CommunityDiscussions About Senior Money Legal

1. What's Fair When Mom Moves In?

   Community Discussion - Two years ago, my 62-year-old mom lost her job and was injured shortly thereafter. Recognizing that my mom would need help for more than a few months, and since she didn't have any money, my wife and I had a small apartment built onto our detached garage in our back yard where she has been living and recovering for the past 2 years...

2. How Do I Reconcile This Debt?

   Community Discussion - I read Steve'Weisman's answer to this question, but it was vague. I have stacks of my late mother's bills. They are mainly medical bills. She had no will. I can't figure out what she owed to whom. Some have been turned over to collection agencies so they have different account numbers. I don't have the money for court costs to open a probate...

3. Who Pays For Your Loved One's Care?

   Community Discussion - If you're caring for a loved one, who pays for their care? Is the majority paid for by insurance, savings, contributions from you or other relatives or government sponsored assistance programs?

4. Getting Paid For Full Time Care Of My Mother

   Community Discussion - Is there a way to get paid for caring for my mom?

5. Health Care Reform - how will the changes affect you?

   Community Discussion - What do you all think of the health care reform bill? How do you think it will affect you in your everyday life? If my Facebook wall is any indication, this is a pretty "hot" topic right now. I found what I believe to be a pretty non-biased article in the NY Times[nytimes.com] yesterday that does a good job of explaining exactly what changes will occur...

6. Where does one find and pay for a scooter?

   Community Discussion - Where do I go in central Illinois to get help paying for a motor scooter?

7. Parents want to pay rent to live with us!

   Community Discussion - My parents are 91 and 92 and must move out of their home of 50+ years. They can afford to move to a retirement facility but they would much rather move in with us. We have a 1-bedroom apt. in our home that is fully self-contained. They want to pay us and since I am one of 4 siblings and the others are...

8. Survey Opportunity For Caregivers To Veterans Please Read

   Community Discussion - It is our pleasure at Caring.com to let our members know about a survey opportunity for caregivers to Veterans conducted by the National Alliance for Caregiving.

9. Payback Rules for Medicaid regarding gifts?

   Community Discussion - If my sister pays back a gift, and Mom dies before it's paid back, does my sister still have to pay back the balance?

10. Desperate For A Clear Cut Legal Answer Have Paid Lawyers But Gotten No Answers.

    Community Discussion - Have taken mom to see 2 different attorneys who each charged a fortune, gave no clear answers and offered to help her 'spend down' her money in what was said in a 'joking' tone but I don't think they were joking....

11. Can Alzheimer's patients get Supplemental Security Income?

    Community Discussion - My mom needs some more funds to get into an assisted living site.

12. Is there a way for me to get paid for taking care of my mom?

    Community Discussion - I had to turn down a job to take care of her and I'm unemployed. Can I get paid somehow?

13. Tips For Applying For Medicaid And Other Assistance Programs

    Community Discussion - Have you walked your parent through the process of applying for Medicaid or other assistance programs? Do you have helpful advice to share or questions for those who have been there and done that, so to speak?

14. What's the best way to find out a nursing home's cost, discreetly?

    Community Discussion - Title sums it up.

15. A Caregiving Money Poll

    Community Discussion - Anyone want to play? Just copy the questions below, erase my answers and then put in your own. Also feel free to add your own questions to the survey !

16. My Mom Won't Get Help With Caring For My Grandmother, But Takes Her Frustration Out On Me!

    Community Discussion - My Grandmother is 90 years old and has Alzheimer's dementia. I don't know what stage, I just know she's been like this, progressively getting worse, for about six years. Six years ago she was still living alone but forgetting things and needing someone to stop by often...

17. Newly Diagnosed - When Does Patient Advocate and Durable Power of Attorney Begin?

    Community Discussion - Caregiver to my grandmother who now lives with us, I am Patient Advocate and have DPOA. She was diagnosed April 2009 with Alzheimer's and I have been active in her care for years now. Fighting her and family about "what's wrong with grandma"! Since the introduction of Aricept, Gram displays less forgetfulness and even she states the "fog has been lifted"...

18. I Need A 15-20 Year Financial Plan For My Destitute Mother

    Community Discussion - My 67-year-old mother is destitute. My husband and I bought her an apartment and subsidize not only her rent, but also her food and household needs. She doesn't really do the math on that. My sister helps a little, but she is currently jobless and generally unwilling to discuss our mother's situation or future...

19. Today I Am Scared.

    Community Discussion - Caring for my wife's mother is leaving us feeling as if we are paddling in circles and our money is running out.

20. Is A Warehouse Membership (Costco, Sam's, Etc) Worth It For Personal Care Items?

    Community Discussion - What's the consensus on this? Is the price of a warehouse membership worth the discount you get on personal care items like Depends, OTC drugs/vitamins/supplements, prescription drugs, and other things? In our area, both Sam's and Costco are about $50 per year.

21. The National Alliance for Caregiving is seeking family caregivers of veterans for a new study

    Community Discussion - Caring.com is pleased to work with the The National Alliance for Caregiving in helping them find family caregivers of veterans for a new study. If you fall into this category, we encourage you to read on and consider participating.

22. We're taking care of her, but she doesn't want to help us out financially!

    Community Discussion - My 89 year old mother in law, struggles with loss of hearing ( she needs hearing aids but cowards away from the cost), vision issues Left eye had shingles is not capable of acute vision and has glaucoma. Her right eye has cataract and glaucoma as well. The visual disability affects balance, walking and driving...

23. Appropriate Caregiving For Brain Cancer Parent

    Community Discussion - My father was diagnosed with brain cancer about 10 months ago. It was insinuated by the doctors his life expectancy was going to be 6 months. He's lived with me and my family the entire time.

24. Could Mom's Partner Be There Just For The Money?

    Community Discussion - Hiring an in-home health care worker is upsetting Mom's 30-year partner, and we're not sure what this means!

25. Help Post-Surgery at home

    Community Discussion - I am 71,widow, having surgery the 3rd of august, I live alone. Would I be able to get help post surgery? my doctor said no house cleaning for 3 months! thanks Louise butler

26. Need assistance with finances - my husband has cancer!

    Community Discussion - My husband has cancer and he needs more help! is it possible for him to get more social security disability if i were to quit my job and stay home to care for him? It is too hard to do both but I need the money.

27. Spending Down - what can I spend it on?

    Community Discussion - She doesn't need anything, but I need to get Mom's account down.

28. Need Nursing Home Advice!

    Community Discussion - Can nursing homes turn away ill patients, and what to do if Medicare won't approve the nursing home?

29. Asking Siblings For Financial Contribution Towards Mom's Care

    Community Discussion - I have just done something that has filled me with guilt: I asked my brother to contribute towards my mom's care.

30. Important Advice For All Caregivers....A Must Read.

    Community Discussion - I am writing to warn everyone about the mistakes we've made.

31. Mom Had A Stroke Many Questions Help!

    Community Discussion - Glad to find this group. I am hoping some of you folks can give me some insights. I have so many questions. I dropped everything and flew across the country and have been here since. I have many questions but am now trying to decide what I should do to help care for Mom...

32. What's Your Best Advice For Saving Money On Prescription Drugs?

    Community Discussion - Many people pay out hundreds of dollars, or more, a month in prescription drug costs. Do you have any tips for saving money on them?

33. When Mom Or Dad Didn't Prepare, Financially, For Their Care, What Do You Do?

    Community Discussion - If your parent was unable to prepare financially for their care, what have you done? Chipped in? Applied for aid? Something else?

34. Mom And Ovarian Cancer Treatment - Is it Working and How Can We Pay For It?

    Community Discussion - My mother was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer Stage 4 back in 2009. She survived the surgery and is on her 2nd round of chemo. One of the problems is that she feels that she is dying and the chemo is not working for now. It is still spreading. We are a low income family...

35. Help Us Choose Products for Caring.Com's Deal Of The Week!

    Community Discussion - Who doesn't love a good deal, right? Good news, Caring.com is hard at work bringing them to our members!

36. How Has Caregiving Affected Your Monthly Budget?

    Community Discussion - How has caregiving affected your monthly budget? What things (if any) have you had to cut back on?

37. Have You Discovered Any Bargains Or Tips For Saving Money On Medical And Personal Care Supplies?

    Community Discussion - It never fails to amaze me how expensive things like adult diapers are. I've even known of older adults to attempt to reuse them to save money. So I'm wondering, do you know of any bargains or have money saving tips for medical or personal care supplies? Do you buy in bulk? Do you keep an eye out for coupons...

38. What To Do For Money When You Are On Social Security

    Community Discussion - I am on S.S. but it is not enough.A stroke almost killed me 5 years ago.Do not know what to do now!

39. Usable Medical Equipment - what can we do with it now?

    Community Discussion - Any suggestions on how to sell and/or dispose of used medical equipment including a scooter, wheelchairs, motorized chair, and a handicap van?

40. Where Should The Money Go?

    Community Discussion - My Brother and I am trying to sell my Mothers land and house. My Dad died last April '09 and I moved her to my house in a diffeent state. My Brother lives 10 miles from my Mothers land.He's not involved with her care.

41. Question Regarding Life Insurance

    Community Discussion - I have been living with my father for the past year and a half in order to care for him and his house. He currently has a life insurance policy that he is paying way too much for and I'm considering purchasing an additional term life policy on him...

42. He'll only play Bingo if there's money at stake - not just for fun!

    Community Discussion - He says if he can't win any money then why bother, and so he just lays around!

43. Should I Offer To Take Mom In?

    Community Discussion - Ok...I really have been debating this one. My mom lives in NY and has her whole life. I, however moved to Seattle about 6 years back. Since then her health has deteriorated enough that she had to move from her apt to one in a independent senior community where she has been for over a year now...

44. Am I Being Mean By Not Buying Mom Cigarettes?

    Community Discussion - Hello, and I would really like some advice because I don't know what to do anymore. My husband and I moved my 61 year old mother to Hawaii to live with us and our daughter (we are military)in March. She had retired and used part of her saving to buy a house in 94, I don't know what happened but I found...

45. Wealthy Stepfather Won't Spend A Dime Toward Our Mother's Stroke Recovery

    Community Discussion - Without our stepfather spending the extra money for private therapies, she will remain an invalid and will never be able to communicate again!

46. Elder Abuse Laws preventing caregivers from making decisions?

    Community Discussion - I think it is time our elected officials hear from us, the caregivers. For them to hear our stories. Learn what help we give, but how much help we need.

47. Is a gift of money considered in the Medicaid look-back period?

    Community Discussion - Would my brother have to pay back the money she gave him to make her eligible for Medicaid, or someone else?

48. Can Dad's Social Security be used to pay me to care for him?

    Community Discussion - I was told twice by two different people at Social Security that the money has to be used for HIM only. They said I can hire SOMEONE ELSE to come in a clean and mop and pay that person from his SS check, but I can't pay myself.

49. Advice Please On Free Legal Advice

    Community Discussion - my parents are aging and disabled and are in a position to almost be foreclosed on is there any free legal advice they can get to try and save their home? They are both on social security benefits with very little income

50. Can I Get Paid To Be My Mother's Full Time Caregiver?

    Community Discussion - My mother is crippled, going blind, and needs a lot of my time. She recently asked my after I got laid off, if I could become employed as her full-time caregiver. I already run all of her errands, lift and carry her from place to place, and clean her house, can I pay my bills on what they would give me to take care of her full-time...

51. Have You Ever Considered Buying Long Term Care Insurance?

    Community Discussion - So many of us have experienced the weight of long-term care costs. It can be overwhelming! So have you ever considered buying long-term care insurance for yourself? If you have, what prompted you to do so? And if you chose not too, why?

52. What Do You Do When An Alzheimer's Patient Starts Hitting During Moments Of Rage?

    Community Discussion - My mother is the primary caregiver to my step-father that is in late stages Alzheimers. We believe he is in stage 6. He is beginning to have difficulty with balance, walking and forming complete sentences or thoughts. We already have to remind who we are sometimes and he only talks about things that happened 30+ years ago...

53. What Products Do You Find Yourself Buying More Of Now That You Are A Caregiver?

    Community Discussion - What products do you find yourself buying more of now that you are a caregiver? Have you found any tips to help to offset this new expense?

54. Is Mexico a better financial choice for assisted living?

    Community Discussion - I have seen many seemingly beautiful assisted living homes advertised in Encinada and Rosarito, Mexico that are 1/3 the price of an average home in Los Angeles. Has anyone heard whether or not people have had successful experiences in them? Any advice? My mother is 88 and in the advanced stages of Alzheimer's...

55. Will Medicaid pay for mental health care?

    Community Discussion - My mom is a cancer survivor (brain cancer) and young hip replacement recipient (she is 63). Her depression is a chicken-or-the-egg question for the ages, but her mental health is definitely on the decline since she had her hip replacement. A whole host of other issues have occured, including selling...

56. Are there programs available to help with the cost of a wheelchair accessible van?

    Community Discussion - Does anyone one know of purchase assistance or programs that provide assistance to acquire such a van?

57. Can my caregiver become family and receive benefits?

    Community Discussion - Hi I was a care attendant for 20 years. First for my parents until they passed and my ex for 8 out of 16 years (new wife deals with him now). For the last 5 years due t trying to stop a mini van with my hip in a cross walk, i have needed my own attendant (and ppl think docs make bad patients lol).

58. Mom's Supplemental Security Income Is Denied!

    Community Discussion - She was already suffering from not having enough to pay for her caregiver and her dental...and now they cut her only income too!

59. Is it Insurance Fraud to actually use the Unemployment Coverage Insurance Grandma has been paying for?

    Community Discussion - "My Grandmother has credit card debt on three credit cards. One of the cards has been charging her Unemployment and Disability Coverage Insurance since she took over the accounts after my Grandfather passed away. Currently I have no way of knowing if the Coverage was added in recent years or if my Grandfather...

60. Who's Responsible For Mom's Debt After She Passes?

    Community Discussion - My mom doesn't have much time left, and she's penniless.

61. Tax Matters - Can I Claim My Mother on my taxes?

    Community Discussion - I spend a lot on her care - is she my dependent, then?

62. Anyone Know If Cash Support Provided To Your Parent Is Counted Towards Medicare LIS?

    Community Discussion - Is there an easy way to find clear Medicare and Medicaid info and assistance?

63. Work at Home Job Opportunities, Are They Out There?

    Community Discussion - I need to earn money while caring for my husband - are there any suggestions?

64. Am I Doing The Right Thing By Putting Her In A Home?

    Community Discussion - Am I doing the right thing by not telling anyone in the family where she is, and asking the home to not allow anyone that I do not agree with to see her?

65. If You Parent Lives With You, Do You Use Any Of Their Money To Pay For Living Expenses?

    Community Discussion - If your parent lives with you, do you use any of their income or assets to offset the household expenses? Do you split the mortgage or rent, for example? Is it okay to use some of their income for groceries?

66. Is there help for cremation costs?

    Community Discussion - My father passed away and I cannot afford a funeral. His lifetime partner(a woman), has lived with him for fourteen years. Both were receiving S.S.I. and/or Disability benefits. They are financially in debt and she is afraid that she, even though given P.O.A., is not eligible to receive any HELP for the funeral/cremation costs/ or Catholic Services...

67. Anyone else feel "stuck" being a caregiver?

    Community Discussion - Just need to do a little venting and if anyone has any good advice, please throw it out there. I have moved in with my fiance; his grandmother lives with him and has dementia (he bought her home to help her with her finances with the promise that she could continue to live here until she passes)...

68. What are the risks of a reverse mortgage?

    Community Discussion - My parents have a reverse mortgage on their home. My elderly father has incurred an insurrmantable amount of credit card dept he will not be able to continue to make payments on. I am concerned that if he declares bankrupt he may lose his home...

69. What's Your Secret To Getting The Best Prices On Medications?

    Community Discussion - What is your secret to getting the best prices on medications? Do you participate in any of the drugstore's prescription discount cards/programs?

70. Summertime Deals! Be Sure You Come To Check Them Out....

    Community Discussion - Hey, good June, lovely people! Summer is here (well for parts of the country, but for the rest of us, it's definitely on its way!)

71. Caught In A Tough Situation With My Father

    Community Discussion - My mom suffers from Parkinsons diagnosed in 1994. Her and my dad have been married for 48 years and he is her primary caregiver and POA. 2009 was a very rough year. She was hospitalized twice both times due to dehydration and "hypo" tension blacking out episodes of passing out. She spent 27 days in a hospital and then came staight home...

72. What can my Alzheimer's mom do to earn some money?

    Community Discussion - She wants to feel like she's contributing - any ideas that aren't scams?

73. Do you try to fit things in at the end of the year because your health insurance deductible has been met and will start over again soon?

    Community Discussion - It wasn't until my parents starting having health issues that I began paying attention to when their health insurance deductible was met and when it started over. In most cases, it starts over on January 1 of the new year. So this is just a public service announcement.....

74. Does my new wife become responsible for the reverse mortgage if I die?

    Community Discussion - I have a reverse mortgage on my home. My deceased wife and i are on the title. I recently got remarried. If I pass away what is the new wife status.? evad

75. Husband With Cancer Losing Job Need Advice On How To Prepare For Finances

    Community Discussion - Everyone we talk to is amazed that my husband is still working after all he's been through. He has over 100 tumors in his right leg and has been through many unsuccessful treatments since he was diagnosed. We currently travel out of state for treatment...

76. When A Caregiver Leaves

    Community Discussion - I live in Pa, does anyone know if there are legal consequences for a caregiver that abandons a patient, My step-mother just left my Dad and although she is not his POA, she also did not tell anyone she was leaving him so that other arangements could be made for his care

77. Who To Go To For Financial Advice?

    Community Discussion - As my mom slips deeper into dementia, I'm trying to organize her limited savings and make it accesible to us. Right now she has several checking/savings accounts out there, a couple of which I have access too, but several that are only in her name.

78. Advice Please On Dealing With Elderly Father

    Community Discussion - My sister and I don't really want to have to stay with him - will Medicare cover a visiting nurse?

79. Only Child That Helps Mom

    Community Discussion - I have a brother and his wife that could help me BUT he dont. He help his wife with her mother, Why cant they help with his Mom. I keep telling him he needs to help, needs to see her more often and to even call. He does not do anything. Why is it that the male child allways think they dont need to. I ask them to come stay with her...

80. Am I their Contractor or their Employee?

    Community Discussion - Who's responsible for the taxes?

81. How do we sort out assets for Medicaid eligibility?

    Community Discussion - We are applying for Medicaid. Here are specific questions I need advice on...

82. Is it legal to pay for in-home care by check written out to "cash"?

    Community Discussion - I am trying to help an elderly friend of mine find out if the way she has been paying for her live in home care is legal.

83. I'm frustrated with dealing with an financially and emotional dependent mother!!!

    Community Discussion - Hello, I'm 35 years old woman and since i'm 17 my mother depends economically and emotionally on me. I was so desperate that when I was 27 I left my country and came to Europe to scape from the situation.However, even I'm far from her,I still call her every single day and I still respond for her economically...

84. Alzheimer's And Spending Money For "contests"

    Community Discussion - My father has never been a smart money manager, but his recent diagnosis of Alzheimer's may have made the situation worse.

85. Is There A Trick To Getting Discounts From Doctors And Hospitals?

    Community Discussion - My brother always tells me (and my mom) "negotiate with your doctors/hospitals". I've never tried it, though. Have you done it and ended up with a reduced bill? Or some sort of good payment plan? Tell me how you went about it and what the result was.

86. Getting The Whole Family Involved In Saving Money

    Community Discussion - I recently just read a blog post here on Caring.com about getting the whole family involved in saving money . One of the best tips it mentioned is a system called the multi-generational coupon mission. The concept is simple- since the caregiver generally has less time on their hands than the person they...

87. How Do You Afford Long Term Care Costs?

    Community Discussion - Nursing homes and assisted living facillities are so expensive and, often, not an option for many families who have to pay out of pocket. So if your loved one is in a long-term care facility, how are you paying? Medicaid? Long-term care insurance? Family members contributing financially?

88. Caregiving For Room & Board?

    Community Discussion - Has anyone gotten someone to care for their elderly parent(bathing, meals, light cleaning, companionship) in exchange for room and board? I'm considering this option for my dad, so that he can stay in his home--unfortunately I work full time and can't give him the time/care he needs...