What Are My Options if I Can't Always Be at the Side of My Loved One With Dementia in the Hospital?

1 answer | Last updated: Dec 15, 2011
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Paula Spencer Scott, senior editor, writes extensively about health and caregiving. A 2011 Met Life Foundation Journalists in Aging fellow, she helped care for both...
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It's difficult for most caregivers to be continuously at the hospital bedside of someone with dementia, but since having someone close at hand can minimize confusion and improve communication, here See also:
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are some options:

  • Rotate the duty with other family members. Perhaps everyone could take a shift of a certain length of time. Keep a notebook you pass between one another to record important details, such as observations about pain and what the doctor has told you.

  • Stay most of the time yourself, but arrange for someone to spell you at specific intervals during the day so that you can eat and rest. (Eating and resting are vital!)

  • If your loved one has been paying a health aide or other helper in the home, consider paying this person to sit with your loved one in the hospital. It might seem like a splurge to pay a person to sit in a place where so many medical professionals are present. But don't undervalue the benefit to your loved one, who will be helped and reassured if someone familiar is around -- and therefore may be less likely to have negative consequences of hospitalization. This person can also take notes for you about what is observed or said in your absence.

  • If you don't already have a relationship with a home aide, you can find a trained elder companion, personal aide, or nursing assistant at a local home health agency or a local in-home care service.

Note: Hospitals will sometimes provide a "sitter" for those patients who require extra monitoring and supervision. However, these sitters may not be trained to work with people with dementia. Many of them will do little more than alert the regular staff if the patient is agitated or seems to need something. This is useful but not nearly the same as having a dedicated companion.

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