What can I do to motivate my mother to get up and exercise?

Oh, I am so sorry. This sounds like a difficult situation and is understandably discouraging and frustrating for you. Since your mom was in the NH for 3 months, it See also:
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See all 77 questions about Physical Activities would be interesting to talk with the rehab team there to get some insight into how they were able to motivate your mom. It sounds like there are a lot of layers to this problem--including her obesity, pain, and mental/emotional state. Has her MD evaluated her for depression? You are right to want to motivate your mom to get moving. Sitting in bed or a chair all day does not bode well for her recovery, mood, or functional outcomes. But remember that there is only so much you can do and ultimately her decisions are up to her. This being said, a couple of suggestions are: 1-get her some home or outpatient PT to address her function that is limited by her pain, 2-use what is important to her to motivate her and don't even reference "exercise" i.e. suggest she make coffee for her husband or go for a little walk with you to see the garden, or go out in a wheel chair to shop for her grand kids 3-finally, sometimes suggestions from family members aren't received well. Perhaps you can speak to some of her friends about helping to encourage your mom. The best of luck to you. Remember--that you are just one piece in a very big and complicated puzzle.

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The thing is, you can't motivate another person. Only another person can motivate themselves.

How is your mother normally motivated. Then start creating her environment to have that in it.

For example, @Laura mentioned having your mom make coffee for her husband. The thing to find out is what your mother likes doing. If she likes serving, then maybe reminding her that getting up to make coffee for her husband is a wonderful action to take.

It's not going to be easy but you'll find the right way. For now you might want to let go of your expectation that she is going to be doing squats everyday! Or whatever expectation you might have.

My mom, while a skinny little toothpick thing at 95 pounds at 84 years old, refuses to exercise too. When she is in my caregiving, 4 months of the year, I noticed she is willing to exercise if I do it along side of her - fear of falling maybe? So I save about 10 minutes of my own work out routine to do a few exercises along side her.

It's a GREAT question!

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