Hi there,

I can absolutely understand how you're feeling. I lived quite a distance from my parents for a long time and when things got hard, my heart just ached. Why don't you call your parents' local Area Agency on Aging and explain the situation. They may have some ideas based on the resources available.

Are your parents active in their church or any other organizations? Perhaps you could talk to the leaders of them, asking for some guidance.

Depending on what you can afford or what your parents insurance can/will pay for you can contact any local nursing agency to see if you can get some help. I am a Certified Nursing Assistant. I am certified by the state nursing board and qualified to do what you say your mom needs. Any local agency can provide you with a CNA or a Home Health Aide. Please don't let them talk you into an RN or LPN because it will cost more and quite frankly your parents don't need that type of care at this time. Check the Yellow Pages under 'Nursing' or 'Home Health'. Before you hire anyone check their qualifications. If you are interested in a CNA ask for their information and call the state board of nursing in your area and ask if there have been any complaints filed against them. You want your parents to be safe and well taken care of. I hope this information helps.

Thanks for sharing. Your situation is becoming more and more common. I have to agree with jorcna. There are a lot of very reliable in-home care providers. I would suggest using a nation-wide chain. It can often cost you more in time and money to ensure that an independent caregiver is providing quality care and they have a clean background.

If you are looking for some ideas on how to pay an in-home caregiver. There are many options: Medicare, VA benefits, reverse mortgages, long term care insurance and more. I work on a blog that is currently writing a series on PAYING FOR ELDERCARE. I hope that you will check it out at http://www.rightathome.net/seniorhomecare.

Best of luck, Bill

Hi, we have been in this same spot numerous times over the years. My in-laws lived about 400 miles away from us. We contacted their Area Agency on Aging. They had a lot of resources. Within the last two years we moved my MIL out with us and this past April we placed her in an Assisted Living Facility near our home. After having her live with us for almost 2 years it was the best thing I think we did for her and for us. She suffers from dementia and Alzheimer's and is just plain difficult. She gets 3 meals a day prepared for her and all kinds of outings and activities that we couldn't do for her here at home. It is quite an expense, I will say that, but for us it was the best option possible. You can also look at depending on where you are Senior Care or Companionship. Also, you may want to check out to see if there are any Associations in regards to what your parents have medically if anything for help as well. We contacted our local Alzheimer's Association before we went on vacation back in April and they were and still are a GOD send. They call and check in with us about every 4-8 weeks to see how things are going. If that is an issue they are a great source of information and help.

I wish you the best. It's not easy worrying or taking care of our elderly parents. Take it one day at a time.

Many states have Elder care Planning councils that are basically one-stop shops for families needing a wide range of care from home healthcare to moving services and estate sales to installation of grab bars to elder law. See if your state has one. You can also find an Area Counil on Aging in most states that can often give you guidance.