Our family has decided it is time for our Mother with alz. to go to Assisted Living. We have never talked to her about it or mentioned it but she has just about daily made a comment about it "I'm not going into a home". I am the one who has to spend every night with her. Life as I knew it is over. How do you do this? After looking at the alz. scale I would say she is about at a 6 or 7 on a 1-10 scale.
Do you or your mother know anyone living in ASL facility? If so called them and talk to them or their family member about the ASL and what you need to know about finding a good place. You can also look some up in the phone book, or inquire about ASL at the community Senor Center.
Then make appts and tell the person at the facility when you schedule a tour that your mother is very resistent.
Take mom to tours of different facilities. Encourage her to go by telling her that you want her to have a better understanding. Many people envision ASL as a rest home. Rest home and some nursing homes are like hospitals and depressing.. ASL has individual apts., dining rooms, activities, and provides shuttles to shop, attend church and for hair and doctor appts.
Anita,
Thanks for your reply. We have decided on a ASL. We have the pastor and all of my brothers coming this Friday to sit down and tell Mom and planning to mover her Monday (which happens to be on my birthday). My Father was a smart man. He had Mom playing the piano at most all of the ASL's and Nursing Homes in the area for years. I hope this helps. They have two pianos at the ASL and we can bring hers if she wants too. I'm not looking forward to Friday.
My Dad says the same thing, but at some point, he will have to. Do NOT feel guilty. You are doing the best you can and you will check on her in the ASL place. It's just a scary, new thing for her but she will adjust. How did your talk go with your Mom? I hope it wasn't very awful.
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