Does my mother have a gambling addiction?


Last updated: 24-Oct-2008

Question from Caring.com Community Member, Marlen RF

I think my mother is becoming addicted to casinos. I'm not sure. Ever since casinos became legal where I live, she goes A LOT. I don't know whether she is addicted or not, or even if it's okay or not. Here is what I see: 1. She goes at nights; sometimes she goes four nights in a row. She doesn't go daily, but definitely goes at least twice a week. She always stays for more than two hours. Regularly she is out three to four hours. 2. She doesn't gamble that much, and sometimes loses and sometimes wins. She loses most of the time, though. I'll say something between $50 bucks per night. 3. She gets angry every time I mention to her that she goes too often. She just walks away immediately and says she is not hurting anyone. Although, considering that she doesn't work outside home and that my father is near retirement, I guess she is diminishing her own patrimony. 4. She goes a lot more frequently now after my father came clean about various infidelities. He's the provider of the family and was hospitalized after he confessed. I feel she's afraid of getting a divorce; she has no way of supporting herself. On the other hand, she's old fashioned and doesn't want to be divorced. My older sisters kind of expect my mom to just get over it, like nothing has happened, and if they hear a row between them, they tend to side with him! 5. My older sisters aren't too supportive. When they come home they almost expect my mother to take care of the grandkids, all afternoon, even if she’s tired of taking care of the household. 6. Also, my dad is a recovering alcoholic, so maybe she's getting back at him on some subconscious level, don't know. What’s sure is that they don’t get along. 7. She really doesn't seem to believe she's addicted, even though she really feels the need to go. 8. She rarely goes alone; she usually meets with different old friends there. All of whom were friends of her before the darn casinos arrived. Her friends go a lot too, but my mother goes more frequently than them. 9. Also, another of my sisters got married a few months ago and moved abroad. She misses her badly, since they had a pretty close relationship. 10. My mother was going to therapy, but as always: she dropped out of it. So, I don't know, is it dangerous for her that apparent addiction? Is there something I can do? Should I back off? Please, I really need some answers.

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