Hello,

I'm so sorry to hear of your dad's gambling addiction.  It must be really hard to watch him be so destructive. 

Unfortunately, Medicare does not cover assisted living costs.  You can read more about that here.  He may qualify for Medicaid, which is needs based.  However, in order for Medicaid to pay for longterm care costs, they will have to be deemed medically necessary. 

Do you think that, perhaps, rehab would be helpful?  Or maybe a Gambler's Anonymous meeting?

I know exactly what your goin thru. My mother has the same addiction with a VERY similiar story.

She lost all equity in her home, has filed for brupcy twice. Owes almost everybody she knows. Ironically, she has been sober from alcohol for over 30 yrs, & still goes to AA mtgs. Fortunately she has a govt pension from the post ofc, but still remaining is the addiction. They say an addiction is an addiction, meaning it doesnt matter what the drug is (including gambling of course). I agree up to the point of early recovery. With drugs/alcohol you can go to the hospital, detox there, and then get placed in rehab for 30, 90, or up to 24 months at many rehabs or TC's. The difference with gambling is you really can't "detox" in a facility that I know of. Gamblers Anonymous is a good start. Theres a few long-term programs for drugs/alcohol/crime etc. One is called Delancey Street Foundation located in San Francisco. It doesnt cost anything. ITs long term (2yrs) and is the best in the country.

We are in a similar situation with my MIL. She has run through easily $250k in 2 years in gambling - has had to sell her car, and is potentially facing eviction/homelessness from her low-income-senior-housing complex. What are the legal options to try to keep her social security income going to pay her rent: an irrevocable financial power of attorney? Conservatorship? I can't seem to find any online resources for either of these in the cases of extreme and proven addiction -- but there must be cases as examples and/or specialists in this arena? (She is in FL) She has windows of hope where she seems willing to accept help -- but then has proven to insist on getting control of her $$$ back (which she then gambles away.) We're trying to protect her from herself at this point -- Any help / advice would be welcomed! Thanks.

I'm sorry to hear that both of you are dealing with such a tough situation with your loved one's gambling :( I think it's an especially difficult problem because, like the poster abover me stated, they stay convinced that they can get the money back "any time now".

I would definitely look into the option of trying to get a Power of Attorney of finances - of course, the huge challenge there is getting your loved one to sign off on it. You could also look into the option of "involuntarily committment" into a rehab facility. The challenge there is that a doctor or other licensed professional has to declare that the person is a danger to themselves or others, something that's much harder to prove when the addiction is gambling and not drugs or alcohol. :( I would think though that if it's gotten as far as possible homelessness, any arguement could be made for it, though.

Keep us updated and come back to post or vent anytime! Lisa

Thanks for the good thoughts. I have done some more research with a laywer. For others facing the same struggle, a durable financial power of attorney might be a short term option, but is revokable at any time by the gambler or drug addict.

Because we are not trying to protect any existing assets (*there are none left, just a mountain of debt), an irrevokable trust account is not an option (though if you catch the problem earlier, this might work for you).

We have only a trickle of Social Security income left to handle -- Social Security does NOT Recognize a power of attorney, rather wants to make their own judgments - which in this case, while more paperwork, is a good thing, because it enables us to make the case to Social Security that she is a danger to herself - risking illness and homelessness by choosing to gamble rather than pay her basic living expenses with her limited SS income. The SSA Program is called "Representative Payee" program and you can easily find info online.

Our only hope now is that we can present enough documentation to SSA to get them to identify us as a representative payee. We may still be able to get her counseling with the remaining SSA money monthly. She may be too far gone to recover from her addiction, but at least we can try to keep a roof over her head. Thanks to all for the good wishes: protecting someone from their own demons is an exhausting project...

Also -- if you happen to be in Florida, the Florida Council on Compulsive Gambling does have some resources, including a workbook series, that they will provide free of charge. Every little bit helps.

I have a Payee Account for my husband. Talk to your SS office and find out what their requirements are for you to be the payee for your parent.

Actually, gamblers go through withdrawal when they enter a treatment program, similar to alcoholics and drug addicts. So, yes, there is a "detox" going on. That's a part of the "an addiction is an addiction is an addiction". There ARE many similarities in behavior of the active addict, no matter the tool of the addiction. The inpatient program I'm familiar with in Minnesota is a 30 day program. FYI, it is not unusual for an alcoholic to switch addictions, especially to gambling. In some cases, the patient in treatment for gambling has been court ordered if they have broken a law, such as forged signatures on checks, stolen money, etc. Hopefully that won't happen to your mother but there are many gamblers whose disease progresses to that stage.

Don't give up on her. Sometimes interventions work. Has that been tried?

I'm sending you a hug and will send a prayer for you, too.