Q. How were you unprepared for the progression of your mother's cancer?

Page 8 of Talking With Hope Rugo: Dealing With Terminal Illness

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A. We had moved to a bigger house because we knew ours wasn't big enough if she needed to stay with us, and we were converting a room in the downstairs for her. Before we finished it, she had to move into it. And she didn't stay there for long -- it was just months. So although we had made those preparations, we weren't really set up for the rapidity and difficulty of that.

Then it turned out that she couldn't walk down the little set of stairs to her room or do things on her own as easily, so we needed someone to take care of her. And if you have a household where both parents work full-time and there are two little children, you really need someone 24 hours a day. It's not like you need respite care for only four hours a day.

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