hi my brother just had pancreatic cancer surgery and 3 days latter he had to have open heart surgery , hes doing pretty well but he is getting ready to start chemo and rad ,,,,,,, he already get upset over anything and it has change him lots , does any one no what i will be facing taking care of him thou the treatment he want to act like nothing wrong and more i do to help madder he gets ,, im try nto to push him just let him be hisself but this is very hard for me as much as him so can anyone plz tell me if this will get better for him or what i'm looking at to deal with all i want to do is be here for him i have moved him in my home but right now hes mad at ever body just dont no what to do
Ugh! It sounds like you have a classic case of caring for someone is very independent. I'm betting your brother views needing help as a sign of weakness. And seriously...being treated for pancreatic cancer and having open heart surgery would definitely make someone weak! It must have all been a hard blow for him to accept.
I don't know if this will work, but when my mom recently stayed with us for a few weeks while recovering from surgery, the thing that made her happiest was feeling like she was, in someway, helping me. If I asked her to set the table, she cheered right up. When I asked her to do a puzzle with my children so I could work for a bit, she was thrilled. Do you think there is any way you could make your brother feel like he's doing you a favor by being there? It may make a huge difference and help his ego.
Let us know how it goes!
ty so much for the advice , i have been finding little thing for him to do and it has seemed to help lots he was very indenpent before he also lived in another state and had to come here so yes he has gave up a lot ,,,,,,,, but i had never though of it like u said so ty so much for that
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