Is wanting to "go home" part of Alzheimer's, even if the patient is at home?
When she refers to "home," it's as an expression of an emotion. Home is where the heart is -- and her memories and heart are with your father and the home they shared. Unless she becomes too upset, try keeping on hand an album of pictures from the past so that she can reminisce about her life. When she expresses that she wants to "go home," just validate how special that time of life was for her.
If she has progressed to the stage of dementia where she has no touch with reality, it often works best , the house is being repainted right now." Or, "The house is being rented so someone else is living in it right now." Remember this is not lying, but helping the person live comfortably in their world.
hi- when my mom who has alzheimers says she wants to go home, she means her bed. i tell her we have to eat dinner first and wait for the dark. she really doesnt understand that because she keeps repeating it all day.
I recently went through this with my mother... AD since 2005. I agree this is an expression of emotion, where she feels comfortable. My mother has lived in the same house for 15 years, however I believe this emotion is tied to where her and my father spent there best years before his passing. (Charleston, SC) She would even go as far as packing her clothes etc up to 3 times a day. I found that simply taking her for a short drive, or out to get and ice cream really assisted with this, and found it was really "turned on" during sundowning. It is extremely hard to handle and redirect their focus, so hats off to your sister!! I hope this helps.
"Going home" is actually a catch all phrase for my Mom. She uses it whenever she wants something she doesn't have. My mother (mid-to-severe dementia) actually even says it when she needs to use the bathroom. I have learned to simply say "ok, we will do that but let's finish eating (or whatever else) first. It gets tiring to hear but I have learned not to take it literally.
My mom hasn't said this yet, but others I know say this because they mentally live in the past and can't connect to the present. Their short term memory is short and they well remember things that happened long ago.
My Mother did this a lot after she was diagnosed with a mesenteric tumor (Dr. gave her days to live, she lived nearly 10 weeks). My Father had difficulty with this - his AD not the normal AD symptoms - he kept telling her she was home - pointing out the furniture and such. I just told her we were on a trip, and that we would be going home soon. She would then ask me if I had my own room, which I always said yes to, since they lived in Assisted Living. It's difficult, but makes them more comfortable to know that they'll be going home soon.
Recommended for you
- What's the best way to handle criticism about the Alzheimer's care I'm giving my mom?
- What if my dad's doctor doesn't think it's Alzheimer's?
- How do I make sure my father with Alzheimer's remembers to take his medicines?
- Should my mom's house remain unchanged even though she has memory problems?
- How can I keep my father, who has dementia, from losing things?
- See all 660 questions about Alzheimer's and Other Dementias

