Stoke Association[strokeassociation.org] has a support group finder that may be appropriate for your husband.

Also a companion may be helpful as well. Elder Companions can participate in hobbies or social activities while you are at work and your son is at school. To locate an elder companion in your area, search the Caring.com Service Directory.

Hope these resources are helpful!

I would also like to suggest therapy for your son and husband. Both/all have gone/going thru physical and mental changes. Maybe if they go camping and create a bond - a therapist would help more and/or Church!! I don't think the anger (disrespect, argueing, etc...) will help his health in anyway, or anyone. And it sounds like the son needs help understanding also, maybe more responsibility for him will teach more respect; how to handle pressures. I raised 3 alone - and that is the age for peer-presser and he (your son) went thru the trama too, Maybe the Lord has provided this time for them to connect - I don't know==== Keep searching - they are both worth it and your family too(you)!!! Good Luck and God Bless