Ann Cason

Caring.com Expert

About

As founder and director of Circles of Care, Ann Cason provides caregiving, consulting, and training services to individuals and public and private organizations involved in eldercare. She is the author of Circles of Care: How to Set up Quality Home Care for Our Elders.

Why I Care "Decades ago, I was caring for an 84-year-old woman who had been deemed senile, and I asked if I could bathe her. 'It's good to be clean,' the woman said. Afterward, the elder prayed out loud, 'Dear Lord, only you know how the mind of this woman works. Please protect me from her. Amen.' Yet despite her fears, she let me brush her hair and give her a lipstick. Then she looked at herself and smiled.

"As I continued giving care, I tried to learn to support people's strengths while asking myself, do I need to bring more discipline into this person's life or into my own? Can I accept things while making them as good as I can?

"Older adults and caregivers have to learn how to exist in simple ways, like having an ice cream on the way home from the doctor or sitting on the porch watching the clouds and bickering blackbirds."

Links

Recently Published on Caring.com

  1. Wednesday February 01, 2012

    1. Is there in-home help that can be paid through public benefits programs?

      Answer - I am sorry to hear of your mother's trouble. You need to be in touch with the local network to find if there are in-home care providers through public benefit programs. Start with the Area Agency on Aging. Perhaps your mother would be eligible for case management which would connect her to local services and programs...

  2. Friday July 01, 2011

    1. How can I transfer Mom from assisted living to in-home care?

      Answer - If you want to transfer from assisted living to in-home care in Scranton, you should contact the Pennsylvania Department of Aging. Ask for Home and Community Based Services. The patient must be over 60, a resident of Pennsylvanis, have a social security number. meet the level of care of a nursing home and also meet their financial requirements...

  3. Wednesday June 15, 2011

    1. Is there and in-home care service that would be able to help care for my loved one?

      Answer - I am sorry to hear of your troubles. There are depending on where you live, ih-home services that can care for sick people within their own homes. Caring.com has a service to help you find one in your area. However, there are some issues you need to address first. Out of the following information you need to make a plan...

  4. Friday June 10, 2011

    1. Where can I find an adult crib for my sister with Alzheimer's?

      Answer - I googled medical equipment in Louisville, Kentucky and goto the name and phone number of 5 medical supply stores in Louisville. THey will either have one or know where you can buy an adult crib in Kentucky.

    2. Are there any agencies that can help give care to my father who requires 24 hour care?

      Answer - Yes, there are agencies who will help you set up home care for your frail father. 24 hour care is very expensive, but sometimes you don't need that much help. What you need is someone who will help you set up care. I recommend a professional geriatric care manager to come to your father's home to assess for you...

  5. Saturday May 21, 2011

    1. Where can I get help caring for my wife with dementia?

      Answer - There are ways to start. Since you need caregiving assistance for dementia, you need help that is skilled in working with Alzheimer's as well as understanding the care that you need. Start with www.caremanagers.org to find a geriatric care manager in your area...

  6. Saturday May 07, 2011

    1. Is it time to sweitch my friend's in-home care provider?

      Answer - Changing home care providers is difficult on all levels. This work is not like working on an assembly line. Caring for old people is the front line of compassion. But it is hard to serve with loving kindness when you have so many issues of your own to work out. So how a business is structured is all important...

  7. Thursday May 05, 2011

    1. What are my legal responsibilities when caring for a parent who lives with me?

      Answer - You could use the web site elderlawanswers.com to ask any legal questions about caring for your parent at home.

    2. Is it time to sweitch my friend's in-home care provider?

      Answer - It does sound as if you need to change home care providers! You need a fresh start. But remember this: Caregivers need something they often don't get. You can help by helping the caregiver. Create conditions for care, for gentleness, humor, compassion, energy, sympathy and tenderness. Caregivers may have been trained by their agency...

    3. As an in-home caregiver, do I get breaks and lunch breaks?

      Answer - Caregiving is a service where a break is so much needed. We shouldn't have to ask, but we often do. What are our rights as employees? Do we get paid caregiver breaks to eat lunch or drink a cup of tea? Fortunately, Arizona now has help. Please call the Arizona Worker Rights Center 602-254-5452...

  8. Thursday April 14, 2011

    1. What kind of therapy can I do at home for my wife with a broken hip?

      Answer - Physical therapy for a broken hip is very effective. But the plan must be laid out by a physcial therapist depending on the type of break and the kindof treatment. I would advise you to go to the hospital or rehab center as soon as possible to get the recommendations for your wife's ongoing therapy...

    2. What should I say to friends who ask about my caregiving situation?

      Answer - I am sorry to hear about your mother's declining health. It can be tempting to talk too much about caregiving to thoughtful people who inquire. At the same time, you want to be as authentic as possible. There is certainly nothing wrong with saying that you are taking it one day at a time. It prevents sharing intimate details about your mother...

  9. Tuesday March 29, 2011

    1. As a live in caregiver, am I being paid enough?

      Answer - Your pay should be $500 a week. Many people make more than $500. But, $500.00 sounds reasonable if it inclucdes room and board. One way to look at it is this. Find out how much it costs for assisted livng or adult foster care or even nursing home care. Then figure how many hours you work or are available to work...

  10. Wednesday March 09, 2011

    1. What is an appropriate gift amount to give to a caregiver?

      Answer - Gifts for caregivers can be a sensitive subject. Sometimes elders try to get caregivers to work for very low pay with the promise that they will be remembered in the will.

  11. Tuesday February 01, 2011

    1. Mom won't use the bath even though we've equipped it for her.

      Answer - You are not alone! So many caregivers struggle over the parent's refusing to bathe in the tub. Tub baths are nice. Soaking parts of the body is hygienic. But don't worry. There are so many products to help cleanse and refresh.

  12. Saturday January 22, 2011

    1. How can I get home health care for my friend with Multiple Sclerosis?

      Answer - The need for in home health care for multiple sclerosis for people who are not elderly is not unusual. One thing to check is to see if your friend's health insurance covers any help from a liscensed home health care agency. It is important to get professional help to assess cand design a plan of care...

  13. Tuesday January 11, 2011

    1. How can I find someone to cut my father's hair at home?

      Answer - If I want to find someone to cut hair in an elder's home, I ask barbers or hair stylists (in the neighborhood)if they are willing to do it. Most charge more than the price of a hair cut to make up for the extra time. Over the years I found several kind hair dressers who like to work on frail, older people...

  14. Sunday January 02, 2011

    1. How do I get my spouse to stop hiding wet adult diapers?

      Answer - The answer might be in the question! The phrase, "hiding wet adult diapers," might be like saying hiding her pride. (Or his?) Nowadays, for adults, we have incontinence products or pull ups or special underwear. We don't use diapers for adults...

  15. Thursday December 23, 2010

    1. How can my brothers keep Mom safe in the bathroom without anyone being uncomfortable?

      Answer - I am sorry to hear of your mother’s illness. Family caregivers having to assist their parents in the bathroom is an issue that sends many elders into long term care. The fact that your brothers have gone to stay with her suggests a real willingness to help. Perhaps there is more room to negotiatete than appears on the surface...

  16. Wednesday December 15, 2010

    1. Is there any type of weekend respite care exchange available?

      Answer - Weekend respite care programs do exist. They might be different than you describe. Within your community,if you want to start this kind of service to benefit yourself and others,I encourage you to try to do it. It will take networking. Since your husband is in adult day care, start where you are. Do they have a support group for their clients...

  17. Monday November 15, 2010

    1. How can I deal with my husband's worsening Alzheimer's symptoms?

      Answer - You are a spouse caring for a husband with Alzheimer’s. I wish we could call you a warrior instead of a caregiver.

  18. Tuesday November 09, 2010

    1. What is it time for my parents, who both have dementia, to go to assisted living?

      Answer - Deciding to send parents to assisted living, especially with dementia, tugs at the heart strings and does not always work.

  19. Friday September 10, 2010

    1. How can I best clean my wheelchair bound mother after she soils herself?

      Answer - I hope you will be able to care for your mother at home for your sake.Your dear mother would be fine either way with a caring daughter like you. When you are dealing with incontinence for the wheelchair bound, there are so many factors to consider for your mother's safety and cleanliness. Also for your own health and the safety of your helpers...

  20. Monday August 30, 2010

    1. What should the pay rate be for live-in family caregivers?

      Answer - I am glad you have asked about a pay rate for live-in family caregivers. Many elders have to go into institutional settings because the family is too shy to ask for pay for themselves. I wish there were a way, to help all family caregivers with this delicate question. Family helpers are saving our country billions of dollars...

  21. Monday August 16, 2010

    1. For how many hours should we pay my sister's live-in caregiver?

      Answer - Caregiver pay is often a touchy subject for families. Room and board and a nice space is wonderful-----However it is difficult to know the benfit of having a friend living in house. One way to look at it is what you would have to pay an agency for live in care. It could run anywhere from $175.00 a day to $500...