I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 01:36 PM November 22, 2009

octoman — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 13:36:25 -0000

PT Cruse Funny you should say that,I qualifeid as a cook in the RAF,and worked under civilian chefs,but my wife has a gift for cooking and I dont, She has to guide me over our phone intercom ,for me to cook anything that needs a bit of care,to get just right, Both my daughters are good cooks but my wife beats them both,

My wife has all the housewife skills from dressmaking,to gardening. I look after weeds and dig up flowers, Not a good start, Ann disturbed her 3 prolaped disc's back getting off her commode first thing this morning,she was in agony.

I applied a rub to it,that eased the pain.she is a bit more comfortable now, my daughter just e-mailed me to tell me her husband has cut his hand very badly,he bleeds very heavily.I guess this the website of pain,and misfortune.and hope.so I am in the right place,am I not. My heatlh?I forgot about that. I was so busy telling Ann how she will be alright,not to worry. I forget about poor me.ouch,yips oh dear,I am glad you reminded me. Did I tell you of my new symtom,no ! well I only discovered it last night.I must have told you about my stomach cancer,and the new lump I had a scan of on the latest 3d all sing and dancing scanner my hospital as gotten. I found this lump moves? it has always be just in the the V shape at the bottom of my rib cage,well it has escaped from its cage,and moved up so can only just detect it,a cancer with legs?cannot be,a cyst or hernia?the doctor discounted those options will have to await the results of the scan, I guess.otherwise I feel great

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by PT Cruzr @ 12:33 PM November 22, 2009

PT Cruzr — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 12:33:25 -0000

Sorry your wife is down again. You're probably a better cook than you admit. My hubby and I generally share the cooking duties. He is a better cook than I but neither of us is starving. We make a lot of stir fries. They are pretty healthy meals and you can really add whatever sauce you like to them. They just take a lot of chopping of vegetables. My hubby makes the best chicken soup when I'm sick. And he loves my apple pie. Guess I'm the baker, he's the cook. I hope your wife taught your daughter to cook. It's an art and so many people today eat out instead of cooking at home.
Anyway, hope today is a better day for you both. One day at a time and we can all get through it. How is your health through all of this?

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 08:13 AM November 22, 2009

octoman — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 08:13:12 -0000

Spockula Schizophrenia the cause? I thought it was hereditary? It can be brought forward by lifestyle My mother got it early in life her sister late in life.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 07:50 AM November 22, 2009

Spockula — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 07:50:58 -0000

I KNOW the cause: Schizophrenia(many theories),smoking(emphysema),drinking(overall health ailments),& general problems with "the system" & lack of both family/professional supports. Now, that's just "hubby's" diagnosis'....I, too, have both physical/emotional problems,etc. It's all in how we cope with what life has dealt us. Not an easy task! Venting helps

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 01:58 PM November 21, 2009

octoman — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 13:58:08 -0000

PT Cruze My daughter and my grandchildren were involved earlier this year,in a accident,the car was a write off ,a foreign lorry was the cause. My daughter had whiplash the children cuts and bruises.but they are alright now.

I had to loan her the money to buy another car .until she could sort out the insurance:yes my family do seem prone to these strange occurances.

Now Ann is bedridden,(yes she has gone down,after yesterdays heroics) I will have to put my cooks hat on again,I can only cook with Ann's guidance via our intercom,she is such a great cook,in her hands,I am pretty good. Though I managed soup and cheese on toast,without her help today .Sunday lunch, is a different kettle of fish. Well onward and upwards.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by PT Cruzr @ 01:01 PM November 21, 2009

PT Cruzr — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 13:01:03 -0000

Octoman...Sorry I didn't get back to you before this. My daughter was in a car accident (luckily not a bad one) but it was a hit and run and she is okay but without transportation for a day. Anyway, I do believe that you have had your share of caregiving and also do believe that this website can help.
After reading about your escapades at the hospital, I can't believe the purse stealing but it was understandable when I heard about my daughter's hit and run. My daughter was in the passenger seat and the car made a direct hit at her front and back door on her side and she couldn't believe that they didn't even stop to see if she was okay. It's hard to understand people but I guess the other driver was probably trying to hide something because the accident was not his fault!!
GALOWA....Also, in regard to knee surgery, I worked in a nursing home for a while until I found it too depressing and many of the residents had the surgery and I could only see wonderful results and my son in law works at the plant that makes artificial limbs for the surgery so you are helping our local economy if you have the surgery!! But honestly I have seen people who previously had pain with walking regain their mobility and I think it is a wonderful thing to have done. Just don't wait too long until it can't be done.
Take care all.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 08:29 AM November 21, 2009

octoman — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 08:29:50 -0000

Spockula ,thank you for your wise words

Yes. finding the cause is quite a problem,at times.

But I believe seek and you will find.

Eventually.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 08:21 AM November 21, 2009

octoman — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 08:21:35 -0000

GALOWA Well Ann sailed through the knee surgery with only local anesthetics so she would have watched them perform the operations,but they blocked her view. she had a delay between each operaton of 10 months,the last operation left her with 3 prolapsed disks in her back,so that along with being very over weight,has made the benefit of new knee's much less than it could have been.

Ann also suffers from odema her legs feet and ankles are massively swollen she has to take water tablets to control the swelling, which in turn keeps her tied to her commode or toilet,for hours so if we want to go out we have to arrange to take the tablet to suit our needs . But Ann earns her medal.she has her teeth drilled and filled without anesthetics because of the double whammy of having to take medication a hour before the pain killing injection,because of her heart problems,a waste of good time Ann thinks!so no injection. last month Ann had a broken tooth,I was telling the other patients in the dentists,what Ann does,they were in awe as I am. So the knee operations were successful,but Ann did not get the benefit she should have, Ann is only 71 years old. bless her,and you.all

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 07:00 AM November 21, 2009

Spockula — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 07:00:52 -0000

Wow. Stay strong! Well.....can't stop "the cause" sometimes! Take care.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 06:47 PM November 20, 2009

GALOWA — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:47:17 -0000

OCTOMAN (SIR Octogenarian...)

Dear Sir O!

An "A+++" for you - for HIGHLY CREATIVE "managerial problem-solving,"

AND

a STANDING OVARIAN (oops!) O-VATION!! - for your Sweet ANN - in addition to her bravery medal. (I am "overly goofy" lately, just can't help it sometimes...)

Warmly,

Galowa

: )

PS How did Ann's knee surgeries go for her? I need two done soon and am always grateful for other people's perspectives on things.

Hates the Memory Unit, but not Independent at all posted by Soo @ 04:37 PM November 20, 2009

Soo — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:37:05 -0000

My father has been living in the memory unit of an Assisted Living facility for about a year. He does not have Alzeimer's but has a terrible memory and psychiatric problems. Before he lived there, we had him at a different assisted living facility with a full-time aide. His money was disappearing rapidly, and we thought this move would be a good idea, because he would get the care he needed at half the cost. The problem is that the symptoms of the Alzeimer's patients upset him. He is complaining that he can't stay there and that he is going to run away. He asks me why I don't just get him a furnished room. When he speaks like that I know he has no sense of reality, and can't take care of himself. Because of his psychiatric problems and some dementia, he can't live unsupervised in standard assisted living. Does anyone have any suggestions for other living arrangements?

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 01:09 PM November 20, 2009

octoman — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 13:09:12 -0000

GALOWA. Well I sorted it out. Ann has a bedside commode,a stairlift,and a electric scooter and she used them all to get her to the doctors, The doctor gave her a prescription for antibiotics . I took her home she obtained a urine sample I took it back to the surgury,just in time for it go to the laboratory. So I am back to waiting for results.

Ann is diabetic,also has angina, osteoarthritis,hiatus hernia,two new knee joints 3 prolapsed disc's in her back.had a hysterectomy,because of cancerous cells in her uterus,and a medal for bravery from me.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 12:39 PM November 20, 2009

octoman — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 12:39:49 -0000

Spockula They did not just try they succeded and it was full of money and credit cards.I was cancelling them at midnight it was discovered when she moved from the emergency ward full of riff raff to the normal ward were then she was attacked,and I had her moved back home;and home doctor visits. Everything that happens has a reason.is my motto,slightly different to your motto. My view is cause and effect.where if you can stop the cause you also stop the effect.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 07:21 AM November 20, 2009

Spockula — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 07:21:34 -0000

Holy Crap! Some jerk tried to steal purse at hosp.??? People suck! I guess one must take each situation individually! My Mom has been there for me through thick&thin. Yes, Hubby is important. It seems I'm the strong one when it comes to tough times, though. I'm the caregiver for sure here! I KNOW Hubby appreciates me.....just has his own "stuff" to deal with. Everything happens for a reason=my motto! Or, one day at a time!!! Serenity prayer(even applies for non-drunks!). Bright Blessings to All!

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 07:14 AM November 20, 2009

octoman — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 07:14:31 -0000

GALOWA.thank you so much I have always contended women are more intelligent than men when it comes to the important things in life,and ""I am only half a man with out Ann , my wifes name.I am in my eightieth year,Wow I feel great,except I am on the roller coaster again .I must get Ann to a doctor or the doctor to Ann. She is much worse but adamant no hospital,she had such a horrible time there last time, purse stolen, someone tried to suffocate her,awful. Now decision time,It is nice to talk,calm down dont panic,think, this site is such a boon.to me. Love you all.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 06:56 AM November 20, 2009

Spockula — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 06:56:50 -0000

I'm not sure about this one! Yes, life partner very important, yet, family is too. If I had to choose between Hubby & Mom....it'd be hard. I think my Mom has been there for me since before birth! Has done a lot for us, & means the world to me. One should NOT have to choose! Both are important! We must learn to care for both! If put on the spot....Mom comes 1'st.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 06:52 AM November 20, 2009

Spockula — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 06:52:29 -0000

I agree! I've been in both situations both at home & work! Yes, being appreciated is important. Plus, one must learn to appreciate their own worth even if it seems no one else does! It's hard!

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 08:23 PM November 19, 2009

GALOWA — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 20:23:47 -0000

Dear octoman,

GOOD NEWS!

You already ARE an OCTOGENARIAN... The day after your 79th birthday you ENTERED YOUR 80th YEAR! All you need to do now is to start your 81st...So,

HAPPY OCTO TO YOU...HAPPY OCTO TO YOU... HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR OCTOMAN... HAPPY OCTO TO YOU...!

Warmly,

Galowa

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 03:33 PM November 19, 2009

octoman — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 15:33:30 -0000

PT Cruz. Well I am overwhelmed by your best wishes

My wife for who I am a carer.This past weekend was having the same symtoms she had when earlier this year when, I had to get a paramedic in to her because she had collapsed ,they rushed into hospital . The weekend, she was in great pain, but told me she did not want to go hospital and would not let me bring in a doctor, to see her I decided I would have to see the doctor for advise,but hung back as my wife has gradually improved.today she seems alright. What a rollercoaster ride,caring can be at times. but I am so lucky ,I have a loving caring daughter.she pops in when ever she can my ,wife is also a loving and caring person uncomplaining. so no sacrifice needed. My mother who is now dead.had Alzheimer's and was totally different caring experience.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by PT Cruzr @ 01:12 PM November 19, 2009

PT Cruzr — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 13:12:36 -0000

Octoman....Thanks for your reply. Here's hoping you see your 80th birthday and thanks from all of us on this website for all of your caregiving efforts. Have a good day. Keep the faith and know that even if your efforts were not appreciated by those who you cared for, they would not have lived had it not been for you and those of us on this website thank you for your sacrifice as we all know what it takes. Happy Birthday in advance...

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 08:12 AM November 19, 2009

octoman — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 08:12:13 -0000

PT Cruzzr's A nice reply is like a hug, As I see it,there are two kinds of caregiving,the one where it is such drain on you,and the cared for are not aware of what is going on at all. And when the people who you care for are aware ,and show it. I have experience of both,this is where confusion occurs . People who have only experienced careing for the aware,cannot see,that careing for the unaware,can be totally different. Being appreciated is such a help. Well that is what I have found. octo is short for octogenarian which I hope to be next year,forward thinking that is how I am.

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 08:00 AM November 19, 2009

GALOWA — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 08:00:35 -0000

Dear Gibletoo (Judy)

You don't say whether or not your husband was in agreement about moving your sister in, and you give no clue as to her prior relationship with you and your husband. But it doesn't matter, because it's a no-brainer either way. Your husband is your life partner and your relationship with him comes FIRST. PERIOD.

You say "you are getting along fine...," then you say "It is hard to try and keep both of them happy," implying that they are both complaining... (not a good sign - eh?)

It is hard to comment without knowing more detail, like what is wrong with your sister, for starters, or her age, or how much CARE she needs as opposed to how much ATTENTION she demands.

But MOST IMPORTANT - in answer to your question - YOUR LIFE PARTNER comes first. Then you figure it out from there...

Welcome to caring.com!!

Good luck!

Galowa

: )

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 07:10 AM November 19, 2009

GALOWA — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 07:10:34 -0000

RE: PT Cruzzr's comment "... will outlive their loved ones long enough to enjoy their own lives."

No insult or offense to anyone, but that sounds GOOD to me...

THANKS!

Galowa

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 06:36 AM November 19, 2009

Spockula — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 06:36:54 -0000

Yes, I agree. Just being able to vent, & get it out helps!

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by PT Cruzr @ 10:10 PM November 18, 2009

PT Cruzr — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 22:10:30 -0000

I agree with you Octoman. Caregiving is so difficult so this website that allows us to vent can be very therapeutic. I find myself in a better place after I have vented and received some replies. It really helps. We all love those we are caregivers for and even if they have been difficult previously in our lives, we feel the need to help them when they need it. But I like many of those on this site don't get to get away very often and this site can be a mini vacation of sorts to clear your anger and set you back on the path that you are following. My new motto is "nothing lasts forever" and hopefully, I and others using this site will outlive their loved ones long enough to enjoy their own lives.

Recent Posts in Living Arrangements Forum | Caring.com

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 01:36 PM November 22, 2009

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I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 01:58 PM November 21, 2009

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I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 06:47 PM November 20, 2009

Hates the Memory Unit, but not Independent at all posted by Soo @ 04:37 PM November 20, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 01:09 PM November 20, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 12:39 PM November 20, 2009

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I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 07:14 AM November 20, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 06:56 AM November 20, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 06:52 AM November 20, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 08:23 PM November 19, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 03:33 PM November 19, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by PT Cruzr @ 01:12 PM November 19, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by octoman @ 08:12 AM November 19, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 08:00 AM November 19, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by GALOWA @ 07:10 AM November 19, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by Spockula @ 06:36 AM November 19, 2009

I'm being pulled so many different ways posted by PT Cruzr @ 10:10 PM November 18, 2009