Bonnie Bajorek Daneker

Caring.com Expert

About

Bonnie Bajorek Daneker is author and creator of the The Compassionate Caregiver's Series, which includes "The Compassionate Caregiver's Guide to Caring for Someone with Cancer," "The Journey of Grief," "Handbook on Hospice and Palliative Care," and other titles on cancer diagnosis and end of life. She speaks regularly at cancer research and support functions, including PANCAN and Cancer Survivor's Network. She is a former member of the Executive Committee of the CSN at St. Joseph's Hospital of Atlanta and the Georgia Chapter of the Lymphoma Research Foundation.

Recently Published on Caring.com

  1. Tuesday November 08, 2011

    1. Is there such thing at stage 4 Multiple Myeloma?

      Answer - Hello Katara, You are right,there are three stages in Multiple Myeloma. In Stage 4 for other cancers, as you know, the cancer has metastasized (or spread) to other parts of the body and has entered other organs. What I'm concerned about here is that she doesn't understand what her total diagnosis is...

  2. Thursday August 11, 2011

    1. How can we support my brother-in-law and his family through the last stages of cancer?

      Answer - I know this is a trying time for you, and when you're attempting to involve the rest of the family in his care, it can be very frustrating. Try not to feel guilty; you're involved and want to help, however extensive that may be. It's a good start.

  3. Saturday May 21, 2011

    1. How can we motivate my father to recover from radiation treatment?

      Answer - Hello Steve, It is noble of you to want to continue life with your father, and I applaud you for seeking answers to such a challenging circumstance.

  4. Wednesday April 06, 2011

    1. How can I help my mother become engaged with life again after her cancer treatment?

      Answer - First, I have to commend you for managing this for over two years. While it can't be easy, it is relatively common. Cancer patients, especially those fighting multiple types, often don't understand why they are still living -- in fact, they give up on life, trying not to fight the passage to the end of it...

  5. Thursday March 31, 2011

    1. What charities fight lung cancer?

      Answer - Hello, That is a very generous gesture. If you'd like to make a donation to an organization focused on lung cancer, The Bonnie J. Addario Foundation is very active: http://www.lungcancerfoundation.org/how-to-help/donate-online-now/.

  6. Friday March 11, 2011

    1. Should I let me father-in-law smoke if it means he'll take his pills?

      Answer - I have seen this before -- you're not alone in bargaining with the patient to do things that are GOOD for them. It doesn't seem to make sense. However, there are many considerations behind it: Could they clinically depressed? Are they fatigued or in pain? Have they given up on a cure or on life in general...

    2. How do I know if it's the right time for my father with lung cancer to enter hospice?

      Answer - It's tough to know what the right course of action is when you have limited information, but let's talk about what you do know. If he was diagnosed in November, that means that they have a baseline of what his illness was then. For example, they will have scans and other images that will show where and what size the cancer is...

  7. Thursday February 24, 2011

    1. Will my mother with lung cancer need full time care?

      Answer - Many people realize the complexity of lung cancer and the toll it takes on the body. When breathing becomes labored or compromised, the rest of the body's activity is impacted. Because your mums also had her lung removed, she will certainly not be functioning as she did before. However, that doesn't mean she will have to have full time lung cancer care...

  8. Tuesday February 01, 2011

    1. How do you care for someone who had their prostate removed?

      Answer - Caring for a loved one whose prostate has been removed can be very tricky, as there are emotional as well as physical elements to it. Physically, you need to care for him as anyone who has had a major operation. Make sure he has plenty of rest and fluids, and his pain is managed...

    2. How can I get mom to stop chain smoking?

      Answer - Hi Darlene, The desire to stop chain smoking is a common problem with not many good answers, unfortunately. While there are a variety of smoking cessation programs and products, the smoker has to want to quit for them to be successful. The gums on the market may be your best option: many are flavorful...

  9. Friday December 17, 2010

    1. How do I keep her spirits up during chemo?

      Answer - Hi Simona, As you've found, it's often difficult to keep someone's spirits up during chemo.

  10. Tuesday November 09, 2010

    1. Is a person on medications safe to be around someone getting chemo?

      Answer - Generally, yes. "Red Devil" or "Red Death" nicknames have evolved to describe the chemotherapy agent Adriamycin (also known as Doxorubicin) because of its vibrant red color and potent cell-killing properties. The agent attacks fast-growing cells in the patient, which leads to very visible external signs...

  11. Thursday October 21, 2010

    1. How do you care for a loved one recovering from cancer without making them feel helpless?

      Answer - Hello Anonymous, Caring for a recovering cancer patient can be difficult, and your situation is particularly tricky to address because a growth on the brain can mean many things. Your question doesn't specify what neurologic impact the growth has had -- that is, how it has impacted the patient's ability to function...

  12. Friday August 06, 2010

    1. Post-surgical issues after colorectal cancer

      Answer - Dear Anonymous, You've got quite a lot going on right now.

  13. Tuesday June 22, 2010

    1. My mom won't finish her radiation, and she's depressed. What can I do?

      Answer - From your email, it seems like you are trying valiantly to help her, and she is lucky to have your care. However, she has some major difficulties, and the first piece of advice I would give you is to not try to handle this by yourself. Is she able (strong enough) to move to a rehab facility? They may be able to help...

  14. Thursday June 17, 2010

    1. What are the side effects of Gemzar chemotherapy treatment?

      Answer - Hello, Have you seen this website: http://www.gemzar.com/Pages/index.aspx

    2. How do we ask Dad to be more careful in the bathroom due to his bladder cancer chemotherapy?

      Answer - You've made an important observation about safety here. Obviously, you want to protect your family, especially your grandson, and I commend you for wanting to impact your father's behavior.

  15. Tuesday February 09, 2010

    1. What can help neck pain after chemo treatments?

      Answer - neck pain can occur during or after chemotherapy because of the position the patient sits during chemo.

  16. Tuesday December 15, 2009

    1. How can I support my wife, emotionally, as she deals with lung cancer?

      Answer - You're in good company. I've had several questions about patients with neoplasms lately, many from caregivers experiencing things like you are.

  17. Friday December 11, 2009

    1. What can we expect in the final stages of renal cancer?

      Answer - You've been so strong for your family, while several things are going on. Let's address each one.

    2. How can I keep active with lung cancer?

      Answer - You likely have the double dilemma of low energy from your disease and a change in lung function, which makes it hard to catch your breath or do deep breathing. As you know from your history of going to the gym, breathing is a critical piece of exercise, and your challenge is not to overexert...

  18. Tuesday November 10, 2009

    1. Help paying for chemo if you don't qualify for Medicare or Medicaid?

      Answer - There are some programs to help pay for chemotherapy drugs for those who don't have insurance.

    2. Do drug companies help pay for chemotherapy?

      Answer - Many drug companies have programs to make chemotherapy drugs more affordable.

  19. Monday November 02, 2009

    1. My mom is undergoing chemo - but she won't wash her hands!

      Answer - This can be so frustrating, but hang in there. You need to understand why she is not doing that. My guess is that extra step takes energy out of her that she may not want to use. It's an effort to go into another room, partially undress, bend, redress, balance, and walk back to where she was before...

    2. How do I help my mother eat better to get stronger?

      Answer - Hi Skeeter,