I moved my 92 year old mom to our home when my dad died in May. Social Security is her only source of income. Because of her age, SSA advised me to become her designated payee. After I took care of the appropriate paperwork, I got a letter from SSA telling me that the ONLY thing I could use that $$ for is her daily living expenses. The special bank account I opened for my mom is subject to their audit process and if they see I used her $$ for anything else, she could lose her SS benefits! Also, if there is any $$ left over, I am supposed to transfer that into a savings account and, if there is $$ left over to put into savings, SSA might reduce her monthly allowance. Needless to say, that's not the goal here so I use her $$ to cover her expenses.

Blessed daughter: Why are you her designated payee? It just seems to complicate matters. Instead become her general power of attorney. That way you can sign on her behalf and SSI has nothing to say about how her money is used. Of course, you are using it for her care and belive me if you were paying outside help it would be far more than any SSI payment. You got to figure out how to play the game here, because it mean financial survival! Yvonne

I agree and i am so thankful to Blessed daughter for sharing her experience. I have had it "up to here" with "Big Brother"! To think we as children are busting our butts, sacrificing pay, and time with our living and breathing loved ones to support and wait on our elderly parent(s) who can be as stubborn as a common 5 year old; I believe we deserve what ever financial support we are due. The time we spend in care for our folks is priceless and is time we will never get back! I did the power of attorney because we never really new where his money was going. I can't begin to tell you how many copies of Dean Martin's Roast and WWII DVDs we would collect in our home!

Great question. I do have power of attorney for my mom and told the SSA that. I was advised by SSA agent Jones they don't recognize POA. I found it interesting but have absolutely no experience with this. I was talking with a friend about it. She told me she has been her father's designated payee for abt three years and SSA has yet to audit the account. To date, my husband and I have funded my mom's expenses until I can get a handle on her finances.

When Mom's wallet was robbed a few years ago; I called the SSA to get her card righted. They told me to send in the POA which I did. They talked to me as soon as I had faxed it over. I guess it depends on what you are doing for them as to if they recognize us as POAs. They wouldn't even talk at all to me until they had the POA.

I was just turned on to this support website recently and am really glad to have it. I appreciate any and all helpful advise, comments and concerns as I learn the arduous task before me and the intricacies of the incredible balancing act I am discoving this really is.

I think you are correct about the POA thing. I can understand the gov't trying to make it crystal clear what the SS $$ is for. We have all heard horror stories about people (often unrelated) taking advantage of and ripping off elderly people. I believe the people on this support site truly have our parents' best interests at heart. Thanks all!

It is my opinion that SS $ should not be dictated by anyone what the money goes for. Assumably it will be used for the qualifiying individual and at that individuals discretion. If they are unable to communicate their desires then the POA is a valuable tool. However I believe it is not up to SSA to determine how and what should be spent or saved and what expenditures qualify as such. My Dad lives with us. He has medical expenses, bills from consumer purchases and a portion goes toward sharing the living expenses. If at the end of the day he chooses to spoil his grandchildren with whatever he wants that should also be his discretion. The closer you get to the end of your life the more you realize you can't take it with you. After having contributed his entire working life to SS it is his money and no one not even the SSA should dictate what is done with his money. Big Brother is going way too far!

AJ Bars - Well said!!!

I totally agree!