Caring for dad has become more than I can handle.
You are doing a wonderful job as a caregiver for your father. However, you are his son and this is the role that you perform best. Family caregivers wear out quickly because of the physical and emotional demands of the role. It is smart of you to reach out for expertise in how you can take care of your father. What I would recommend is contacting a care manager who is trained to assess the situation and make recommendations to your parents for the best care situation for their needs and finances. A care manager is an expert in eldercare issues and local resources. There is a professional association whose members are trained and certified. Caring.com has information about geriatric care managers on their website so I would encourage you to look at the other answers about care management services as well as to review the association website www.caremanger.org. Both websites can help you locate a care manager near you and your parents and describe methods for finding the right person to work with you and your parents. There is real value in involving a third party expert to help you plan for your father’s care. Your parents will always see you as their son and discount some of what you tell them even if you are exactly correct. Particularly since your mother is experiencing some denial about the severity of the health issues and needs for care for your father, having a professional coach your mother and you could remove these issues. The cost of hiring a care manger to evaluate and to guide about the best care for your parents is easily recovered by having comprehensive choices and making the better decision first. Your parents are very blessed to have such a caring son. What I would recommend is contacting a care manager who is trained to assess the situation and make recommendations to your parents for the best care situation for their needs and finances. A care manager is an expert in eldercare issues and local resources. There is a professional association whose members are trained and certified. Caring.com has information about geriatric care managers on their website so I would encourage you to look at the other answers about care management services as well as to review the association website www.caremanger.org. Both websites can help you locate a care manager near you and your parents and describe methods for finding the right person to work with you and your parents. There is real value in involving a third party expert to help you plan for your father’s care. Your parents will always see you as their son and discount some of what you tell them even if you are exactly correct. Particularly since your mother is experiencing some denial about the severity of the health issues and needs for care for your father, having a professional coach your mother and you could remove these issues. The cost of hiring a care manger to evaluate and to guide about the best care for your parents is easily recovered by having comprehensive choices and making the better decision first. Your parents are very blessed to have such a caring son.
I empathize with you Roger!My father, however, is in a nursing home and the frustration comes when we realize he could live at home with help...but we cannot afford it. Medicaid is currently paying but we are trying to get him home after 4 months. I live out of town and have the best job anyone could ask for. I have considered quitting to take care of him but my father will not want that.There are home care agencies but they want up to 20$ an hour! I commend you...but you need to take care of yourself! Find a respite in your area...call office of the aging in your county or city...they will give you information. My father has accepted the fact he needs a nursing home right now, whether it financial or necessity...as much as you may be against it...look into some in your area...we have the best in our city and they take very good care of him. Good Luck...BREATHE...!
