Wendy Wank

Caring.com Expert

About: Wendy Wank is a palliative care nurse practitioner at Hospice by the Bay, in Larkspur, California.

Monday November 12, 2007
1. My mother doesn't want to know how long she has to live, so how do I say the things I need to say before it's too late?
  Answer - Everyone has her own way of dealing with death, and your mother is clearly coping with her illness and mortality by choosing to stay in the dark. This puts you and your siblings in a very difficult position: You don't want to defy her wishes, but you do want to express your feelings and share these last days with your mother in an authentic way...
2. How can we persuade my mother, who's caring for my dying father, to bring in hospice help?
  Answer - Many people who've never had experience with hospice have misconceptions about what it means. Like your mother, many people believe that involving hospice in a patient's care amounts to a death sentence or that their loved one will die more quickly or won't be properly cared for. Hospice care does not accelerate the dying process...