Mom's stroke at 86
My mom had a bad bleed in her cerebellum 10 days ago. They thought she wouldn't make it. Amazingly, she is learning to walk again. She can talk and swallow. She is sleeping endlessly but is cooperating with her rehab. The problem is with her reality and memory. She still has fairly good short term but has forgotten that my dad passed on 19 years ago. She's upset he doesn't call or visit. She thinks he's alive. I tried gently to tell her the truth but after a couple of minutes she started in about him being alive again. I hate to see her sad thinking he is abandoning her. I don't know how to handle this. Anybody have an experience like this. This is really the only part of her memories that she has forgotten. She has had some crazy thoughts also. Her dog being arrested and people stealing my dad's car( which doesn't exsist )Mostly she sounds perfectly fine except for a couple of subjects, her husband etc. I's so confused. Is this dementia???
My mother died a few months ago she had a bad stroke 4 years ago she knew much what was going on. After a couple years my dad died he would call her at the nursing home. She wanted to call him an talk to him. I knew i had to just tell her that he had died . I took her out on the porch an i just told her that dad died 2 weeks ago mom. I was afraid to tell her i waited a couple weeks . She cryed alot but i think it was the right thing to do. She told me she would never be alright after i told her. I cryed with her . She did not mention it tho after. So im glad i told her it was the hardest thing i have ever done. It really hurt that day. God bless you an im sorry she probably has dementia i think those stroke can mess with the mind. I hope you the best. God Bless always.
Sometimes it's just better to play along with their realitly. You can tell her that Dad just went home to get some rest and he'll be back later. She'll accept that, and that 19-year-old heartbreak won't have to be relived by either of you. I did that when my husband was dying of cancer, and it helped. Bless you. Janet
