'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by rellim @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

rellim — Thu, 27 Jan 2011 11:35:10 -0000

It all depends on her income , if she is medicaid she will qualify for lots of help, if she is Medicare, sorry to say there is not much out there without paying out of pocket. I had this problem with my Dad while I was caring for him. I finally had to hire help and pay from his check. We could only afford 2 days a week at 4 hours a day. But it was better than nothing! The "Area Agency ON Ageing" may be able to help you figure out where you stand on qualifying for help. Also they may be able to set you up with private pay people, but be sure and do a good background check. There are so many dishonest people out there it just boggles my mind. Also contact your local Health Office, they may know where to turn! Hope this helps.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by deputy158 @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

deputy158 — Thu, 27 Jan 2011 06:54:47 -0000

My wife and I take care of her Mom in our house. She has moderate dimensia. We have trouble getting her to take a shower. She normally fusses for a while and then gives in. Occassionally we have to just back off and try again later. She is a very big woman. My concern is if she should fall and how who we get her back up. We had her in assisted living about 6 years ago but brought her home because we didn't feel she was getting adequate help and every time you turned around they were adding an additional expense for diabetic testing, medication dispensing and showing. We want to keep her with us as long as possible. We would like to know where we can turn for resources to help us keep her in our home.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by golfmanma @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

golfmanma — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 18:12:34 -0000

My Mom is home with me and while not always the easiest, it is the best for her. She is very happy most of the time. She cries because of the ALZ but it is great to be able to comfort her. We tried everything and there is no place like home. Bring an aging parent in to your home can be hard especially one with ALZ but it is so rewarding. As a caregiver you need to take breaks and exercise. I try to make sure I do not get over tired as well.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by LindaSD @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

LindaSD — Thu, 04 Nov 2010 05:35:04 -0000

I just wanted to add something not mentioned here. Most states do not regulate personal care homes. I have recently been reading that there is lack of proper care and a high incidence of health issues. They are not required to have doctors or nurse visits. And no reporting system since they are not tracked for abuse by most states. What I have read indicates to be very careful in the selection of personal care homes. There is a lot of money to be made and it is a growing industry with no oversight. In fact some of the reports are showing a horrible situation for patients bordering on criminal.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by Tropical @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

Tropical — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 02:10:33 -0000

ATTN: mocha

Every now in then bring her a home cook Meal and Pray over it for a Blessing from the Lord to put on weight. Smile - ask and it shall be given...

A cortting to your Faith

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by Missy @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

Missy — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 02:34:34 -0000

Mocha,

I'm so sorry to hear that your mom has had such a decline. But thank you so much for your update with new information. I'm hopeful you've helped others going through similar. hugs

Missy

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by Mocha @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

Mocha — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 00:55:15 -0000

Hi,

My original post was quite some time ago. My mother's health has declined a great deal and she is now in a nursing home. I appreciate your offer of advise though. I may have some info that may be helpful for you so I wanted to reply. My mother is still a fall risk and in a wheelchair. Only enough to get up and fall. I did finaaly get her doctor abd facility to approve putting a tray like attachment on her wheel chair, that prevents her from getting up, and falling or slipping out of the chair.

It is like a little lap desk. She keeps a magazine or puzzle on it. It allows her to do more within the facility and not be parked at nursing station central! Facilities often will not want to use these because they often considered a restraint in some cases. It is ordered for "poisitioning" purposes but it is so much more.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by HelpNeeded @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

HelpNeeded — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 20:05:32 -0000

Dear Mocha,

Being in a nursing center that has a lot of activities does not mean your mother will be participating in them. I think your mother's fall risk is an important piece of information that should be considered and discussed fully with any potential homes before making a move.

My father has dementia and does not appreciate that he is wheel-chair bound for a reason--he is unstable on his feet and falls. Since he does not stop trying to stand, despite the risks, he was parked in front of the nursing station all day long. I thought this was inappropriate and that he would do better if he were engaged in activities.

So I went to another facility who listenend very sympathetically, and said they has several activities throughout the day to keep my dad from getting restless and trying to stand. So I moved him.

He does not get to participate in activities at this center anymore. The event's coordinator was not able to constantly supervise him to stay seated while trying to engage the other residents in the activities.

After struggling with keeping him seated and watching him fall a couple times, they also ended up parking him outside the nursing station so they could keep an eye on him. At least at this locaton, the area is carpeted, has a radio, and he can sit in an armchair. So the atmosphere is a lot nicer.

I hope I gave you some information to consider. Good luck with your decision.

I would send you a hug, but I am new to the site and I am not sure how!

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by sunshine retirement @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

sunshine retirement — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 14:01:40 -0000

Mocha,

Have you checked into any independant retirement facilities? I am working at one now that offers a full range of activites throughout the day including exercise. There are medical services such as blood pressure checks, blood glucose testing, balance, hearing and vision screening, and other medical screening performed twice a week. There is also a skilled and unskilled nursing services available 24/7, The monthly rent is usually by private pay and includes the private apartments, all utilities, meals, activities, transportation to dr's appointments, and all the medical screening. The skilled and unskilled nursing can be covered by private insurance and or medicare medicaid. I have seen many residents come in from assisted living and nursing homes who have improved their health and well being in this warm friendly social enviroment.
My advice is to take a tour with your mom of the facility, have a meal, and sit with residents who have lived their for some time and residents who have moved in recently from assisted living or nursing homes.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by unique @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

unique — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 20:56:54 -0000

I am stunned. I have a personal care home with 3 patients. We provide as much service as we possibly can for each indiv. I am located in stockbridge. You can e-mail me if you are still looking for a place.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by Mocha @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

Mocha — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 22:11:10 -0000

Hello, getting to the Nursing Home point is a difficult choice. Of course, we never want it to come to that but often with a dehabilitating illness, it is unavoidable. It is like a trade off. You will not fall in love with any nursing home, the goal is to find one that has more positives, than negatives.
I had to come to terms with the fact that I could not care for my mother alone in her declined physical and mental state. It is neccessary to oversee the care of your loved one no matter where they live. My best advise based on my experience in this journey: -Determine most pressing needs for loved one. (Medical, safety,activities..etc) -Find a facility that you fell comfortable with.Visit many -Develop a relationship with nurses, and director of nurses. Make sure they know you. -Participate in care planning. Ask questions. Become an expert on your loved ones conditon. -Fight for all therapies availabl.e -Have family or friends visit regularly and randomly -Try to help them get involved with activities and find friends -Know what your loved ones med list is, and check monthly for changes -Take loved one to outside doctors and specialists if possible. If possible, take loved one home for holidays, and weekends.

I hope this helps. Good luck to all reading this!

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by rellim @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

rellim — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 01:32:43 -0000

To ? Where do I start? When I moved my dad in with me 2 years ago I wasn't set up very well for handicap either. We had a hard time getting him in and out of the house because of the steps. My fiance' built a simple ramp that did the trick. Also when he fell and broke his hip, the surgeon who replaced it was insistant that he go to a nursing home for rehab and to stay there. I told him I had power of attorney and I could take care of him. through the regular MD I got my dad transfered to the rehab right there at the hospital and after 2 weeks I brought him home. The surgeon didn't think I would be able to care for him. So a social worker came to talk to me. after I explained that I had been caring for him for 8 months and sometimes he was in worse shape because of pneumomia, and that I have been a personal care aid to others for over 10 years she agreed with me. Bottom line is I guess for once I stuck to my guns and got my way. I knew my dad would waste away in a nursing home , he does not want to go to one. Also I live in a mobile home. My fiance cut the door out of Dads room and made it larger so he could get his wheel chair in and out of it. My dad has gotten worse over the the last year, just a little at a time. he is now a full time job. he has normal pressure hydrocephalus,(fluid on the brain), his brain is shrinking and the blood vessels are deteriorating, he has so much wrong with his brain the neurologist is afraid to treat any of it for fear of causing something else. The neuro did say he was surprised my dad was doing as good as he was considering all that is wrong with him. I think maybe because I have kept him with me and make him get up an dnot lay around all day. I think a nursing home would ahve kiled him by now. Grant it there are a few good ones but most are not capable of doing what we that love them can do. If you can get her to your home and a doctor will ok it she can get physical therapy at home. Also a personal care aid can come and give her a bath. A nurse will also visit once a week. I like that part because it saves me trips to the doctor. My Dad is on medicare, makes too much to qualify for home based respite so he private pays. But he can't afford all that he, or should I say,I need! he may run out of money someday but until then I will keep doing the best I can. I don't know if this helped you nay, but good luck and you will be in my thoughts. rellim

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by Anonymous @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

Anonymous — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 15:29:06 -0000

i have been reading a lot of what you all have written and am getting the sence that i really don't want my mother to stay in the nursing home. She has been there for about 3 weeks and is getting physical therepy but I have noticed that (i havent been there that often, unfortunatly) she isn't walking as well as she was before she got there. she doesn't want to be there and is depressed and lonely because she doesnt see any of her children like when she was at home or at my brothers. Yes i am feeling guilty for letting her go into the home but my house isnt set up for her as far as getting her in and outthe door but. She fell the other night because she wanted the bed pan at 3 in the morning and won't call for the nurse because they are busy and don't come quickly enough for her. aMaybe I am just to close to the situation to be able to make a decision. Plus my brother will not let her leave the nh.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by golfmanma @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

golfmanma — Wed, 06 May 2009 16:48:00 -0000

Call her Dr. and tell him what is going on. If she has not taken her meds and is having a hard time he may admit to the hospital for observation and to get her meds right. Talk to her Dr. about what you need if he is good he will help.

Find the SNF you like best and have the admitting person help you with transfer from the hospital

to the SNF. Keep in good contact with the DR, he is your best tool.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by RevYarb @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

RevYarb — Wed, 06 May 2009 16:41:54 -0000

Contact your local Dept. of Aging facility and see what services they are willing to provide. They should be able to assist on a income level. Many times it is free service. Also, who is officially taking care of her, finances, appointments, etc? A power of attorney or Guardian will be able to more effectively get her into a nursing facility if that is the need.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by caregiver 530 @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

caregiver 530 — Wed, 06 May 2009 15:54:05 -0000

In need help ! I have been providing care for my 84 Year old grandmother with dementia She has been going down hill very quickly the last couple of months. My family and have decided it is time to get 24/7 care for her .The only problem is we are a middle class family she has medical and medicare but I cant find anyone to except her. The snf wont take her because she has not been in a hospital for three days . What can i do my grandmother will no longer let us in her house( senior appt) because she thinks I am stealing from her hasn't taken meds or at in days.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by golfmanma @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

golfmanma — Sat, 28 Mar 2009 00:47:50 -0000

I found our caregiver through a locl paper. I put an ad in and then started narrowing it down. You can do a background check on your home computer. We private pay. If your mom is low income there are services in CA where you get so many hours a week. My mom did not qualify but my friend who lives on SS qualified. You can advertise at church too.

My daughter lives with my mom. So we get her help she pays no rent bills etc so that really helps.

My daughter is 25 so it works out. I help with showers, cleaning etc. Our caregiver is there when my daughter is at school.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by snow @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

snow — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 23:29:53 -0000

Anonoymous,

HOW did you find your caregiver and do you have to pay for the service with private funds? Do you have any services that medicare does pay for?

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by snow @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

snow — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 23:20:52 -0000

TO BABS,

What does the wonderful ASL stand for?? What state if FI? My Mom is in about the same situation except was not advised hospice. It is quite certain they will say nursing home. I am in a very rural area and I would like to get the outside help too. Hospital says if the docs recommend 24 hour care I would not have a say unless I could afford this privately which is not an option. Do you think I am out of luck on this issue? What services EXACTLY DOES MEDICARE PAY FOR? Any advice & inf. would be appreciated. Thanks

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by AnitaP @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

AnitaP — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 02:14:30 -0000

Babs101, I'm a bit confused by your comment. "...She got out out the hospital and they wanted to place her in a Hospice situation - I did not allow this cruel treatment happen for a person that ..."

Hospice is not cruel. But who recommended hospice? A doctor? Anyone other then a doctor has no jursidiction. She has to lack quality of life with declining condition(s).

Personally I don't think anyone can really determine what late stage Alzheimers is. Brain damage varies. So someone who is late stage, might still be able to function. Where someone who is more cognitive, may actually be closer to the end. It is not a one size all.

But from what you wrote, I would CONSIDER THE SOURCE. Hospital staff may be talking off of their head and no very little about Alzheimers or any dementias.

Also from the info you shared, she doesn't sound end stage. It sounds as though you have her in the right situation.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by Babs101 @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

Babs101 — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 01:14:55 -0000

Hello, My mom is in an ASL facility in Fl. she is in the late stages of this disease. Just last years she started to go down hill - seeing things that were not there and giving all a very hard time with day to day activity. She got out out the hospital and they wanted to place her in a Hospice situation - I did not allow this cruel treatment happen for a person that still speaks to the people she knows and eats like a horse - takes her meds etc... they say she is in the late stages - with working with my WONDERFUL ASL - we have come up with that they will take care of her PLUS visiting nurses and Hospice aides and nurses with come to the ASL and all will take care of mom - the way she should be taken care of - she has paid into Medicare for years - paying their salaries and keeping food on the tables that want her off the system - So we are keeping my mom alive and comfortable with many trained people taking care of her and all but the ASL is being paid by Medicare.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by Anonymous @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

Anonymous — Sun, 01 Mar 2009 19:40:08 -0000

Hi Mocha. I understand what you are going through. My Mom lost about 25 pounds with Alzheimers. I thought perhaps she had cancer or some other systemic disease. It turns out it is part of the Alzheimers itself. My mother has a primary care physician through her HMO. I had her put on an anti-depressant with appetite stimulant included. She is also on Aricept for the Alzheimers.

Fortunately both of my parents are in a retirement hotel together, and my Mom has a caregiver 12 hours a day. The retirement hotel has Tai Chi, art class, entertainment, little day trips. I also arranged for Medicare to provide physical therapy (no cost). Medicare will provide a home health aide to come out for 3 hours weekly or so, physical or occupational therapy, home health nurse weekly at no cost.

You may want to look for a day care center for those with dementia in your area. They really need stimulus, activity, to do what they enjoy and are able to do. Family members visiting is important too.

Please feel free to contact me if you wish. My Mom is feeling better now that she was removed from hospice. The other family members listened to a "resident" at a hospital who said she needed to be on it. It was premature. It was depressing for everyone, particularly her. She is now happier, feistier. When the time comes we can always make that call.

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by golfmanma @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

golfmanma — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 02:33:50 -0000

He has a small retirement income. She owns the house and pays all bills including food. I know that she found him through an agency at first. He quit the agency and they made their own agreement.

Maybe you should see an attorney about protecting your mom assets. I believe state laws vary. Good Luck

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by snow @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

snow — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 01:55:41 -0000

When you say he has his own income what type do you mean? Is he actually able to have a job and leave part of the time?

In this area it would be really tough to find someone or trust them in the h

'Personal Care Home or Skilled Nursing Facility? ' posted by golfmanma @ {post.created_at.to_s(:post_time)}

golfmanma — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 01:38:28 -0000

A personal care home is usually a regular house with 5 to 6 residents. In San Diego Ca where I live there are tons of them. They are usually run by a nurse with aides. Cash only though. If you go to a

SNF, see an attorney. In Ca you don't lose all your parents assets. Have you thought about a caregiver moving in with your mom. The lady across the street has a live in. He is really nice has his own small income lives in her house. She provides the finances for the food, etc

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