Alzheimers and alcohol

 I was in a similar position hoping that starting Aricept would be the coincidental means to stop my dad from driving as well as drinking. Unfortunately his doctor didn't see a problem with either. The official Aricept website doesn't address combining the drug with alcohol, and alcohol does not seem to be a contraindication, although many doctors often advise against mixing the two. (The Mayo Clinic for a typical example points out that alcohol can cause side effect interaction with many different drugs and a physician should be consulted about individual cases.) All that said, it's probably a great idea if you can talk to her doctor about it. Some dementia can be alcohol induced and there are such cases of Aricept improving the dementia quite a bit; it may be better in such instances to take the medication even with the drinking rather than not at all. Her own doctor is the best person to evaluate and advise--

My mother in law is 83 years old and has alcohol-induced dementia.  Hers stems from consistent, daily drinking for over 50 years.  Her drink of choice was beer and she had at least 2 six-packs each day during those years.  She was in rehab twice.  So I sympathize with you.  The only reason my mother in law doesn't drink now is because my husband got guardianship of her about 6 years ago after her second time in rehab.  If she still had the option, she would be drinking today.  So although your mother still insists on drinking while taking the medicine, I have to agree with the other person who posted who said at least your mother is taking the Aricept.  Whether it is helpful to its full potential with your mother still drinking ... I don't know, but probably not.  However, unless you have the legal authority to make decisions for her or put her in rehab, it is ultimately her decision to continue drinking.  Best wishes to you in your struggle.

It's hard when you want to balance between what you want for her to do, and what she wants to do.  At the very least, you might consider contacting her physician and asking him to help her understand what's really the best decision to be made about alcohol and any medications.

Best wishes to you, and let us know how things are going!

My Mother-In-Law who is 77 years old lives with us and was as I am finding out a heavy drinker thru the years.  She is currently on Namenda twice a day and her doctor has told us she should only have alcohol on extremely speacial occasions and should not be driving.  It is a daily fight with her to keep alcohol away from her and the keys to her car.  She is still convinced we are making it up about the Doctor saying no alcohol and no driving even though we have a doctors note to show her every day.  She is like a bloodhound though and can sniff out alcohol quickly so I can only have a beer or a glass of wine when I go to bed at night.  The daily fight is really starting to wear on us.

Hello Anonymous,

That is a stressor! Daily care like that can wear one out, and battles just make it worse. Is it possible that perhaps an outside caregiving situation would work better for you all, assisted care facility?

Hello LauraL,

Unfortunately, an assisted care facility at this point is not an option due to My mother-in-laws children refuse to accept or acknowledge how much she has degraded with her logical thought process. To add more stress to the situation, we have a two year old child and one on the way.

Good day, This is the first time for me. I'm glad to find this web site. My mother has alcoholism and alzeimers. Its been a struggle. The doc has said there is nothing to be done. He will not give her any meds as long as the drinking continues. She is one step away from placement but the family has decided to try and dry her out and take all her access to money away. The drinking is the main focus of her life. She cant remember much of anything BUT she does remember her pin number and where the liqour store is. We are trying to keep her dignity in her independent living situation but it is getting really hard to deal with.

 Hi everybody, this is a topic close to my heart, as my mother was an alcoholic with severe memory issues and depression. One thing I wanted to mention is that as the caregiver, you end up being the one checking whether meds can be given with alcohol-- the doctors just don't get this and you can't rely on them to do this. My mother's doctor prescribed Celexa for her depression, a very expensive medication that her insurance didn't cover. One bottle cost almost $150! Then when I looked at the label it said in big letters not to drink it with alcohol, and her doctor knew she was an alcoholic. When I asked her about it, she said he'd  cautioned her not to drink while she was taking it -- as if that was a realistic expectation for someone who's addicted. So I guess what I'm saying is that even doctors seem to underestimate the power of addiction and seem to misunderstand that an alcoholic will promise not to drink, yet this is meaningless. Also, Jennifer I too had to take control of my mother's money and limit her access to alcohol -- she was having expensive scotch delivered by delivery boy from the local liquor store and went through all of her savings this way. It is actually a  kindness in the long run, I believe, to take control of the addiction this way; however, you should check with your mother's doctor if she will need medically supervised detox. It can be dangerous to detox an elderly alcoholic "cold turkey" without medical supervision.  My sympathy is with you and I will help all I can with advice -- I've been there.

Thank you for the support. 

 I am so glad I found this website - I have been struggling with the fact my dad still has 1-2 pretty good size glasses of gin each nite along with his other meds, 6-7 of them.  My mother feels he sleeps better, and my sister (who lives in the same town) feels "what else does he have to enjoy".  Someone mentioned on here that the Meds (in his case Aricept and Namenda) may not be doing their full job.

Living an hour away, I cannot not control things - this is just something I feel very strongly about.

Thank you again

I am so glad to find this website.  I need to alk to others in the same situation.  My Mom is heavy wine drinker and now showing signs of dementia.  We moved her next door to be close so I could watch out for her.  It has become way too much for me to handle alone.  I have 3 other siblings near us that could help, but they do not.  The visiting nurse has already said that she needs to have someone with her or move into assisted living right away.   I can take care of my Mom most of the time, but I need some relief every now and then.  How do you get your siblings on the ball to help?

Signed, very tired irish woman

I'm glad I found this conversation.  I am caring for couple in their mid-80s with mid-stage Alzheimer's, both taking Aricept.  Never heard a word from doctor about any contraindication.  (I agree with previous posters that internal medicine physicians don't really seem to be paying attention to this.)  They are from the generation of a cocktail a day at 5:00 before dinner.  One of my clients complained of nausea which increased to the point she didn't feel like doing anything. Family suspected wine consumption might be exacerbating her condition (history of fussy stomach all her life), if not causing nausea.  Symptoms were identical to hangover since she usually felt fine by mid afternoon and was ready for her nightly wine.

We were able to remove wine for a month and the difference was incredible.  We posted a note on frig--written on doctor's prescription form--no wine for 2 weeks.  It was a daily discussion and they were not happy, but followed and we implemented it for a month before returning the wine.  They tolerated wine after the abstinence for months (consuming a bottle a day between the two of them) before nausea symptoms gradually reappeared.

They have both said they have lived long, wonderful lives and do not care to go on forever, so they are back to their life-long pleasure of nightly wine.  At this point, my main concern is falls.  I am going to recommend family find a geriatrician to replace their regular doctor (internal medicine only).

Thanks for your information and comments.

My father-in-law just moved to our neighborhood.  He has lived 5 hours away for the past 16 years, so we have not spent a lot of time with him on a day to day basis.  He drinks 5-6 glasses of wine every evening then comes over to my house, after he eats dinner every night.  He only spends about 20 or 30 minutes over here, because he wants to get to bed.  But when he is over here, he garbles over 60% of his words.  He tries to tell me what frozen dinner he had for dinner, and can't remember the words.  The last time he had spaghetti & meatballs, he called it pasta & meatrocks.  My husband is an architect, and he refers to him as an archaelogist.  My brother in law has a phd in criminal justice, and he talks about him like he is an m.d.  He is unable to listen to a conversation and contribute to it.  It's like he has his own stream of thought, that is not related to anyone else.  I don't know if he has alcohol related dementia, or alzheimers, or something else. 

I have been trying to get my husband or brother-in-law to go to the doctor with him, to get him evaluated.  It is very frustrating, because I am the one that has to deal with him.  And I am the one that has to explain to our kids (ages 9,11,13) what is wrong with Pops.  I guess the only good thing out of this, is that they know first hand how stupid drinking alcohol is. 

If anyone has any pointers on talking to a relative about getting evaluated for dementia, when they are very defensive, it would be much appreciated.

Jennifer,

Hi! ---  My sister's MIL was having just weird issues - them not being sure if dementia was involved.  She had high blood pressure, so during a routine check-up her son went with her and on the side mentioned the issue to her doctor (he may have called ahead - not sure). Her doctor took it from there. 

My dad was diagnosed also by their family doctor, but he knew he was going to find out why his memory was failing.  (That was 3 years ago).

Best of luck - it sounds like you already have your hands full -Cathy

Jennifer, it sounds like your father-in-law has a complicated set of factors going on, but if he's drinking 5-6 glasses of wine after dinner, this could definitely be one cause of this behavior. Alcohol affects the elderly more strongly than younger people, so drinking that much could definitely cause him to garble words, use the wrong word, have memory lapses, and the other things you describe. If he is also having some dementia and other health issues, it  coudl be an interaction of all those factors. My mother was an alcoholic, and I experienced some of the things you're describing. If your father-in-law does not acknowledge having a drinking problem, then you could ask him to see a doctor to have his symptoms evaluated without mentioning the drinking to him. But then when you (or whoever does so) take him to see the doctor, you could ask to speak to the doctor and mention his alcohol intake and ask if that could be contributing to the problem. Another strategy is to email the doctor. If your father in law will not include you in the appointments, you are still permitted to communicate information to the doctor in a one-sided fashion, and email or voicemail can be a good way to do this.

 i am going through a similar situation now.  my father in law has been an alcoholic all his life.  he has high blood pressure, hepatitis, and has recently been diagnosed with early stages of dementia.  last month, he fell without telling anyone, and we only found out when he started complaining of chest pains and we forced him to go to the hospital in an ambulance.  it turned out he wasn't having chest pains, he had fractured two ribs from the fall (minor).  while in the hospital, they put him through a detox regiment.  one week later he was drinking again.  the visiting nurse ran into him today, and he had a case of beer in hand.

my husband is really distraught over this situation.  we don't know what to do anymore.  everyone in the family has talked to him, even my husband's mother, who is his ex wife.  his doctor has warned him sternly (and i mean STERNLY) about the dangers of his drinking to his health.   he is constantly lying about how much he drinks.  

what do we do?  we feel totally helpless :(

Hi ConcernedDIL,

I'm sorry to hear about your father in law. Alcoholism is a terrible disease, and it does take the person suffering from it to admit to it and want to get dry and sober.

I can only offer up encouragement to keep talking to him. My own father died of lung and liver cancer, both due to his drinking and smoking, and he simply didn't have it in him to stop, although he tried several times. He enjoyed them and it was too hard to give them up.

If his doctor has warned him, and he chooses to make his own decisions, then you may need to step back and let him do his thing, but try to be supportive of any positive changes he tries to make.

Best wishes to you, good luck, and please come back and let us know how things are going.

Hi well my problem with my Dad has now gotten way out of hand.  My father is an alcoholic.  He lives alone (my mom died in 91) and I was never aware of how much he drank.  He is what they call a responsible drunk.  He goes to work every day and saves his money.  He will buy a bottle of scotch and drink it straight.  I still don't know how many bottles a week etc.

Last year, he became unbalanced and wasn't feeling himself.  He actually always looked drunk.  After weeks of begging and pleading, he went to the hospital.  He went through detox and they diagnosed him with alcoholic neuropothy.  He promised no more drinking.  I had caught him a couple of times, read him the riot act, and again no more drinking.  He was admitted 2 weeks ago to the hospital for detox once again and just came out yesterday.  His mind is wasting away.  I was just at his house and he asked me to buy him a bottle.  We argued and I left.  I have never had a great relationship with my father.  I am an only child, so when something happens, I am the one always there.  He doesn't speak with his siblings much and basically turned his back on all his friends.  He is not at the point  of total dementia as he knows a lot, but also lost a lot.  He doesn't admit alcohol is the problem and says he feels this way because he pushed himself too hard.  Everything is stress in his words.  Now I spoke with a dr. who told me to take his keys so he doesn't drive (he doesn't drive drunk) but he has 2 Lincolns and would call the cops on me.  He doesn't want to stay with us, and actually I am afraid of him staying because I have 2 young children.  He won't go in a facility, rehab or anything like that and the dr.s said since he is aware of his decisions there is nothing I can do.  He also thinks I am after his money so he won't make me power of attorney or put my name on anything, yet he makes me go to the bank for him to take money out after calling the banks and confiming it that I can come get it.  He today told me I do nothing for him even though I was at the hospital every day and night making sure he was ok.  I just don't know what to do anymore.  He also smokes 2 pack of non filter cigs a day.  He can hardly walk and doesn't want any help.  I don't know what is going to happen next.  if he drinks again, what happens??  Does the dementia just get worse, does he have to go to detox if he drinks tonight??  I am lost and any help anyone can give me, I would be forever grateful.  Sorry so long, tried to get as much info as I could...Thanks

Dear dilucc

I'm sorry to hear about your Dad's problems with alcohol and sympathize with your position.  I am taking care of Alzheimer's couple who have been drinking wine everyday for 65+ years.  One recently began to have problems with heart palpitations and cardiologist said to give up caffeine and reduce alcohol consumption.  My client said straight out:  "I'm sorry and it may sound totally perverse, but at this point in my life, I am not willing to give up wine completely."  She had said this already to her family and caregivers.

To address your concerns, I imagine you are concerned for your father's safety when driving as well as worrying he might injure others on the road.  I'm not sure how accurate this is and if it applies in your state, but someone told me that the family can call the DMV and let them know about relatives with alcoholism and request that the DMV write the family member a letter requiring a  new driver's test.  This can be helpful because if your father is unable to pass the test, then he will lose his license and the driving and safety issue will be solved outside the family.  The DMV will be the bad guy.

It sounds as if your father is subject to returning to detox whenever he is incapacitated by his alcohol consumption and you will be the only person able to attempt to predict or anticipate any frequency or timing of how often he will end up needing this.  Of course, he is at risk of mishap and accidents at any time that you cannot anticipate or predict.  The only other thing I can suggest is that you seek help from AA and a physician specializing in geriatrics.  There are also geriatric consultants in the social sciences who will know what you can do for safety and prevention, or at least tell you what you can expect over time.

Best of luck.

I have finally found someone else who has these concerns and will talk about it.  My 80 year old mother is a quiet, sometimes mellow/sometimes angry alcoholic.  She may  have some dementia, but I can't sort it out from the drinking behaviors.  Her Dr. has not listened to me about her drinking (combined wih morphine, antidepressants and more) and continues to support her growing morphine addiciton.  She has alienated her few friends and is close to losing the support of her daughter (me) and grandson.  Driving is a scary  issue, so the DMV information was good to hear.   She is able to drive to the store for cigarettes (has emphysema) and scotch whenever she wants to, but  not to her Dr. appointments or grocery store, AND "needs" me to do laundry, change bed, housecleaning, and take her out for groceries OR shop for her.  She is in bed 20 or more hours a day.  She have two serious back surgeries about 12 years ago and has some need for the morphine, however exacerbates her  symptoms and pain by being in bed all of the time.  I feel guilty about being angry, angry about being manipulated and tired because I'm working full time and putting myself and younger son through college.  I send my best energy for support to each of you.  Best of luck and don't forget to take care of yourselves! JJ

 Hey everyone

I wanted to provide an update on my Alzheimer's couple and their dependency on alcohol.  They have advanced a bit, but still in early mid stage.  After 2 hospitalizations since January, one for unexplained vomiting and nausea and one for TIA, we (3 caregivers) have effectively diluted alcohol by 50%.  We took charge of pouring and can get half water in the glass when they are out of the room and then we serve it to them.  There were a few conversations between the couple about how one of them thought the wine tasted weak.  After I pour initial glasses, I pour half of what's left of wine into an empty we keep hidden on lowest shelf in frig door.  Then I dilute the remaining half in the bottle with water and let them access their own re-pours.  They have actually checked taste of what they pour to what I give them and when they see it tastes the same, they are satisfied or let it go.

One day another caregiver told me that she was giving the husband a tad stronger mix as he exhibitis no problems and self limits.  So, one night I gave him a small glass of undiluted wine and gave his wife her usual 50-50.  Then from the other room, I heard him say to his wife: "This wine is strong!"  Had to laugh.  Conclusion: They are both feeling better consuming half their usual amount of alcohol, happy to continue their 60-year routine 5 o'clock cocktail hour, suffering no hangover symptoms, and saving money to boot. 

Hope this helps someone else.

JJ, wow, this must be so hard! I'm concerned that you feel the doctor is enabling. Can you take her to a different doctor? Let them know ahead of times your concerns and then they can see for themselves?

Harriet, glad to hear you found a solution to easing them off the alcohol!

I am so sorry for your situation. I completely understand. My mother-in-law is already in a locked facility.... her wonderful sons (not my husband) saw how bad she really was. We tried our best to take care of her, but she would not let us... There was nothing wrong with her! But now we are taking care of her sister( husband's aunt). She is on the aricept/namenda regimen but she insist on drinking wine. She will wait til we go to bed get up and go at it. It has gotten so bad that we have poured all th wine out and going from there. She refuses to shower & wash her hair. Ok done venting...So Laurel you need to have your mil stay with her other child(ren) for a week or so. They will change their mind quick! Good luck