My father has been diagnosed with prostate cancer. He already has chronic heart disease. He's 80 years old, still works, and bowls with me, my brother, and my brother's girlfriend every Sunday after mass. He's unbelievable. But, I worry. I want him to live every minute of his life to the fullest, but I also never want to lose sight of the illnesses that he has that are pretty serious. How can I maintain a healthy balance of awareness and attention to my father's health without negatively impacting his generally good attitude about living every minute to the fullest? I don't want to be a downer, nor dishonest, but I want to be a realist without being a "nag." I also don't want my Dad to fall into a pattern of denial, or neglect, because he presently feels good enough to do things, but still has illnesses that need attention and care. (Sometimes, he'll go off his diet, or even forget to take his medicine.) It's a real challenge to try to be a caregiver without reminding a loved one that he or she is ill and then still manage to keep his or her spirits up. I know that mental health affects physical health, too, so I'm trying to balance reality with a touch of "hopefulness," so that I don't negatively impact someone who has a generally good attitude overall. Are there any coping mechanisms (i.e., exercises) that one can try to attain a good balance of appropriate caregiving without detracting from a loved one's more optimistic outlook? As I write this I think the question is more about my outlook than my Dad's. How can I know if it's my attitude or his that needs to be adjusted? Or, is an attitude adjustment even needed? I'm confused and sometimes stressed out about "being the best caregiver" that I can be, but don't know if I'm making the grade. Help!