Advice Please on Dealing with Elderly Father
Hi, This is first site I've been to looking for help and it appears to be a great one. My dad is 77 and lives with my stepmother of same age. Both are very sedentary but do get around on errands, out to eat, etc or rather did. Stepmom uses walker and is very frail.
Dad went in hospital a month ago and long story short ended up with blocked intestine and pancreatitis. 10 days later released to nursing home for rehab. Day of his release all of a sudden he couldn't urinate so has had a catheter in for 3 weeks now. Does PT and OT and can walk although a bit of a shuffle (Was that way before). While in hospital he developed dementia on top of it all. I feel at least some of the dementia is from the UTI that he had and still has - on antibiotics whole time. Last week he went to urologist and still can't pee so catheter back in. Doc thinks perhaps prostate issue but can't run the proper tests while he is in the nursing home as medicare won't pay.
Next week we are having a family meeting with the social worker. My stepmom does not want him home. I think it is mostly fear of something happening while he is home as she cares deeply for him and visits every day. She just isn't strong enough herself to care for him. My sis and I think it is imperative that we get him back to his house so we can do the prostate tests and see if this dementia is a short term thing from the UTI and hospital stay or if we are going to have to see about something else for the long run.
My sister and I are probably going to have to share at first spending nights there so that hopefully she will be more comfortable allowing him home. Our only reason we don't want to is that my stepmom smokes in the house and we both can't absolutely stand smoke. It smells terrible in there. I'd imagine medicare will qualify him for some sort of nurse to stop by, change catheter, etc. As this is brand new for us can anyone give me advice on how to 1) get stepmom comfortable as she is adamant he is not coming home and 2) what in your experience does medicare cover ? Is there a site which shows limits of coverage ? Many thanks and sorry for the novel !!!