Do you worry about developing Alzheimer's yourself?

I am slightly concerned about developing AD; even though I think my father's is more of a vascular type dementia.  I am only 48 and my father was probably around 76 or so when we first started noticing little eccentricies but he was not diagosed until 2007.  Only over the past 2 months has he entered the late stages.  He still knows most of his family, which almost makes it more devastating to watch.

I will definitely watch for the warning signs for myself and not be afraid to seek help.

This is really a big concern for me.  My mom has it, and 4 of her sisters had it.  I jokingly tell my teenage kids how to deal with me when it's my turn, but it's not a joke.  It really scares me to think that I will turn into this person that is not only forgetful, but also demanding and hurtful of others.  I've talked to a few of my cousins, and they worry too, and are making financial arrangements for their future caregivers.  When it's so strong in the family history, it's like you know you're going to get it.  This is hard on my kids now, living with grandma with alzheimers, but knowing that they will have to go through it again as the primary caregivers for me is such a horrible thought for me.  I don' t want to put them through it.  So yea, it's a scarey thought.

Not to downplay your concerns but for me I have no children so there won't be anyone to help or hurt.  Right now, I'm just trying to make it thru helping my Mother out who had a massive stroke and I am not sure I'll survive that since I have nothing but trouble with the siblings wanting a inheritance including one who lives 3 blocks away. That's whats on my mind as a try to decide how to sell my home in another state and give up my life to go and help her so, looks like the lesson is - be happy you have kids and enjoy them now while you are able.  You never know what tomorrow will bring but you can at least spell out exactly what you are paying and to whom when you can't decide anymore. People only seem to plan for death - even with a "lawyer" they missed this - it is the disability that is more complex and necessary to document. God help this country as we now move into the next biggest financial fiasco after the banking industry  - "healthcare"

I am very worried.  My Dad, his Mother and ALL his siblings had it.  It is a very real concern, not taken seriously by my Dr. in the past.  I changed Drs.!  Oddly enough, it was UNDIAGNOSED colon cancer that he died from.  Because of his mental state I believe his complaints and comments were not taken seriously.  Sad.

I too, am concerned, my maternal greatgrandmother, my grandmother and now my 76 year old Mom who's in phase II have it. I'm having a hard time dealing with caring for my Mom on a daily basis so I cannot imagine my two sons having to deal with me. My mother's only income is social security and even though I've always worked I don't have a retirement fund, so I'll be in the same boat someday. How do you plan, when you'll be the last to know if it strikes you. My mother made some poor financial decisions after my father died, before we really knew she had it. If anyone knows of a low cost insurance plan that would help with this please let me know    

I'm caring for my 98 yr old mother with dementia and I'm very worried that I will get it too. I have no children, and I fear that there will be no one to take care of me.  If I go to a nursing home, there will be no one to visit to check if I'm being treated right, and to speak to the doctors and nurses on my behalf.  Nursing homes staff tend to slack off on patients that have no visitors checking things.  I simply cannot get dementia or Alzheimers, I need my wits till the end.  I would rather have a physical ailment rather than a mental one.

Contact your Area Agency on Aging. There is a program...I think it's Omnibudman or something like that, to look after your interests for you, things like what you mentioned. Anyone should take a look at what the Agency on Aging has to offer to assist you.

Sorry if this is repetitive. I haven't been here long.

Mom was diagnosed with AD in 2001, age 71. I am 15 years from the age she was at that time. Yes. I am fearful of being the next generation with AD. I've been told countless times, "Keep reading. That stops it." What I know is that I am built like my mother, look like my mother, think like my mother. But there are also some differences. She has been on blood pressure medicine for many years, as was her mother. I am not. Never have been much of a pharmaceutical taker. I don't know if that makes a difference or not. I keep saying and praying, "Can I have all of Mom's good genes and all of Dad's good genes, please?"

My DH asked me if I'm trying to talk myself into it. I hate it when he says that. No, I'm not. Just a couple of days ago he said, "I know what you're dealing with. I've dealt with it." (On his job, patient attendant at the hospital.) I answered, "Until you've dealt with it 24/7, I don't think you DO know what I'm dealing with."

And for some reason he thinks I should've seen to it months ago that Mom was placed in a nursing home. He can't comprehend why I've been staying with my mother since my dad died. This is my MOTHER!!! And if I get like this do I want to be dumped in a nursing home? Actually, I want DH and I to take care of this in advance...like now...so our children don't have to deal with the guilt of dumping their parents in a nursing home. How I wish my parents would have been less stubborn, independent and, yes, selfish, and taken care of this situation before we got here.

I am EXTREMLY concerned about it!!

This is one of my biggest fears. My great-grandmother had it, and as a young teenager experiencing that for the first time, I was both scared and felt a sense of loss at how she'd forgotten us all, and thought that the house she was in belonged to us and not her own.

I have those moments when things just fly out of my head. Appointments I knew about in the morning vanish from my head by the time I should have been there. I lay down my keys or my Palm or my book and then wonder where I put that. Makes me feel old before my time, and honestly, it scares the bejeezus out of me.

But Laurel, how much is on your plate? What is your stress level at this time? That does a lot to us. I went back to school at age 54 to get my bachelor's degree. I worried I wouldn't be able to remember because I felt like I was so forgetful. But I did it, with Honors in May of this year and I hope to start the MFA in Creative Writing in 2010, so I don't think I have AD. I think I just have a lot on my plate, a lot of responsibilities, and a LOT of stress. When I found relief from the stress, my thinking became clearer.

My DH asks me, "Are you trying to talk yourself into it?" Well, no! But I do worry about it some.

Yes, I do all the time!!  My mother is just 71 and it seems to run in the family.  I am an only child, married with two teen daughters, one of whom is severely autistic.  I am both physically and emotionally drained from taking care of my daughter and now I have to deal with my mom as well.  My husband understands and is helping the best he could, and my youngest daughter is a good girl but has her "teen things" that she is coping with and I'm trying to help everyone but myself.

Yes, I worry...but I worry to much.....

Do you get to take any time just for you, Laura? You have to have some down time for you, even if it's just a walk to get away for a little while. Take a bubble bath. Take a bubble bath with candlelight. Do something that you really enjoy just for you. Nobody can be on duty 24/7/365 without some R&R. Now, I need to take my own advice. I DO enjoy reading and I'm a writer so I do those things if it's only between conversations with Mom. Well, the conversations with Mom are the same stories from long ago that she has repeated over and over again. When she gets in the talkative mode I pick up my crocheting or embroidery work because I can do that and listen at the same time.

Take care!

Ah, thank you! I do, I make it for myself, actually. I fight for it! I have two jobs and three kids and a mom who is getting older but still quite, quite capable of caring for herself and asking for help if she needs it. But she's doing the same thing - forgets where she puts things, etc. It feels almost hereditary.

I know what you mean.  I look back and see the beginning of it with my Dad...NOW!  Things we blamed on his hearing loss, etc.  His own Dr. did not take his other health conditions seriously later because of his mental state.  He died of undiagnosed colon cancer.  By the time it was found it was in his liver and he died three days later!  I do realize that at his age and mental state he would not have had very much longer with us.  It is still a horrible thing to watch happen to a loved one.  I worry every time I have a lapse in memory.

I think all of us can see in retrospect the red flags that were there all the time. But the onset of Alzheimer's is so subtle we don't think about it being AD. This is a devastating condition to go through with a loved one. Mom says, "I wish my brain would work right." I say, "Me, too." She says, "I hate this Alzheimer's." "I do, too, Mom." "I wish," she says, "they would find a cure." "Me, too, Mom. Me, too!" But I wonder how hard we are looking for a cure if it's financially beneficial to the pharmaceutical industry to have more customers paying those high prices for those little pills. Oh, did I mention I also have an attitude right now?

Yes, I know what you mean.  I wish there was more progress made in prevention.  For me, I have made a list of what I call AD moments.  Dumb things I have done or important things I have forgotten.  My children think this is silly, but this list might be helpful to them some day.  Neither of my parents had this disease, but I know there are other factors.  I know I don't get enough sleep and have pulled some all nighters or worse, skipped a day of sleep.  I am trying to see how this all connects, especially with stress.

I don't think it's silly. It's called "journaling." The moment I learned of my mom's diagnosis I began to keep a journal of Mom's journey with Alzheimer's. I want my children and grandchildren and friends to understand it all later. Mom wanted to know everything she could learn before she wouldn't remember. No. Keeping notes is not "silly."

MamaCath, thank you so much for your kind response!  I don't journal forgotten names or misplaced glasses, although I did find a pair in the refrigerator once.  Sometimes I will ask my children, "Is this an AD moment?"  They will say, "Nope."  It is hard for me because just 6 years ago, I was teaching college courses.  Now, I just couldn't do it. 

I'm not an expert, Kariann, unless being the daughter/primary caregiver of my mother who was diagnosed in 2001 makes me one.  All of us forget names or where we put the car keys. Heck, I say, "Did anyone see where I put my cell phone down?" I lost the holster for it and can't clip it to my clothes so I tend to sit it down and forget about it. But finding glasses in the refrigerator? I think that sounds like the TV commercial where the woman is looking for her keys and her husband says, "I'll help you look for them." He finds them on a shelf in the fridge. She looks confused. He says, "It's OK, Baby."

Have you been diagnosed with AD? Are you on any medications? There is a fantastic book about AD. It's called "The 36 Hour Day." It's available in paperback and is considered to be "THE" book on Alzheimer's. You can read from cover to cover or you can read selections from anywhere in the book.Also, there is lots of information at the Alzheimer's Association web site. Google search it.

Me? I journal everything that happens because some things don't make sense to me about Mom's condition until after the fact. I'm trying to understand everything I can about AD. I hate what it does to the person who has it. I hate what it does to the people who love that person. It's VERY difficult. I also would suggest that anyone who has been diagnosed recently should get their legal matters taken care of. Mom wanted to take care of things, but kept putting it off. I won't do this to my children. DH and I are going to take care of things so our kids don't have to do this. Denying it isn't going to slow it down. It's just going to create more problems later.

I was diagnosed in 2007 with dementia by a neuropsychologist following three T.I.A.'s.  It's scary for me, but I try not to dwell on it.  I try to "exercise" my brain with computer games and puzzles.  I have days where everything is confusing for me, and I forget everything.  With Alzheimer's you forget and don't know you forgot.  With dementia you forget and you know you have forgotten.  You get to watch it get worse, and you try to change it or "nip it in the bud", but things still march on.

MamaCath, you have given some good advice!  Thank you.  I took the AD test and passed 100%.  One question was silly.  "Name a brand of pencil."  No medication except for chloestrol, thyroid, and anxiety.  Some of the things I have said and done are so ridiculous, I would never put them on a public forum!

GOOD SIGNS:  I babysit my 16 month Granddaughter and almost 3 years old Grandson.  I haven't made any major mistakes and note down everything (lunch, nap, diaper change).  Also, last year I put together this computer right out of the boxes.  However, it took me twice as long as in the past.  The directions were confusing.

Thank you for taking time to respond.  I took care of my legal things last year, just in case!

I will make note of that book.  I have been a member of the Alzheimer's Association since 1995 when my Aunt died of this disease.  It was heart breaking.

Dianne, I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis.  I am not quite sure what T.I.A's are but it sounds like in the early stages dementia is a bit better.  I can imagine how frightening that would be.  I think we like to be in control of everything AND not have things control us.  I hope your days are better than are worse.  Take care!