How can we protect our elderly mother from being taken advantage of?
There is, of course, a chance that true love has bloomed between your mother and this fellow, in which case you may want to rethink your concerns. But it sounds as if you and others are pretty well convinced that it's money rather than love that's the prime motivation. And it sounds as if talking honestly with your mother has not changed her mood or mind.
If you have not done so yet, consider gathering the children and asking the man to meet with you, expressing your concerns directly to him. This might risk agitating your mother for a while, but in a surprising number of cases, the "courtship" ends once a potential defrauder finds out that a potential victim actually has a number of caring family members on the lookout.
If that doesn't work, and you still see signs of financial scamming, act quickly to prevent more from occurring. Because financial elder abuse is sadly on the rise, there are a growing number of organizations to which you can turn for local help.
- Your state's Adult Protective Services agency may provide tips and intervention. Find it by searching with your state name and "adult protective services."
- The National Center on Elder Abuse operates a confidential toll free hotline at 800-677-1116. It also maintains a comprehensive list of resources for each state at www.ncea.aoa.gov/NCEAroot/Main_Site/Find_Help/State_Resources.aspx.
- The Eldercare Locator, at 800-677-1116, also directs callers to senior information and referral telephone lines in their communities.
- And INFOLINK, at 800-394-2255, directs callers to the closest, most appropriate services for crime victims.
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