Father

• Interview - Talking With Bob Morris

  Bob Morris, author of Assisted Loving: True Tales of Double Dating With My Dad and a caregiver of sorts, reflects on growing close to his elderly father.

• Article - Bathing Your Dad: A Beginner's Guide

  Strategies for tackling one of the trickiest and most intimate parts of caring for your father when he's unable to care for himself.

• Interview - Talking With Kelly Corrigan

  The author of The Middle Place reflects on how family dynamics, faith, and lacrosse figured into her father’s treatment for bladder cancer.

• Interview - Talking With Julie Winokur

  Julie Winokur, whose film series The Sandwich Generation documents her family's care-giving experience, reflects on caring for parents at home.

Blog Posts

• Blog Post - I feel guilty about it, but I can barely stand the sight of my mother, who wants to live with me. What do I owe her?

  My mother is only 61 years old, but she may as well be 90...

• Blog Post - My parents are begging me for an occasional drink or cigarette -- even though it's against their doctors' orders.

  Advice on whether it's okay for elderly parents, one of whom uses portable oxygen, to occasionally smoke or drink.

• Blog Post - Don't Wait for a Doctor's Visit to Test for High Blood Pressure

  For those with high blood pressure, home monitoring is recommended by the American Heart Association and other major organizations.

• Blog Post - Universal Design Part 2 -- Breaking the Ice

  Universal design can make seniors' homes safer, but many older people resist changes. Advice for getting seniors to agree to home renovations.

• Blog Post - A "Sandwiched" Daughter Says Enough is Enough

  A "sandwich generation" caregiver describes how asking for help saved her sanity — and her family.

• Blog Post - My father seems interested in moving in with me -- and I don't want him to.

  At 81, my dad has Parkinson's, three heart stents,...

• Blog Post - Know Thy Father: A Guide to Dad's Day

  Knowing your dad well is a good guide to celebrating Father's Day.

• Blog Post - Wanted: Companionship for a Dad with Diabetes

  How to find senior companionship for your aging and ailing parent.

• Blog Post - Medicare Headaches

  Navigating the Medicare maze can be a headache, but here are resources to help you along the way.

• Blog Post - My mother is gambling away every last penny -- and her financial independence. What should I do?

  Since my father's death two years ago, my 75-year-old...

• Blog Post - I'm not close to my dad's new wife, and that's keeping me from caring for him as much as I'd like to (he has Alzheimer's). How can I step in and help him more?

  What to do when your elderly father's new wife comes between you and him.

• Blog Post - My father's racist and inappropriate remarks have gotten so bad, I don't want to take him out in public.

  How to understand and deal with an elderly parent's racist or offensive remarks.

• Blog Post - Should I be responsible for my father's funeral bill when he never paid child support for me?

  My parents have been divorced for more than 20 years...

• Blog Post - My mother says she's lonely, and it's heartbreaking for me to hear her crying at night. What can I do to help her?

  My father died seven years ago, and for quite some...

• Blog Post - What Do You Give an Old Dad for Father's Day?

  What aging dads really need for Father's Day can't be wrapped.

• Blog Post - My father is in failing health and financial ruin, living with a woman who is bipolar, and refuses my help. What can I do?

  My father is 69 years old and in failing health...

• Blog Post - Aging Artfully, Part 1

  How you can age artfully by pursuing your passions

• Blog Post - My brother won't share financial information about our dad's assets, and it's tearing the family apart.

  My brother has durable power of attorney for my dad...

• Blog Post - After a Stroke: When Words Fail Us

  Creative ways to communicate with someone who has trouble speaking or understanding language.

• Blog Post - Insurance Coverage: Denied!

  What do you do when your parent's insurance company denies coverage for the care that his doctor has ordered?

• Blog Post - My mother gave power of attorney to her new husband, who is putting her life in danger. How can we get it away from him?

  My mother's new husband has power of attorney for her, but I feel he puts her life in danger. How can we get her to reappoint power of attorney?

• Blog Post - My sister's refusal to communicate with me about our father's care has brought back to mind years of mistreatment by her. What can I do?

  My sister is 14 years older than I am and has full...

• Blog Post - A Brave New World for the Old

  Find out how new gadgets and technologies, like housecleaning robots and Personal Emergency Response Systems, can make living safer and more comfortable for seniors.

• Blog Post - Call Us Cancer "Carepartners"

  When you're helping someone you love battle cancer, you're right there on the front lines with them.

• Blog Post - I constantly feel guilty because no matter how much I do for my parents, I know it's never enough.

  My mom has advanced Alzheimer's and my dad is 92 and...

• Blog Post - A Grandchild Steps In to Help Her Family

  A young woman with both a big heart and streak of cynicism steps in to help her aging grandparents

• Blog Post - How can I deal with my mom's anger at me for urging her to move my dad to an Alzheimer's residence, where he fell in love with another woman?

  My mother, who took care of my father through the early...

• Blog Post - My dad wants to double-date with me!

  What to do when your elderly dad starts dating -- and he wants to double-date with you and your spouse.

• Blog Post - How Retirement Is Changing

  A rundown of emotional and financial issues facing current and future retirees.

• Blog Post - In Men With Type 2 Diabetes, Bedroom Blues May Signal a Broken Heart

  In men with type 2 diabetes, erectile dysfunction may be a warning sign for serious heart trouble, including heart attack and death.

• Blog Post - An Unpopular Idea: Worried About Cancer? Cut Back on Drinking

  More studies are showing that alcohol causes cancer, yet doctors are hesitant to suggest that patients cut back on drinking.

• Blog Post - I took the brunt of my dad's nastiness my whole life. Now I am his caretaker and I resent it.

  My dad has been a handful all his life -- prone to...

Questions & Answers

• Question - What could be causing my 80-year-old father's repeated falls?

  My elderly parent falls repeatedly. What's causing these falls -- could they be caused by a health condition such as his heart disease or dizziness?

• Question - Am I responsible for my father's nursing home bill?

  A person's debts may follow them after death, but children are not usually responsible for their parents' nursing home debts unless they agreed to take them on.

• Question - Can my father's house be taken to pay for long term care?

  A house transferred out of an elder's name can't be taken by Medicaid but might disqualify the elder from Medicaid nursing home coverage.

• Question - How can I encourage my father to use his left side after his stroke?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I help my father get up from a fall without causing injury to him or me?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - Can I give my father a diuretic to help with the swelling in his feet caused by liver cancer?

  When swollen feet are caused by liver cancer, will a diuretic help relieve the swelling? Or is the cause of the swelling more complicated than that?

• Question - How can I get my incontinent father to wear diapers?

  My father, who has dementia, also has urinary incontinence and refuses to wear adult diapers. Any suggestions to help me convince him to wear diapers?

• Question - How do we decide between a reverse mortgage for my father or a personal loan from me?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I convince my father to have coronary bypass surgery?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - My father has bladder cancer and he no longer want to eat or drink. Is there anything we can do?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - What do I say to my dying father, from whom I'm estranged?

  When your estranged parent is dying, what do you say? Talking in a caring way to an estranged dying parent is difficult, but it's worth the effort.

• Question - Will cutting down on liquids help my father's incontinence?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - What's the best way to help my 250-pound father walk?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - My father has colon cancer. What's the best way to deal with his angry outbursts?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can we persuade my mother, who's caring for my dying father, to bring in hospice help?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - How can I tell whether my father's incontinence after his stroke is temporary?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How do we preserve my deceased father's estate when my mother remarries?

  To find out whether you are slated to get family property when your mother remarries, you have to look at the underlying estate plan.

• Question - If visiting with and talking to extended family members unsettles my father, who has Alzheimer's, should we continue while still remembers them or stop?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How do I help my father decide which Medigap plan is right for him?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - My father has had a stroke and has no will. How do I ensure his things are taken care of?

  A parent who wishes to make a will may be able to do so, even after suffering a stroke.

• Question - What if we suspect a trustee is mismanaging a trust?

  Family dynamics can make it hard to figure out whether a trust is being properly administered, or whether there is some type of illegal undue influence.

• Question - What rights do I have as a healthcare agent?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I keep my father from overexerting himself after his heart attack?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - How can I get my father with diabetes to eat appropriately?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I ease my father's discomfort when I have to help him with physically intimate tasks?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How careful of germs do we need to be when my father's white blood count is low?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I overcome my father's refusal to ask for help with his cancer care?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - The nursing home wants my father to leave because he's hard to manage; what are my options?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - Should my father be taking aspirin now that he's been diagnosed with heart disease?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - How do I get my father, who's depressed about being treated for cancer, to talk about how he's feeling?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I reconcile the debt of my late father?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I convince my father to stop chemotherapy that's no longer working?

  When is it time to stop chemotherapy? My father wants to continue chemo, even though it's stopped working, because he wants to "keep on fighting."

• Question - My parents are 81 & 82, my father was in a bad car accident...

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - Can low hemoglobin be causing my father's fatigue, and, if so, what can I do to help him feel better?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - What can I do to encourage my father to work on recovering from his stroke?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Why does my father refuse to sell his car after having his license pulled by the DMV?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - If I hire an aide for my father should I be responsible for payments?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - Any suggestions for talking to my father, who has Alzheimer's, about his finances?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Why are my father's heart palpitations getting more frequent?

  What causes frequent heart palpitations in the elderly? Frequent heart palpitations can have various causes, from anxiety to atrial fibrillation.

• Question - Did bypass surgery change my father-in-law's personality for the worse?

  Can heart surgery change someone's personality? My father-in-law was a very mellow, easygoing person until he had bypass surgery.

• Question - Can a parent revise or revoke a durable power of attorney for healthcare or finances?

  Can my parent revise or revoke his durable power of attorney for healthcare? He can revise his durable power of attorney if he's of sound mind.

• Question - How can I tell if my parent has Alzheimer's or depression?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - My father just died. What do I do first?

  There are many details to attend to in the first week or so after a death occurs -- and the busyness can sometimes feel like a blessing.

• Question - What can I do to encourage my dad to wear his emergency response device?

  This question has been answered by two Caring.com Experts

• Question - Is there an alternative to washing my father's private areas?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How do I get my father, who has prostate cancer, to accept help from others?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Should I bring my four-year-old to my father's funeral?

  Is it OK to bring a child to a funeral or memorial? It depends on the child's temperament -- some kids do better at funeral services than others.

• Question - Why do we need to donate blood for a transfusion for my father, whose blood type is O-negative?

  My parent's doctor wants our family to donate blood for his transfusion. He's O negative. Why do we need to donate blood for this procedure?

• Question - Is it safe to leave a parent with Alzheimer's home alone?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I help my elderly father use a bedpan?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Am I responsible for my parent's debt?

  Am I responsible for my parent's debt? I recently discovered that my father has several thousand of dollars of debt. Are parent debts transferable?

• Question - Why is my elderly father having trouble driving at night?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Should my active parent check his blood sugar during exercise?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I get my father to stop smoking now that he's had a heart attack?

  This question has been answered by two Community Members

• Question - How can I help my parent control nausea while he's on chemotherapy?

  My parent has nausea from chemo. How can I him control this chemo-related nausea? Is there a way to help him deal with the nausea besides medication?

• Question - Could my father's loud snoring be caused by a medical problem?

  Loud snoring may indicate a medical problem like sleep apnea. Loud snoring could also be caused by obesity, alcohol, smoking, and medications.

• Question - My father-in-law is depressed and has no daily activities to occupy him.

  This question has been answered by three Community Members

• Question - Is my father's discomfort a week after his angioplasty normal?

  Is discomfort after angioplasty normal? My parent had stents put in and has had discomfort, chest pain, arm pain, and sweating since the angioplasty.

• Question - Does guided imagery really control cancer-related pain?

  Is guided meditation or guided imagery helpful in relieving pain from cancer or other diseases? Studies have shown that guided meditation can help.

• Question - Any advice on how to handle a situtaion where my father's caregiver is taking advantage of the situation?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - What's the best way to respond when my parent with memory problems keeps repeating himself?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I keep my father, who has dementia, from losing things?

  Does your parent with dementia keep losing things? If your parent loses things often, a few simple tricks will help keep track of his items.

• Question - How can I get my father to stop yelling at me?

  How can I get my elderly parent to stop yelling at me? He yells at me every time I talk to him now that he's elderly, scared, and depressed.

• Question - How do we deal with my deceased father's estate without a will?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - How do I convince my father to use a walker?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - How can I minimize the damage caused to the furniture by my incontinent father?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - What is a MUGA test?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How should we deal with my dad's anxiety attacks after his stroke?

  If a parent feels anxiety after a stroke, is this normal? Or are panic attacks or anxiety after a stroke something that requires therapy or drugs?

• Question - How can I help get my father's sleep schedule back on track after his stroke?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Why are my father's abilities improving and then regressing since his stroke?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Where can I get free legal advice for elder law?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - How can I prescreen assisted-living facilities so I don't have to tour every one?

  When you're looking for assisted living, how do you narrow down the choices? Here are tips for screening assisted living facilities ahead of time.

• Question - How can I get my parent to eat without nagging?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - What can I expect regarding moving my dad from one nursing home to another in a different state?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How do I get my father to bath when he refuses to do anything but just wash off?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - Why can't my dad, who has Parkinson's disease, correct his bad posture or avoid falling over?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How do you deal with aphasia?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - What's an assisted-living community fee and how much is it?

  What is an assisted living community fee? Is it usual for assisted living communities to charge community fees upon move-in?

• Question - My father is completely disabled but refuses to accept 24 hour care or live in a nursing home. How can I get him to accept more help?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can I help my demanding father -- without neglecting the rest of my life?

  My father is in a comfortable living situation, yet still seems to need constant attention

• Question - My 84 yr. old father needs physical therapy for his broken hip that now has a pin in it. Can you please send me instructions?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Is there an adult-styled crib that will prevent my father from getting out of bed?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - What or how do I get help, for a 76 yr old father drinking to the point of falling down?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - My father died I want to know if he is still watching over...

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - Should we try to get a competency hearing to overtake my partner's father's care?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - Is it bad for my 92 year old father to eat McDonald's every morning?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - How do I make sure my father with Alzheimer's remembers to take his medicines?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - How do I handle my dad's denial about his diabetes?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Why won't my parent's doctor order a blood transfusion to boost his platelets?

  When platelets are low, should doctors do a platelet transfusion? Most doctors hold off transfusing unless a patient with low platelets is bleeding.

• Question - What can I do to help my dad stay comfortable during bath time?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - How can I explain the difference between dementia and Alzheimers?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - How can I get financial help for my father who has no medical insurance?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - How can I overcome my father's resistance to hiring a home health aide to bathe my mother?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How can my mother handle my father's poor nutrition and eating habits?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - How can I help my father, who is bedridden and has numerous health problems, face the end of his life?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - my husband doesnt understand severe fibromyalgia and how my...

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - Does the VA/State have the right to take over my parent's assets?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - How can I get my father to eat more?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - My dad was just diagnosed with mild dementia. Should he still be on the road?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - My father is withdrawing money from his accounts but can't remember where he's spending the money. What can I do?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - What if my dad's doctor doesn't think it's Alzheimer's?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Does my angry father have Alzheimer's or dementia?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - How can I persuade my dad to be honest with others about his vision problem?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Can I get compensated for my care giving duties for my father?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - How can I help my kids understand their grandfather's aphasia after his stroke?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Thank God I found a wesite like this! I am caring for...

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - Could heart failure medications be causing my dad's back pain?

  Could my parent's heart failure drugs be causing his back pain? He's had upper and lower back pain since he started taking heart failure drugs.

• Question - My wife and I have been caring for my 88 year old father for...

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - What financial help is available for caregivers who had to quit their jobs?

  Does financial help for caregivers exist when they give up a job to help? Not from the government, but other kinds of financial help are available.

• Question - What can I do if I think the trustees are acting illegally?

  When a trustee is acting illegally, you may have no choice but to hire legal help to right the wrong.

• Question - Are hearing aids really worth the cost and all the trouble?

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - How should my mother decide when to file for Social Security?

  Is it best to file for Social Security benefits early, at age 62, if a parent needs money or wait until 65 or 67 to file for Social Security benefits?

• Question - How can I get my mother, who has breast cancer, to be more active so she won't lose muscle strength?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert and a Community Member

• Question - What are some tips for a long distance caregiver to a dad with pancreatic cancer?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - I want to care for both of my aging parents. Mother has...

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - What steps are required to get a conservatorship?

  This question has been answered by a Community Member

• Question - Are nausea and fatigue a sign that the end is near from congestive heart failure?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How often do I need to bathe my parent?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How do we get my mother-in-law, who has Alzheimer's, to allow us to clean her house or bathe her?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Can you offer any tips for bathing an overweight parent?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Is hospitalization or a clinic better for lymphedema treatment?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - How do I get my dad to stop taking questionable financial advice from his friends?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Can the new drug Symlin help my overweight dad with diabetes?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Why is my dad, who has colon cancer have back and stomach pain? Will homeopathic remedies help?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - When is the right time to call in hospice?

  Hospice care is generally reserved for those who are diagnosed to be near death. But other options for help with care may be available.

• Question - My father fell in a nursing home and I'm wondering if the nursing home should have liability insurance to cover his medical costs?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - What should I do when my parent with Alzheimer's doesn't recognize members of the family?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Why do Alzheimer's patients remember certain things and forget others?

  Why do Alzheimer's patients remember certain things and not others? Alzheimer's patients tend to remember things that happened longer ago better.

• Question - Answer To When To Call Hospice Question

  Hospice care is generally reserved for those who are diagnosed to be near death. But other help with care may be available if your parent doesn't qualify for hospice.

• Question - We are concerned for my mother-in-law's safety in living alone in her home, but how can we convince her to move?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - Is a personal emergency response system appropriate for a parent who travels?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

• Question - We have had shared guardianship of my grandson with my...

  Unanswered. Can you help?

• Question - Isn't there a simple set of stroke symptoms I can remember?

  This question has been answered by a Caring.com Expert

Tips & Reflections

• Reflection - What I Wish I'd Known About My Father's Death: Filmmaker Tamara Jenkins

  The Academy Award-nominee on what she'd change about her father's death.

• Tip - parent with dementia

  After caring for two elderly parents for several...

• Reflection - What I Wish I'd Known About Nagging My Parents to Exercise: Author Bob Morris

  Bob Morris, author of Assisted Loving: True Tales of Double Dating With My Dad, learned that affection is more important than exercise for ailing parents.

• Tip - help getting in and out of a chair

  My father had trouble with balance and it was difficult...

News

• News - Fatherhood Tied to Higher Prostate Cancer Risk

  MONDAY, Jan. 7 (HealthDay News) -- Men who father children...

• News - Probable Case of Human-to-Human Bird Flu Transmission Reported

  MONDAY, April 7 (HealthDay News) -- Researchers have...

• News - A Health Gift for Men on Father's Day

  SUNDAY, June 15 (HealthDay News) -- On Father's Day...