Sorry that the rest of the family isn't more supportive of all the work you are doing. It might be helpful if the suggestion to limit visitation came from your Mom's doctor or other professional person involved in her care - so you don't seem like the 'bad guy' to the rest of the family. But you have every right to limit visits to what Mom, and what you and your family, can realistically cope with. Asking for specific help, even at specific times, is a great idea. Would some of the family commit to covering a regular set time so that you can get out? I know my Mom does better with predictable regular routines.

This may not answer your question, but my sisters and I work well together and were able to keep mom and dad in their home where they passed peacefully. We were fortunate that our parents had a primary care provider who specialized in "geriatric care". By working with this physician, we were able to access other doctors in areas of specialized care such as geriatric psychiatric care. We would meet at various time intervals along with mom and discuss what was taking place, how mom felt about her situation, and how to work through it. As time passed, we were provided with information at various stages of her illness which lasted 4 yrs. We also received a book that they recommended we read entitled, "The 365 Day". Between the doctors, mom's participation (as long as she could), and various resources we managed very well. We also found out that by working through geriatric care, insurance as well as medicare covered a good portion of the cost; especially visiting nurses and occupational therapy. Dementia is difficult on any family but it can be managed; not cured. Because of the training, support and compassion we were shown by the various doctors and resource personnel, we could explain to our families what happened and why we requested certain things that they not do or do.

In March my husband and I began the care of his parents. My father-in-law in early stage of Parkinson's dementia. Our adult children and grandchildren who visit frequently know what to expect and what they can do if they chose to help out.

If our mother were in a home as yours.. I would say company is fine.. but we are providing all her care.. no med,s to calm her... we have to get her up when she doesn't want to every 2 hours. she weighs 200 lb so that alone is hard. Comany seems to makes her try to assert her authority and then she becoomes totally unreasonable.She doesn't like music or active children. We often keep our friends dog which seems to calm her... people not so much.. she is suspicious of anyone in the house other then us,because she forgets within seconds who they are. She thinks they are stealing things from the fridg. etc.. She likes calm around her. She was always a very private person and enjoyed reading and writing in her journal.

Thanks so much for your response and wish you the best with your mother. surfergirl

My experience with my Mother's moderate stage alzheimers is quite the opposite. We are a big family, she herself is from a large family - she loves it when her children visit (and we do so every day, sometimes four or more of us at the same time) and they can bring their children too.
She loves to hug them, she enjoys listening to us talk and laughing, re-telling old family stories, hearing (though NOT remembering :) what is going on in all their lives.
She is in in elder care home with other alzheimic residents - they don't get the daily visits like my Mother does - and I see them dwindling into silence right before my eyes. It is sad to see. So I personally do not agree with limiting visits - I do agree that young children must understand it's not like going to the park and running around!