my aunt (86) seemed to be getting forgetful for a couple of years, but was still living on her own. 3 months ago she developed pneumonia, and a couple of other infections and was hospitalized for a couple of weeks then was sent to rehab for 3 weeks. At the end of all this she seemed to be getting better and against the advise of the therapists at the rehab I asked that she be allowed to go home with carers (I am her poa), she was only home a few days when she fired all the carers, refused her medications and called EMS to get her a drink of water. I don't live with her, and because I am in Canada, just across the border from her, I could not have her live with me. After the ems incident I called them again and had her taken to the hospital because I suspected an infection, she was delirious, paranoid and was hallucinating. At the hospital they did all the test to rule out infections, and then did CT scans, neurology reports and a physic evaluation. The upshot was, she has demential with paranoia, delusions and hallucinations. While in the hospital she became extremely angry with me and told me to get out, I was called the next day and told she had agreed to go to a full care facility long term. We went and met with her and the doctors, she seemed ok and even spoke to me. Next day she screamed at me to get out again, now (20 days later) she will neither see me nor speak to me, get really agitated when my name is mentioned and screams if she sees me. I have stayed away and phone every day and ask the nurses to tell her I love her and want to see her, but she says I put her into care, and I am stealing all her money and she never wants to see me again, tells everyone I have listening devises in her room and am spying on her through the window. This is tearing me apart, I feel terrible guilt because I did promise never to put her into care, and I also start to think the diagnoses is wrong, especially when other people visit her and say she appears to be fine. She has refused all her medications, (COPD, congestive heart failure and fluid in the lungs) and all oxygen, but still appears ok. She has stopped therapy so now Medicare will not help with the bills, this is over $7000 per month, she has enough money to last a little while, when that runs out she will have to go into a semi private room. This is all wearing me down, my husband is getting upset with me because I can't sleep properly, feel guilty all the time, and talk about her constantly, even though I try not to.