My Mom's Cancer Treatment Has Affected Her Mind

Hi Susan,

Welcome to Caring's groups!  I'm glad you posted.

I don't have experience with this specifically, but I'm curious...do the doctors feel like this memory loss is long-term?  Did it occur a significant amount of time after her treatment stopped?  My dad had radiation on his brain, but thankfully only experienced short-term memory loss.  It wasn't the same as your mom as he never used the closet as a bathroom.  He more searched for words, was at a loss for names and just generally had no concept of time.  Thankfully as time passed, his memory improved dramatically.  I'm hoping your mom has the same experience.

Missy,

Thanks for your response.  They aren't sure.  They tell us that she could be fine in time or one day she could wake up and she could be fine.   She does forget words and lately she has also had panic attacks.  I'm hoping that she improves soon, My poor dad also has COPD and this is just wearing him out.  also did your dad not want to eat. since sept. mom has lost about 40 lbs.?

You're very welcome!

My dad did actually lose a huge amount of weight.  His deal was that his electrolytes got all out of whack.  A blood test will reveal that.  Has your mom's been checked?  Once his sodium level got stabilized, his memory, weight, energy level and general demeanor improved.  Hope that helps!

Hi Susan,

I'm sorry to hear of your mother's illness. The side effects seem as much a struggle as the disease, don't they? I do hope your mother's memory returns and that your dad can hang in there.  I'm thinking of you!

~Laura

 Hi Susan,

I know a little of what you are going through.  My mom died of lung cancer that grew aggressively  in her brain....She received numerous whole brain radiation treatments.   We learned how ruthless radiation can be....To save her life radiation help destroy a large tumor and numerous cancer seeds in her brain but along the way, healthy brain cells died as well.  My dad said my mother lost her person in the process.   My dad also had COPD and her suffering made everything harder for him.

I know that my mother knew love and felt love deeply.  Work with that in mind.  Just love her and remember who she really is.........Hang in there.....

my mom developed more tumors as a result of paracentesis. The cancer cells stick to the needle used to withdraw the abdominal fluid them embed in the surrounding tissue. It is a nightmare. The doctors are at a loss on how to deal with it.

Susan, I have to tell you that my story is somewhat similar but, ends with us believing that full brain radiation is what killed my mother.  My mother was diagnosed with small cell cancer in her lung (the size of a quarter).  They removed the cancer and part of the lung. Leaving her cancer free.  The oncologist insisted she have full brain radiation as a precaution.  My mother was 69.  It should have never been done.  The first week after radiation started she began to fall and be very forgetful.  It just got worse as time went by. They kept saying they "thought" she might be having mini-strokes.  She grew weaker with time and began with the demetia. My belief is her brain was dying.  It is the hardest thing to realize that it was not the cancer that killed her but, the treatment that was ONLY precautionary.  She had even asked about side effects etc and they insisted that it wouldn't do anything because it was a weak amount of radiation.  I am trying very hard to put the word out so that others don't suffer the same way.  It should have not have happened. We trusted whom we felt were the experts...word of advise...don't take their word and ALWAYS get more then one opinion. 

stacymsski ,

I have not written in a while.  We now have hospice at the house.  This is the hardest thing that we have had to do.  mom is getting worse every day and it is so hard to see.  I believe to that the radiation is what has mom at her worst.  do get the word out that if any doctor recommends radiation do not do it, especially if it is just a a precaution.   i think the doctors need to read this also... mom has been going to a military hospital. thanks to every one for the support. 

susan

Whole Brain radiation is not all bad,  nor is Sterotatic Radiation,  My wife has lung cancer, lower left lobe removed, and now it has matastizied to the brain.  We chose whole brain for the first treatment, in hopes of getting all the little tumors that couldn't be seen. Now we are still working on the seven that are anywhere from 1cm to 9cm.  We have been living this life for the pst two years, and I am thankful for every day that she is here with me.  Pray a lot, and remember that everything happpens in HIS time, not ours.

greetings everyone.  Just wanted to tell you all my mom passed away after fighting this illness for 2 1/2 years.  She passed away on 04/11/09. It was the most beautiful experience i have ever had.  I miss her very much. Thanks to all for your support.   susan

Sorry to here of your loss.  After being with my other and my mother-in-law when they passed from cancer, it is such a relief to know that they are no longer suffering.  May God be with you and your family.

Susan, I'm so sorry for your loss.  My dad passed away on 3/11, so my heart goes out to you in missing your mom very much.  We're here for you and I'm glad you could be with your mom at the end.  If you would have asked me at another time if I wanted to be with my dad in his final moments, I probably would have said no because I was scared.  But when it was happening in front of me, I couldn't dream of walking away.  It was overwhelmingly sad but beautiful. 

Missy,

yes, at first i was also scared to be there when mom passed. She was put in hospice the week before.. the people that work at hospice are a God send., but, i'm glad I was.  On Friday, 04/10,i had left the hospital and i whispered in her ear "Momma, it's time to dance with Jesus, we will be ok, I'll take care of Dad.' not 10 mins after i got home my brother called and get back up here.  When i walked in she opened her eyes...which she hadn't in four days. looked around the room and took her last breath... the hospice nurse during her passing sang the song "Jesus is calling you home." to add something to this, my brother(San Antonio Police Officer) was with her wednesday night till about 1:00 am. He went down to the lobby area, outside was a court yard with a pillar and a light that shined down he said that there was a lady dressed in ivory and had blonde or white hair. when he looked at her she lifted up her head and smiled at him. He didn't think much of it , went to the bathroom , came out the light was turned off of the pillar and he looked at the elevators, and the arrows were pointing up... he said that he felt such a peace come over him.. he went out the the parking lot and there were no cars in the parking lot except his.... So God will send us comfort. Missy I'm so sorry for you loss.  The days have been very difficult..... God Bless all of you

What a beautiful story, Susan.  It certainly sounds like there was some divine intervention going on with your family.  Those signs have brought me so much comfort in my own situation.

I'll be thinking about you.

OH Susan, what beautiful stories! What uplifting promise. I am sorry for your loss but oh the beauty of your stories. Thanks for sharing those with us!

~Laura

My mom passed away on 6/19/08 from lung cancer that spread into her liver.  She had lung cancer 7 years before that and they removed the upper portion of her lobe and she didn't need any chemo or radiation.  She was very lucky.  When the lung cancer came back in January of 2008, it was in a different location and was already Stage IV when discovered and had spread into her liver.  My mom was told she had 6-12 months to live!  We were devastated.  My mom went thru about 4 rounds of chemo and each time she got sicker and weaker and she slept almost all the time and she started falling and also couldn't get the words out.  It was so hard to see her body deteriorate like this.  My dad was her care giver and this was so hard on him.  Toward the end, we had hospice, but she died a short time after that.  Right before my mom passed away, she opened her eyes (which she hadn't done in 4 days - which was Father's Day) and my dad told her "just let go" and she closed her eyes, took a breath, and then it was over.  I miss her so much and this is my first Mother's Day without my mom.

My Mother has been diagnosed with stage 3 lung cancer and I am terrified.  She had a scan and it had not spread anywhere else.  I hear there is a new vaccine out that increases survival time, does anyone know anything about this?

hi Vern! you might make this a new topic so it's better seen and perhaps get a better answer. :)

chrish..

im praying for u especially with tomorrow being mothers day...it will be the hardest for me to go through. i do not have children and it was always a special day with me and my mom..it is almost to the day a month ago that my mom passed. just keep asking God to help u..and it is ok to get angry...i go through so many different emotions each and every day.. i do not think about tomorrow, i think about the next moment..my dad as well was my moms caregiver they were married 56 years.. spend time with your dad.. each and every moment is a new one.sometimes i feel that i have cried all the tears that i can but, before i know it here they come again..let them flow for it is a part of the grieving process... find something that will help u.  I started walking everyday that way i talk to my mom often...carry your moms spirit with you at all times.  yes this is hard..listen to the Allen Jackson song."Sissy's Song" God be with u and i will think about you tomorrow..

Vern    My brother was diagnosed with stage 3 lung cancer in March, and it has now turned to stage 4.  It is the same cancer that took my oldest brother Alan 17 yrs ago.  I think the  vaccine you are referring to is called Lucanix . There is a website that my sister found and sent to me.  I will get it and send it to this site.  Susan                                                                                                                                                                                   

vern       Here is the web site for the vaccine info  Good luck!       http://health.msn.com/health-topics/vaccinations/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100237895&Gt1=31049 [msn.com]         I hope it helps you a little bit     susan

Hi,  Have the Doctors check her diabetes and surgar level and than check often after. 

I am sorry for your loss, and yet happy that it was a beautiful experience for you. I have been a registered nurse for over 35 years, and I have been with many people when they died. I, too, have seen some beautiful experiences as some people die. It is usually when the person is ready to die both physically and spiritually, and the famly is supportive of what the patient desires. I have witnessed some things with patients that people may say could not occur. I am very happy that you were there at the time of her death and helped her pass from this life. I am SURE that your support was a tremendous help to your mother.
I thank you from her...

my mum has breast cancer and it has spread to the lymphnodes under her arm which she oringinally had removed on the 1st of july 2009, a few weeks later her consultant checked her over and noticed another lump, it was investigated and the results came back that there was another tumour in there, we were totally shocked that it wasnt noticed before and the doctor said that it would have been there from the very beginning, it started off at 1 cm. my mum started chemo therapy on the 13th of august(the day after her birthday) she has lost all of her hair and everything, she go a blood clott about 2 weeks ago and also got an infection in her blood which was terribel and also she is allergic to every type of sick tablet which is unfortunate because she cant have them with her chemo anymore. today she had an mri scan to check if the tumour had shrunk and if the cancer had spread into her other breast and unfortunately it had enlarged by about 3cm, so its now 4 cm big which is very bad! and also the chemo is not working!! i cannot believe it, i feel sick to my stomach, i have never been so worried in my whole life, my mum is my best friend and i cant live without her im so worried!!:( now she will need immediate surgery to have a mastectomy which is to fully remove her breast and after that she will nedd to finish off her 6 month cycle of chemo and then have her cycle of radiotherapy, oh and on top of everything the cancer is the most agressive form and has spread to her blood vessels!!+before she started chemo she was told that if she didnt start it then she would be dead within 8 months but as the chemo hasnt worked, 3 months have been wasted! it seems like its one thing after another and im only 14 and am going out of my mind. my beautiful mum is only 37 and yet so ill, its horrible to see. Does anybody know that if one chemo doesnt work then what happens next? do they try another chemo ?

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