I am an only child, only grandchild dealing with the death of my grandmother, the support and caregiving for my grandfather who is lost after marriage of 56 years and my mentally disabled aunt who is the only sibling to my mother. My mother had permanent brain damage when I was six years old and had full blown amnesia which required her to re leaRN EVERYTHING INCLUDING PEOPLE, SO SHE IS INCAPABLE OF ASSISTING IN THEIR CARE IN ANY WAY. WE JUST BURIED MY GRANDMOTHER ON SEPT. 8TH AND NOW TRYING TO GRIEVE HER LOSS HAS BECOME IMPOSSIBLE DUE TO THE OVERWHELMING LOAD OF THE UNIVERSAL CAREGIVER. THEIR MORTGAGE HAS INCREAD BY ALMOST A 1/3 OF THE AMOUNT THREE MONTHS AGO. MY GRANDFATHER IS ON A FIXED INCOME AND I AM TRYING TO PRESERVE THEIR PROPERTY AND ASSETS BECAUSE THEIR HOME IS BECOMING A MONEY PIT. NEED ANY ADVICE OR STEER IN A SUPPORT SYSTEM OR OPTIONS FOR SANITY DURING THE MANAGING OF TWO HOMES, TWO DEPENDENTS, AND THE PRESERVATION OF THEIR ASSETS? anything would be great. Thank you!
First and foremost take care of yourself. Do what ever you need to do. It you fall apart everything else will surely follow. Sounds hard to do, I know because the last 1 1/2 years I have gone out 2 times by myself. I have received no help from family etc. I am so burnt out drinking sounds good and I haven't had a drink in 20 years. Only telling you this story to stress my point. If I don't start taking care of me, there will be no me. I just posted a discussion on taking time for me and only me to get help. This website is a great source of info and caring, really good place to begin.
There is alot of help out there and I will comprise a list for you and e-mail later. I wanted you to know we are here and will help. Probably by the time I get back to you others will have replied.
Imelda
As imelda said, please take care of yourself! Is there anyone you can turn to that will help carry some of your burden?
In the meantime, please do come here to write about your frustrations! We will try our best to help u!!!
Hello, it's Imelda again. I just got done composing my reply and wouldn't you know it I deleted it. Good thing for you because I got pretty wordy. This time it will be short and to the point.
Charelene (on this website) gave me the most valuable advice I yet to receive. Take care of yourself now because things generally only get worse. In your situation sounds like you already are there.
Use this website as a resource. Once you become familiar with the different posting areas etc... All the information you need is here. Another website is "Cargiver.com" The homepage is "Todays Cargiver". Click on local resources for a listing of support groups, respite help in your area. Click on carelinks for an incredible list of material. Go to more resources, the list is endless.
Try your local hospital for classes. Some online class sites are Suite101, they offer a variety of caregiver classes (FREE). Try Alzonline, again it's free and a great learning tool. There are alot more sites but I found these two the best and again FREE!!!!!!
I found what helps me the most is being able to chat with others in the same situation. Just sharing our experiences is very healing and stress reducing. I hope some of this helps. Anything else I can help with send me a note. Best wishes, Take Care and remember to breathe.
Imelda
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