Wife about to start chemo posted by m24 @ 08:53 AM November 22, 2009

m24 — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 08:53:13 -0000

Hi Evan. While I'm not in favor of chemotherapy & since you both have already decided to undergo that treatment I found an article that might help your wife during her treatment. I can't link to the article because their are advertisements on it and the moderator told me I can't link to sites that advertise products. But in short, she should supplement with the trace mineral selenium. According to the Life Extension Foundation, the use of selenium during chemotherapy in combination with vitamin A and vitamin E can reduce the toxicity of chemotherapy drugs. The mineral also helps "enhance the effectiveness of chemo, radiation, and hyperthermia while minimizing damage to the patient's normal cells; thus making therapy more of a 'selective toxin,'" says Patrick Quillin in Beating Cancer with Nutrition. Doses of about 250 MIRCO-grams a day would be helpful. Since it's a trace mineral, too much would be toxic, so take under your doctor's prescription. The safest antioxidants are vitamin C, vitamin E, selenium, and beta-carotene. Together, they block the chemical reactions that create free radicals, which can damage DNA and promote a variety of degenerative changes in cells. Chemotherapy and radiation generate free radicals; that is how they kill dividing cells

Help I am so confused my Mom was diagnosed last week with terminal lung cancer that has spread to the lymph nodes and brain. posted by m24 @ 06:01 AM November 21, 2009

m24 — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 06:01:47 -0000

Hi Kim. The only thing I can tell you is to do some research into the effects these treatments can cause on the body. Find and read the stories of cancer patients or families of cancer patients who have written about their experiences of the downside to these treatments because it's not something widely talked about for obvious reasons. I had posted links to stories about people with cancer who have caused their cancers to go into remission using non-toxic methods(of course I mean the methods highly documented with wide success), even when they were given up as terminal from their doctors. But the moderators deleted my posts and claimed I was "advertising for my own self-interests", so the only thing I can say is research on the effects these treatments cause on the body not just on cancer. Don't give up even if the doctors gave a horrible diagnosis, because I know for a fact and have also read about cancer patients who where told the same thing only to find a way to make their cancers go into remission. The key is to treat the CAUSE of the cancer not just to undergo treatments that treat the symptoms and signs. If you remember recently in the news Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen was again diagnosed with cancer even after he was treated with cancer 25 years ago. That would be my advice. Just as Mollybow said, "keep asking those questions." The doctors are only doing what they know and where taught to do. You have to research the rest. But don't loose heart because it's never too late even when the doctors tell you.

Dealing with the loss of someone to cancer...even after a great amount of time. posted by Edge Of The Rain @ 11:53 AM November 19, 2009

Edge Of The Rain — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 11:53:02 -0000

Thank you very much nana2009, I find it very comforting to just know that im not alone. I think i understand the stress part of it,...Ive definitely got soem of that going on around here. Thank you very much!

Help I am so confused my Mom was diagnosed last week with terminal lung cancer that has spread to the lymph nodes and brain. posted by KvH @ 09:42 AM November 19, 2009

KvH — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 09:42:32 -0000

I don't have any helpful advice; just wanted you to know I feel for what you're going through. Sending you a virtual hug from California.

Dealing with the loss of someone to cancer...even after a great amount of time. posted by Nana2009 @ 04:11 AM November 19, 2009

Nana2009 — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 04:11:18 -0000

Hi Edge of The Rain.. Love you name, you sound like a poet. : )

I think I've always had my Grandmother with me. It bothered me some when I was younger, but as the years went by, I saw her fewer and fewer times. And I got a little more life experience and realized it wasn't a scarey thing at all. What I also came to realize was that..it was 'me' who had a more open mind than most. Or..more like a little open window, that allowed this. If you are sad about something or under some kind of stress, it seems to work more. It's called a 'gift', but it takes awhile to realize it. I read a book once that talked something about it and it said that...if you're getting too much input, then pretend you have a pretty little tiny window in your head and you just reach up and slowly pull it down closed. And wave 'bye bye'..see you later'. Need some space. Sometimes you have to do this many times. I know, it sounds really strange.. But I've been where you are and it helped me.

She doesn't visit much anymore, maybe at Christmas or my birthday. And I only catch of glimpse of her smiling face. And a note. There is also such a thing as 'inherited memory'..confusing at first, but you also inherit their talents. : ) Best of luck to you...you'll be alright.

Dealing with the loss of someone to cancer...even after a great amount of time. posted by Edge Of The Rain @ 11:50 PM November 18, 2009

Edge Of The Rain — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 23:50:47 -0000

The only hard part with that is that i only hear the stories from her husband, nobody else. and i never had the courage to talk to my father about her because i dont want to spark an old flame. and somtimes i just get so tired of seeing her everywhere. thats why i signed up here. coming up on the month of her death and i get like this each year but i cant take it anymore. I really dont know what to do anymore because im so afriad to go to the one person here that i know would actually understand where im coming from.

Dealing with the loss of someone to cancer...even after a great amount of time. posted by LauraL @ 11:25 PM November 18, 2009

LauraL — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 23:25:56 -0000

Hi Edge,

Welcome to the group. It's very interesting that you have such a relationship with someone you never had opportunity to meet in your life. Your family must have really loved her, and she them, to have so many wonderful stories to tell that have made you feel so close!

I for one do think that souls come to visit us, to let us know that they are still around and being a part of your life. Perhaps focus on the positive and recognize the love and not the loss. She's there. :)

Dealing with the loss of someone to cancer...even after a great amount of time. posted by Edge Of The Rain @ 09:04 PM November 18, 2009

Edge Of The Rain — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 21:04:04 -0000

It's been 17 years since my grandmother, Donna died. I am only 14 however, so yes...I have never had the chance to meet her. Yet still i think of her often, see her face in the mirror, and randomly remember things about her from the stories i have heard. At most times I am at a loss for words, and I find myself stumbling over everything when it comes to her. I don't know what to do. I wake up crying in the middle of the night and due to sleep walking I even sometimes grab her picture in the middle of the night. I am so very lost.

Wife about to start chemo posted by beatbreastcancer @ 03:04 PM November 17, 2009

beatbreastcancer — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 15:04:52 -0000

Oh, Lois. I don't have the words to say how sorry I am at all the problems the three of you have had to bear.

You want to be strong for each other, and that's good, but sometimes being strong means showing each other when things are bad, talking about the rough spots, and crying on each other's shoulders.

That being said, you also should have other, trusted friends to vent to when you can't vent to each other. You said you moved very recently, so maybe you don't have anyone close enough yet, so why not check out the hospital/facility your husband has chemo at for information. Many hospitals have support groups meeting there for different medical problems, and also have information on others. The internet has many groups as well (you found us, after all!), just be careful they're reputable.

You didn't say if your daughter moved with you or not; it's got to have been hard on her to have had a hysterectomy, and I hope things physically and emotionally are getting better for her. Please, both/all three of you, write back to us here; we're here for you and you can always let loose with us. Many of us have had physical and emotional difficulties; I had breast cancer myself. We know some of what you're feeling; of course, every person's experience is unique to them, but some things are universal.

God bless you all and give you strength and grace to get through this rough time. Remember that you are NOT ALONE, and try to find the beauty and humor in life every day; it's still there, no matter how dark things seem. Please write back; we care.

Lisa

Financial Help to Full Time Caregiver... posted by cynthiac bailey @ 03:59 AM November 17, 2009

cynthiac bailey — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 03:59:53 -0000

can someone please call cynthia at 708-566-4550 if you would like to donate some supplies for my mother inlaw shes 69 yrs old with stage 3b cancer i just moved her here from texas please help us.she needs a wheel chair tub chair depends and pads god will bless you.

Financial Help to Full Time Caregiver... posted by cynthiac bailey @ 03:55 AM November 17, 2009

cynthiac bailey — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 03:55:32 -0000

hi my name is cynthia and im helping to take care of my mother inlaw who has stage 3 b cancer.we dont have alot of money and im trying to find help for supplies such as wheel chair tub chair pads for the bed depends i need help now please.

Wife about to start chemo posted by loispaul @ 03:11 AM November 17, 2009

loispaul — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 03:11:12 -0000

Hi All,

I have breast cancer. I found out in Oct. 2008. 2 weeks after I had found out I had cancer, my daughter found out she had cervical cancer. To tell the truth the shock was more than I thought I could bare. We moved in Aug.2009. After we were here my husband started having side aches. We had him go to the doctor. Well low and behold he found out he has non-hodkins lymphoma. This year has been a hard road. I'm only 51 my husband is 52. My daughter had a hysterectomy (sp). I would like to know where we go from here. We both don't have jobs..My husband is collecting unemployment for 20 more weeks. I am looking for advise because we both are trying to be strong for each other. He has started chemo every 3 weeks. Out of those weeks 1 weeks is not so good. I am so besides myself. I don't want to stress him and he doesn't want to stress me. So, please any help would be ever so helpful

Thank you for you time, Lois

Help I am so confused my Mom was diagnosed last week with terminal lung cancer that has spread to the lymph nodes and brain. posted by mollybow @ 09:01 PM November 16, 2009

mollybow — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 21:01:12 -0000

dear kim , i lost my mom on 5/10/2009 she han non small cell lung cancer which went into remission only to be told 15 months later mom had 3 tumours on her brain, we never did get straight answers from anyone , so my only advice is to keep asking those questions , i will be thinking of you and your mom, hugs and prayers for you both.

My Mom has had cns lymphoma for six years it has been a long rollercoaster ride me and my husband ar posted by chelsie @ 07:47 PM November 13, 2009

chelsie — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 19:47:07 -0000

im sorry

Just found out my mom has brain cancer. posted by momcanc7 @ 04:27 PM November 13, 2009

momcanc7 — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:27:49 -0000

I am replying to a post above. It is about her Mom who was hurting bad with a headache in the ER. Your post touched me and although I've been with Mom(and her tumor) for 7 years. But year by year I see the change in her. I hope I can let her go......when that time comes. I too know she will be in a better place.

Just found out my mom has brain cancer. posted by momcanc7 @ 04:20 PM November 13, 2009

momcanc7 — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:20:29 -0000

Kylee I so FEEL your pain. My Mom found our 7 years ago she had a Brain Tumor. She had 33 treatments to shrink it and it did, but still not removable. I too wish I had my Mom back. I have her, but not the same one I knew back in the day. I am the youngest of 7 and instead of her being there for me, I take care of her............When she first found out she had a tumor(her left side was weak), so at first the doctors thought stroke. Then realized it was a tumor..........after radiation she could still get around and do thing. From year to year she has gone down. She really doesn't walk anymore. We have to have a sitter to stay with her, while my sister and I go to work. Lately she sleeps more too. Her tumor is an Anaplastic Astrocytoma. She still goes to Church and places with us in her wheel chair....but she doesn't dress herself or clean herself up(i do that). God Bless U + your Mom and take care of yourself too!

Best friend's wedding is in 2 weeks and she just found out her mom has ovarian cancer posted by brokenangel1999 @ 12:15 PM November 12, 2009

brokenangel1999 — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 12:15:05 -0000

May all be blessed!!!!Prayers are with you all!!!!

advanced prostate cancer posted by octoman @ 07:58 AM November 12, 2009

octoman — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 07:58:29 -0000

surfer. Yes surgeons are always severing erectile nerves I think they do it on purpose?keeptng the population down,maybe. My wife nearly lost life after they sent her home after surgery. She collapsed and it was only the swift actions of her sister a care nurse that saved her life . Yes they had over looked something they should have noticed. The medical profession are so open to human error. I make many mistakes but only my life is at risk.

advanced prostate cancer posted by octoman @ 04:25 PM November 11, 2009

octoman — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 16:25:29 -0000

M24 Well done 10 years wow,I a mere seven years surviver. To me your diet must aid the immune system, Best of luck,I think you make your own luck so what ever,will be. but the more people who survive with out surgery and chemo +radiation, the more it might make the doctors have a rethink. 100's of thousands are dying of cancer every year,or is it from the treatment?

advanced prostate cancer posted by octoman @ 04:01 PM November 11, 2009

octoman — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 16:01:22 -0000

Well The cancer survivers are coming out of the wood work at last. For seven years I thought I was the only a convicted cancer case that survived his sentence. yes I received my death sentence 7 years ago stamach cancer had spread to my liver and kidneys, no operation possible,because you will die, once your cancer has spread,its too late,too late. So now I am some kind of freak, As for all these weird diets,if they have no logic behind them. I doubt them, I just know the body has a immune system that is designed to fight cancer,and so I do everything to help it,and nothing to hinders it. I do lots of exersize,eat good food,have no medication,think positive ,relax as much as possible. It seems to work for me I am fit and healthy at eighty next year. I am now awaiting the results of my latest scan, but 5 years ago a PET scan showed my liver and kidney growths were not useing blood ,which mean that they were dormant,but the stomach cancer was still active. But I believe do,what ever makes most sense,to YOU. If YOU think I am talking rubbish act accordantly. And ignore me. I only do what makes sense to me.

Veterans' Days Remembrances posted by LauraL @ 12:29 AM November 11, 2009

LauraL — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 00:29:55 -0000

Is your loved one a vet, or a vet's widow, or perhaps yourself? Has your father already passed, and fought in a war? We would love to hear their stories, and we invite you to share your stories about these remarkable people here.

what happens next??? posted by DolphinsCry @ 03:30 AM November 08, 2009

DolphinsCry — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 03:30:32 -0000

PS: Listen to your heart. You have only one life to live.

It may be time for you to consider: Find a full time job. Move to your own apartment.

Hire help. Find a Medical Supply store in the area, they usually have a ton of business cards and brochures for assistance.

I've been very firm with my grandmother lately. "If Scott calls, can you give him a message". No....you have a portable phone, use it.

I feel like I am being a real bitch, but at the same time...she doesn't want to follow medical directions, so.....

Do not let your family control your life as mine has. They got to live their lives, you should get to live yours also.

what happens next??? posted by DolphinsCry @ 03:17 AM November 08, 2009

DolphinsCry — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 03:17:07 -0000

Like a wise person posted:

As they say on the airplane - in case of decompression, PUT YOUR OWN MASK ON FIRST and then help others.

I relate to you. You are a very good kid who has had a bigger load on her shoulders than she should.

My grandmother pushed me to my breaking point in July. I'd gone on vacation in January. While there, she packed up some of my belongings (sheets, towels), and had a neighbor put them in the leaky garage.

I only found out because I've spent the past 4 years cleaning out the shed and garage. She told me she did it. She only regrets it because she knows that was the last straw for me. I've been verbally, emotionally, and even physically abused by her. That was the last straw for me.

I was in a car accident 2.5 years ago. Life is short. I turn 37 tomorrow and want to live MY life, MY dreams. Not sit here and take the abuse anymore.

She has a brand new walker which she won't use. She was prescibed physical therapy for her knees which she refused. She resuses the B-12 shots. I'm even too stupid to pick up a prescription from the medical office for her. Everything is somehow my fault. I'm now accused of stealing money from her. It's been 5 years, and you know what - I no longer care. I want a life of my own.

12/16 - Real Estate Exam date. For another state. A dream I've had for years.

There comes a time when you have to think of YOU.

You know what? It's time for me to live, and say goodbye to all this.

what happens next??? posted by me again @ 10:45 PM November 06, 2009

me again — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 22:45:52 -0000

You listen to your heart. What good are you to your loved one if you fall apart. I know its hard but you have to take time out for yourself. Seek counseling see your doctor you can only take so much. What do they tell you when on a plane in case of emergency. Supply the oxygen to yourself then small children you are traveling with. Its the same thing. Your grandpa would want you to take care of yourself. You know he loves you what if something happen to you with him still here. Remember you are a great kid listen to your gut it is telling you something

Help I am so confused my Mom was diagnosed last week with terminal lung cancer that has spread to the lymph nodes and brain. posted by msleahb @ 07:30 PM November 06, 2009

msleahb — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 19:30:16 -0000

Then by all means, allow yourself to be pissed off, scream and cry. There's nothing wrong with that. Once you allow yourself to feel grief (and that's what it is, anticipatory grief), you'll better be able to deal...make some decisions, be there for your mother, and so on. Take care of yourself so you can help take care of her.....many hugs and prayers.

Recent Posts in Cancer Forum | Caring.com