crazy

for me it's a little different...my Mother has become increasingly incapacitated and the longer it goes on the meaner & mean-spirited she gets. for me, the only "help" I get is from my nutty brother who alternately dotes on her and bitches at her. they have a very symbiotic relationship: needing each other for different reasons but using each other the whole time. I am the one who gets the call when there's a true emergency, but forget it if I try to say anything realt to either of them about the other...really sick. I'm about at the end of my tolerance for it and find it increasingly difficult to get involved or communicate at all...that, in itself, puts me on the outs with them ( especially my mom) ..like you: a no win situation ...I'd say: get some professional help & guidance. trying to make all of the decisions gets to you and you lode perspective on everything ( including taking care of yourself..which they will try to stifle because it takes away from them & they hate that )..good luck to us both

my bro has control over my moms affairs property ect. when my dad died. he seems to be wasting the money away. is there anything that can be done. my dad left a ton of money for my mom when he died but I seem to be paying her expenses out of my pocket. i do live rent and bill free in my moms paid off home my family feels trapped, if we make him mad we are on the streets and my mom is in a home.

Going Crazy, I'm sorry to hear you're having difficulties! I did some searching for you and found this page on Caring that might be of help to you.

Good luck and let us know how things are going! We have several groups that may also be of help to you.