An anonymous caregiver asked...
My parents are 92 and 89. Although my father has some medical issues that he must see a doctor for about two times per month, they are both in relatively good physical and mental condition, and both still drive their cars. They currently live in the house they have lived in for the past 35 years. It is one floor, so easily adaptable for elderly living. However, I live two hours away by car, and cannot just go down there at the drop of a hat (I have a family here to take of care of, too.) I have tried to encourage them to move to a Continuing Care community. They have looked at some near them, and they seem to find something wrong with all of them. I even had someone from their local Elder Affairs office come out to the house and we had a "group meeting" to discuss their options. She strongly encouraged them to try out some of the services, such as housekeeping, cooking, laundry person, etc. before they actually "needed" it. They have done none of this. It seems like they can't make up their minds what to do, so, in the meantime, they just roam the malls, go out for lunch, etc. I feel they are being really stubborn and irresponsible. The problem will hit hard when something happens to one or the other, and the remaining one is left with the mess to clean up. They own two cars, only one of which they drive, two houses, only one of which they "use." I have begged them to think "simplify, simplify, simplify," but they won't listen. I feel as if I am dealing with two stubborn teenagers! What should I do?
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