Abusive and aggresive father with Dementia

Dear Nurse Bon,

first of all, don't feel bad about this situation any more. Every family is different, and all of us have to deal with our own indivifual parents, issues and situations. I too spent many years watching friends having loving relationships with their parents and trying to be a dutiful daughter to mine. But if a parent is mean, hateful, or out and out abusive, that is a different situation. You've done the best you can for your father. We have many members on the site who are in the same situation you are, enduring ill treatment from a parent who's dementia, alcoholism, or other issue makes them verbally or physically abusive. If you look through other threads in the groups section and also through our expert questions and answers, you'll see this topic discussed over and over. It might make you feel better to know you're not alone. You also might want to read our advice column, Family Advisor, which deals with this as well. The post that is going to be published on Monday deals with exactly the situation you describe.Here's the link:http://www.caring.com/blogs/family-advisor

Again, the article won't appear until Monday but check back then, I think you'll find the advice valuable.

Hi Nurse Bon,

I agree with Melanie. You've done all you can. There are some things you just can't do and maintain your own quality of life. Visit or write when you can and otherwise, recognize that the father you did know has changed to even more abusive and you've done all you can. I'm so sorry. (((HUGS)))